


Like Lovers Do

by moonchild1998



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Friends to Lovers, I aged everyone up bc writing about 14 and 16 year olds makes me uncomfy im not shakespear okay, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, also idk if this is a thing but tw for talk of arranged marriages, also theyre both total saps, certain people are giant dicks, delayed gratification for the characters lmao, for personal reasons i will be ignoring sukkas canon, katara is just trying to have a good time, people really want to see Katara married, this fic really said sukka rights, was originally rated t but changed to m cause of references to explicit behavior, zuko and katara are love sick idiots but things get in the way, zuko is really angsty but i guess thats a realistic portrait of his character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:55:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 72,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25178791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonchild1998/pseuds/moonchild1998
Summary: The war ended 6 years ago. It's been two years since Zuko and Katara have seen each other. The Gaang tries to see each other as much as possible, but as time goes on, it gets harder. During a much needed break, the Gaang reunites to celebrate Suki and Sokka's engagement. When an inconvenience joins the group, Katara and Zuko are faced with the decision to either give into their feelings which have been bubbling under the surface for nearly 7 years, or do what their respective nations expect of them.OrZuko and Katara are lovesick idiots and life keeps getting in the way
Relationships: (Background) Suki/Sokka, (former) Mai/Zuko, Katara/Original Character, Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 281
Kudos: 553





	1. Space Between Us

**Author's Note:**

> For context, here is everyone's ages: 
> 
> Zuko: 21, almost 22  
> Katara: 19  
> Toph: 17  
> Aang: 17  
> Suki: 20  
> Sokka: 20
> 
> Obviously I don't own Avatar or any of the characters!

“Aang, will you stop pacing! I can’t focus,” Katara said, her eyes not leaving the pot of noodles she had been making for dinner. Despite being a water bending master, Katara had yet to master cooking, especially for larger groups. 

“I can’t,” Aang said, creating a ball fo air to ride around on. As if that would be less distracting. “I’m too excited.”

Katara looked up at her friend who, despite hitting a massive growth spurt, losing the baby fat in his cheeks, and growing into a very attractive young man, was still the boy in the ice at heart. He’d—they’d—seen and experienced many horrors in their past, and Aang somehow managed to remain so optimistic about everything. Katara hadn’t lost her spirit either, but she’d always been more level headed. She watched as Aang picked at his fingernails anxiously. 

“I know, Aang. I’m excited, too, but they’ll all get here when they get here, and if you keep distracting me, we’ll have nothing to eat for dinner!” 

“Sorry. It’s just... we haven’t all been together in, what? Two years? I’ve missed everyone.”

Katara nodded and smiled lightly at Aang. She knew how much this week meant to Aang, what it meant to all of their friends. It had been almost six years since the war ended, and two years since they were all in the same place at the same time. It wasn’t like they didn’t see each other individually, but the older they got, the harder it got to coordinate everyone’s schedules. They’d agreed to get together in smaller groups as much as possible but made major life events a priority for everyone. 

After the war ended, they all promised to stay in touch, and they had kept that promise despite all assuming large responsibilities. Katara had searched for and began teaching female water benders and eventually recruited masters to continue to teach young girls the art of water bending—and not just for healing. Katara also served as a peace ambassador for the two joint water tribes in the new All People Peace Alliance (A.P.P.A. for short) led by Aang, who spearheaded A.P.P.A. while also fulfilling other Avatar duties. While Katara’s real home was with her brother and father in the Southern Water Tribe, Katara spent much of her time traveling and had homes in all four nations. 

Toph went home to the Earth Kingdom and opened a free school for the blind. Of course, she was also scamming scam artists on the side for money. The school was more of a passion project. Sokka began his grooming to assume leadership of the Southern Water Tribe while seriously studying swordsmanship. Suki began rebuilding the Kyoshi Warriors and trained a special unit to guard the Fire Lord against assassination attempts. 

And then there was Zuko, who perhaps felt the burden of the war and responsibilities the most out of any of them. He became the Fire Lord at just 16, not an easy feat for anyone, and now, at 21, he was bogged down by even more responsibility. Katara was surprised he even found the time to write her. She wondered if he wrote everyone. A blush crept up her neck and onto her cheeks making her insides feel hot and funny. Katara shook her head at any thoughts of her and Zuko ever being... well, anything. They weren’t exactly ships passing at night, but rather parallel ships on similar courses, never destined to overlapped, or at least that’s what Katara told herself.

Katara shook her head again and tried to remind herself that the next few weeks were about Sokka and Suki, not her and what might have been with Zuko. Sokka had finally plucked up the courage to ask Suki to be his bride, and Katara couldn’t be happier for them. From the beginning, Katara had seen Suki as a sister, and though she couldn’t figure out why someone like Suki, so poised and strong and capable, would go for her goofy older brother, she had to admit that they complimented each other well. So many things about their impending marriage had to be ironed out such as living arrangements, Suki’s responsibilities as the chief’s wife, and how she could continue her work with the Kyoshi Warriors. Suki had been seriously considering stepping down from the Kyoshi Warriors for Sokka, but neither Sokka nor Katara would allow it. 

Katara couldn’t imagine giving up her passions for anyone. She liked being a teacher and ambassador. She liked helping others. Katara may be deemed the “mom friend,” but she wasn’t anywhere near ready to be a mother. Not that she didn’t want kids eventually, but she had spent so much of her youth being a mother to a whole tribe of children, and then to Aang and their friends, that she was allowing herself to be selfish with her adulthood, much to her tribe’s chagrin. As she neared 20, the Southern Water Tribes elders encouraged her to settle down. Her father, however, admired her free spirit. 

“I see so much of your mother in you, Katara,” Hakoda said last time they saw each other. “You’re selfless, fearless, and kind. You’re special. Not everyone who pursues you will deserve you. You’ve seen the throws of war and created miracles with your bare hands. You’re a force to be reckoned with. Do not give yourself to someone who cannot cope with your fierceness or will not encourage your will.”

Still, the elders persisted that she marry. Sometimes she wished it had worked with Aang. Things would be easier, but she didn’t think she’d be happier. The two tried to date for a while after the war ended, but they were so young and everything lacked… a spark. Aang wanted something traditional and lovely and sweet, and Katara wanted that for him, but not with her. Katara wanted something… electrifying. She was glad they’d remained friends, even if tensions were high for a few months. Aang always encouraged Katara to— 

“Hey, Sugar Queen!” A voice so distinctive pulled her from her thoughts. “Have you gone deaf in the 6 months we’ve been apart or are you ignoring me?” 

“Toph!” Katara cried out, turning around to join her and Aang in a pile of limbs on the floor. “I’ve missed you.” Toph, like Aang, had grown so much over the 6 years though not physically. At 17 she stood only at around 5 feet tall. 

“Yeah, yeah. I’ve missed you too, Sweetness. And you too, Twinkletoes.” Katara beamed at her two friends and she could see Aang physically relax in Toph’s presence. The poor boy had the weight of the world on his shoulders, and the only thing that truly helped him was his friends. “Um, is something supposed to be burning?” Toph asked as she sniffed the air. Katara’s eyes were blown wide. 

“The noodles!” Katara scrambled off the floor and immediately attempted to cool the water in the boiling pot by creating ice cubes. As the Water began to simmer down, Katara could hear Toph and Aang in hysterics. “I’m sure they’ll still taste good?” Katara questioned hopefully. 

“Sure, Katara,” Toph said between giggles and Aang howled. Katara brought a slender palm to her forehead. 

“Classic Katara,” Another voice spoke from the door. “Who put you in charge of cooking?” 

“Suki!” a unanimous cry rang out, and suddenly everyone was on the floor again. Suki giggled as she said hello to everyone. 

“Where’s Sokka?”

“He should be here in a few days! He said he had to "pick something up at the North Pole.’” Suki gave Katara a look which Katara knew to mean “we need to talk about this later.” Katara slyly nodded at Suki and fixed her attention on the engagement necklace she now wore. 

“Congratulations on your engagement, Suki! Even if it is to my dopey brother.” Suki blushed and subconsciously brought her hand to meet the dark blue cloth around her neck. 

“Wow, Sokka’s art skills have definitely improved. It’s beautiful,” Aang commented. 

Suki leaned down to whisper, “How much do you want to bet he paid someone to make it.” The group laughed, and Suki turned her attention to Katara. “I guess each sibling has their own strengths. Seriously, Katara, what are we going to do with you? “ Suki asked, but there was no malice behind her words. “Why didn’t you cook fish? Your Salmontrout is amazing.”

“I just wanted it to be something special!” 

“Yeah, she wanted it to be something special for Zuko!” Toph sing-sang. Katara’s heart stopped for a second, and she could feel a blush creeping up again, but before she could give herself away she spoke. 

“For all of us! It’s been too long.” If anyone had noticed her falter, they hadn’t said anything. She could sense Toph’s attention on her, though Toph wasn’t exactly looking at her. She was thankful Toph only smirked and kept what she must have sensed in Katara’s heartbeat to herself. Outside a foghorn blew. Speaking of Zuko….

The four made their way outside and down to the dock. In the distance, they could see the Fire Lord’s Naval ship attempting to anchor, but Katara’s attention wasn’t on the impressively massive anchor being lowered, but on the man standing at the helm. She could barely see him enough to make out district features, but she knew it was Zuko. He was poised and confident, everything a fire lord should be, and suddenly Katara’s legs felt like Jelly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi this is the first fic I've written in a long time i'm so nervous lol. I'm thinking this will have about 25 chapters, but we'll see! I'll be posting every Thursday/Sunday (hopefully)! Also I took a lot of creative liberties creating this post-canon divergent universe so


	2. Greetings and Salutations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be updating every Thursday/Sunday! Thank you to everyone who has left kudos/comments so far :)

Zuko’s eyes were on Aang’s home which was perched on a hill towards the edge of the island, but his mind was stressing about everything else. _Do I look okay? Am I putting on too much of a show? How will everyone greet me?_ Over the past 6 years, Zuko had slowly become more confident in his abilities as Fire Lord. The public had warmed up to him greatly as he worked closely with A.P.P.A. to ensure an era of peace and stability within the Fire Nation and beyond. Other nations, too, had been grateful to Zuko, who assumed full responsibility for the sins of his father and helped nations rebuild by funding their workers and therefore boosting internal economies. He’d worked to end homelessness for Fire Nation veterans and provided all past Fire Nation soldiers with mental health services. Zuko knew he was a good Fire Lord, despite his mistakes, so why was he so nervous to meet his friends?

He knew why, of course, because for the past 6 years, the people he had to surround himself with—military officers, advisors, and servants—blew smoke up his ass. They were rarely honest with him, despite his attempts to lower formalities, especially in his private life. The only time he was ever just ' _Zuko_ ' was in the rare times (even rarer as time sped by) that he was with his friends who knew him not as the Fire Lord, but as Zuko, the Redeemed Man. Even still, he found that as Sokka, Aang, Toph, and Suki became more attuned to international politics, the more they viewed him as the Fire Lord, even if they still saw him as Just Zuko most of the time. It wasn’t like that with Katara though. Katara was the one person in the entire world, perhaps maybe his uncle, who saw him as a full human, with all his mistakes, triumphs, capabilities, and insecurities. While Sokka, Aang, Toph, and Suki loved him for him, he never knew exactly where he stood with them—friend or very close ally. He never had to guess with Katara; she always spoke her mind and he loved it.

As he made his way down to the dingy which would take him to shore, his heart raced at the thought of seeing Katara again. It had been two years. The last time he saw her, complications got in the way. He left that week feeling conflicted, embarrassed, and a little heartbroken. Still, they wrote to each other constantly, and if she was still uncomfortable due to the moment they shared after too much wine, she never let on. Zuko hoped she didn’t remember like he, that the wine that flowed went to her head and clouded her memory, but he knew that wasn't the case. He hoped then that time had smoothed the edges of the situation. The last thing Zuko wanted was for things to be awkward, especially not on his first real vacation in a long time. The next few weeks would be about fun and friends, and not politics. Zuko knew he’d still have work to do and papers to sign, but he left his chief advisor in charge who definitely blew smoke up Zuko’s ass, but was fiercely loyal to the Fire Nation and to Zuko.

Zuko watched as his friend’s silhouettes grew closer as two men rowed his boat to shore. Suddenly he was sweating. Katara had grown so much in two years. Her hair was half-up in a bun which waterfalled out into the flowing heap that Zuko had more than once dreamed about running his hands through. She was taller now, too, and maybe it was just the outfit she was wearing, but he swore her curves had been accentuated too. _Stop thinking like that, Creep._ He stared and when they were close enough to make eye contact, Katara’s dark blue eyes twinkled the way they always did when she was happy enough to cry. Zuko’s stomach flipped.

Zuko stepped off the boat, only to be immediately pummeled by an Aang hug which almost knocked him off the dock. Toph was next, only she didn’t hug him, she punched his arm hard enough for it to go numb for a minute, causing the men on the boat to rest their hands on their swords. Zuko laughed and held up a hand to let the men know that there was no real threat. Katara rolled her eyes at that. Before Zuko could worry about Katara, Suki dramatically bowed.

“Your highness,” She spoke. “What an honor it is for you to grace us with your presence.” Zuko chuckled awkwardly.

“Please, don’t do that,” was all Zuko could think to say. He’d never been particularly articulate. Suki laughed and hugged him lightly.

“How are my Kiyoshi warriors treating you, then?” Finally, something Zuko could talk about. “

They’re amazing, Suki, really.” Suki beamed with pride. “And honestly a little terrifying. And I thought Ty Lee was scary before.” Everyone laughed, and most of Zuko’s worry fell away. He moved down the line to Katara who stared up at him. Zuko wondered how to hug her without it seeming too much. He was also acutely aware that two men from his staff were still sitting on the rowboat waiting for their next commands. He’d have to maintain some level of decorum when all he wanted to do was pick Katara up and spin her around in his arms. He wasn’t sure she’d like that though. He wasn’t sure she’d still like him at all.

Zuko wasn’t able to drown in his insecurities for too long because Katara flung her arms around his neck and slammed her chest into his. Instinctually, Zuko wrapped his arms tightly around Katara’s waist and leaned back a little to tighten the hug. He could feel her toes being lifted off the dock and he swore she tightened the hug. Her face and her hair shielded his face from the group. He took the opportunity to place his head in the crook of her neck and inhale deeply. She smelled of fresh linens and water lilies.

Before he could stop himself he breathed out, “Mmh, Katara.” He opened his eyes quickly, afraid of her reaction. She giggled as she loosened her grip. She pulled back to look at him.

“Fire Lord,” She quipped. Zuko scowled causing everyone to laugh. “Hi, Zuko," Katara said and he was smiling again. He put Katara down and smiled at his friends.

“Hey, Hotman,” Aang asked.

“Who are these guys.” He gestured to the two men in the boat. “Royals guards.” Zuko waved them off.

"Sir, are you sure?" One of the men asked. Zuko nodded and they began to row back to the ship.

“Wow, Zuko, pretty impressive,” teased Toph. Zuko blushed. “What, are your advisors afraid one of us might attack you?” She was joking, clearly, but she wasn’t far off.

“Well, not you guys exactly, but it’s just a precaution and formality. The only way I could let them agree to this long absence was by allowing a ship to accompany me. I promise they won’t be a bother though. They won’t interject unless we’re threatened or they’re asked.”

“Did they forget that I’m the Avatar, Toph and Katara are master benders, and we’re here with the leader of the Kiyoshi Warriors?” Aang asked. “

Yeah, I’m sure we could take them!” Toph added.

“Actually, they think that all of us being together so casually makes of sitting turtleducks for an attack.”

“But the four nations are at peace… the war is over,” Katara said, or maybe questioned. Zuko suddenly felt fond. Katara, ever the optimist. He wondered if her heart was beating like his.

“Like I said, just a formality.”

“Oh, enough talk of war and peace, and Zuko’s fancy formalities, let’s head up, I’m starving!” Suki said. Zuko’s stomach rumbled.

“Don’t get too excited, Sparky, Katara cooked noodles,” Toph teased. Katara placed her head in her hands.

Zuko nudged her playfully and she gave him a sheepish grin before retorting, “You can all just go hungry if you don’t want to eat my food.” They all laughed at her ‘anger.’

“Oh, come on, Katara, you know we’re just joking. Besides, I know your cooking has gotten better! The dinner you made us last week was great!” Aang, now towering above them all but Zuko, placed his arm on Katara’s shoulder, and Zuko had to actively remind himself not to be jealous of the Avatar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big fan of successful Fire Lord Zuko. The chapters start getting longer from here I think!


	3. Fireside

Aang was absolutely right: Katara’s cooking had gotten better. The group spent the evening around a fire. They talked of old times, their current endeavors, and cracked so many jokes that Katara was sure her sides would still hurt in the morning from laughing. Life had been good, but now it was great. It felt so good, so natural, to be with her friends again. She sat with Aang’s feet her lap as he laid on his back, telling some fantastical tale of his Avatar adventures. To her right was Zuko, who was staring intently at Aang, drinking in every last bit of his story. Katara wondered how much adventure Zuko got any more. Was it all paperwork and diplomatic trips to other nations? Strangely, she felt sad for Zuko, even though he got all he ever wanted, including the girl. 

Katara wished she didn’t like Mai, but she did. She and Zuko worked well together. They had so much in common. While Katara found her a bit draining at times, and slightly too negative, she always made Katara laugh. She seemed to make Zuko happy which was all Katara really wanted. Katara knew that their relationship had been rocky in the past, both before he was Fire Lord and after, but last she heard, they were stronger than ever. Every part of her itched to ask about Mai. Zuko never talked about her in his letters. She only ever heard about her in person or through her friends who had visited the Fire Nation. It wasn’t her place to ask. Zuko was private, and she could respect that. 

“So, Suki,” Zuko asked as he fiddled with the bowl in his hands. “What are you going to do about the Kyoshi Warriors after you dethrone Katara as Lady of the Southern Water Tribe?” 

Katara leaned over, letting Aang’s feet slide of her thigh, and kicked Zuko lightly. She ended up sitting closer to him in the process. She thought of moving back, but she couldn’t get her body to react, so she settled in. She was curious about the question as well, though she had been too afraid to stress Suki and Sokka out to ask.

“Well…” Suki took a deep breath. “I’m going to try and do both.” Katara smiled at her, proud of her soon-to-be sister-in-law. “I mean, the Kyoshi Warriors aren’t benders. We started in the Earth Kingdom, sure, but we have girls from all over now. We’re trying to expand, too. Sokka and I think it’ll form a good alliance between the Earth Kingdom and the Southern Water Tribe. Now that a group of warriors defends our beloved Fire Lord,” Zuko blushed, “we have connections to the Fire Nation as well.”

“Where are you planning on living?” Katara asked. She couldn’t see Sokka living on Kyoshi, but she couldn’t see Suki moving to the South Pole either.

“In the South Pole, most of the time, I suppose. We’re planning on renovating my family home on Kyoshi to give us a private place to live while we’re there.”

“Do you think the tribe will mind? You two dividing your time between places, I mean.” Zuko asked. 

“No, well, maybe… I don’t know.” Katara imagined it would ruffle some feathers if Sokka was gone all the time, but she knew that as long as he was a strong leader, the tribe would get over it. “We’re going to try it out for a bit during the longer engagement, but if they don’t react well, Sokka will remain in the South Pole fulltime, and I’ll travel back and forth. The Kyoshi Warriors don’t need me that bad, and I know Sokka and I can weather anything,” Suki said.

Katara knew she was right. She found herself smiling at Suki, beaming really. She loved her brother, and she loved that Suki loved him too. She was proud of her family. 

“Speaking of relationships, Zuko, how’s Mai?” Suki asked. Katara tensed immediately at the mention of Mai. 

“Oh, um,” Zuko stuttered over his words. “She’s… well, honestly, I don’t know. Last I heard she was seeing someone named Kei Lo. He, uh, was in a plot to overthrow me, but in attempting to stop him, Mai and him… got together.” Katara’s eyes widened.

“She cheated on the Fire Lord?” Toph asked. “Wow, that girl has got some guts.” She picked at her toes, totally unphased by Zuko’s revelation. 

“No!” Zuko interjected. “Not exactly. We’d been on and off for a while. I guess we’ve always been that way. We weren’t a good match. She was in love with someone I no longer am, and I was in love with… Well, the idea of being loved. Not worshiped, or praised, but actually loved by someone.” Katara’s heart broke. The small cracks in his voice revealed the boy who had been burned by his father, figuratively and literally. 

“Zuko, you know we love you, right?” Katara placed a tentative hand on his shoulder.

“No, I know. You guys know what I meant,” Zuko shrugged off the comment but not Katara’s hand. “Anyway, I think it’s for the best. She seems happier, anyway.”

“And are you? Happy?” Katara asked. Zuko stared into her eyes. She couldn’t help but admire the gold flecks in his amber eyes with burned with intensity when angry and passionate, but right now glowed softly. 

“Yeah, I think I am,” was all Zuko managed to breathe out. 

\--

Zuko’s breath hitched as he talked about Mai. He hadn’t really told anyone about the breakup, except Ty Lee, but that was less that he told her, and more that she had been there when everything went down. Sokka knew, too, because Sokka had visited him shortly after the rebellion had been quelled. All Zuko had said, though, was that he and Mai had gone in separate directions. 

It felt good to get it off his chest. Katara’s cold hand was still on his shoulder. He stared into her eyes. They were blue, but the yellow-orange reflection of the fire danced on her irises, and he was sure that he’d never seen anything more beautiful. 

“And are you? Happy?” Katara asked. Zuko didn’t know how to answer. He was so lonely most of the time. He had everything he ever wanted and more, but he wasn’t fulfilled. He loved his nation and his friends, but something was missing. At the moment, however, Zuko felt truly happy, perhaps for the first time in a long time. His back was pressed up against Appa, and Momo cuddled into his side. His friends were there with him with no royal pretense. He wasn’t there as a formality; he was there because they wanted him there. 

“Yeah, I think I am.” 

Suddenly Katara’s arms were around him again. If he wasn’t happy before, he definitely was now. He squeezed his eyes shut, sure if he saw his other friends coming towards him, he’d start crying. They were all hugging, and it wasn’t just to comfort Zuko. They were all so happy to be back together again, even if Sokka hadn’t arrived yet. Things were different now, but their friendship hadn’t changed.

When everyone pulled off of the hug and went back to a semi-normal conversation, Katara stayed close to Zuko. Too close to be unintentional, just far enough away that Zuko couldn’t feel her cool, calming aura anymore. When possible, he snuck glances at her, and more than once, he thought he caught her staring at him. No one else seemed to notice that Zuko’s attention was almost entirely on Katara for the remainder of the night. One by one, they all went to bed until it was just Katara and Zuko (and Appa) sitting by the dimming fire. The situation felt eerily familiar to Zuko. His chest tightened as he thought about the last time he was alone with Katara by the fire. Zuko felt an overwhelming sense of dread as Katara seemed to be thinking about the same thing. Her body was too rigid and breathing too rhythmic for her to not be very aware of the situation.

“Zuko I—“ “I’m so—“ They spoke at the same time.

“You go,” Zuko said, bowing his head, waiting for the worst. He heard her take a deep breath.

“I’m glad you’re here.” He had not been expecting that. He looked up at her. She was closer than before. “I’ve missed you.” He wasn’t excepting that either. “And I’m really sorry about Mai. I know that breakups suck, even if they’re amicable, but um… Was there really an attempt to overthrow you?”

Zuko looked at her with a sad smile. “There are always attempts to overthrow me. They’re much less terrifying than the attempts to kill me.”

Katara gasped. “There have been attempts on your life? But why? You’ve brought peace and prosperity to the Fire Nation. You’re the Avatar’s most trusted ally.”

“So was my Great Grandfather, Katara.” Katara bit her lower lip, obviously thinking she had upset him. Zuko placed a hand over Katara’s knee briefly to show her that he wasn’t angry with her. “I know that’s how you see me: as the hero to the Fire Nation, but do you remember how much you hated me when we first met?” Katara nodded. “That’s how so many people still see me. Not everyone is so forgiving. As much as I’ll be remembered for my triumphs in the name of the Fire Nation, I’ll always be defined by mistakes and the mistakes of my father.” Zuko looked away from Katara, unable to face the girl who had saved him in more ways than one. A few strands of hair fell from his topknot.

Katara pulled water from the air and used it to slick the hair back into place. Then, slowly, she brought her hand to Zuko’s cheek, turning his head so he would look at her. Her thumb lightly brushed over his scar, and he tried not to wince. As much as it didn’t bother him most of the time, when people stared at his scarred cheek, he felt ugly, disgusting, and shameful. Somehow though, in Katara’s touch, he didn’t feel those things so strongly. He’d never liked anyone touching it before. Not even Mai. The feeling of Katara’s fingers on the rigged, desensitized skin made his stomach churn in a way he couldn’t describe. Katara was the only girl—the only person—who had ever touched his scar that didn’t make Zuko feel like a spectacle. He reminded himself to thank her for that one day.

“You won’t be, Zuko. You’ll be remembered for helping the Avatar and for a time of progress for your nation. And for being a good friend.” Katara said. Zuko smiled slightly at her, unconvinced.

“Sh-should I restart the fire?” Zuko asked, desperately trying to change the subject and to get his heart rate under control. He had barely realized that it was nothing more than cracking embers.

“No, I think we both need sleep,” Katara said, pulling Zuko to his feet. Katara bent water from Appa’s trough onto the remains of the fire. IT hissed and sizzled until the only thing illuminating Katara and Zuko was the moon. They walked silently towards Aang’s house that had rooms for all of them. Zuko wanted to grab Katara’s hand, but he didn’t. Before entering the house, Katara turned and looked at Zuko quizzically.

“Oh, what were you going to say before?” Zuko didn’t want to answer, but he knew he needed to clear the air.

“About last time… that night by the fire… I’m—well—I just,” Zuko wanted to scream. He needed to apologize, but he couldn’t get his words out. Katara stood on her tiptoes to kiss Zuko’s unscarred cheek lightly.

“I know, Zuko. It’s okay. Me too.”


	4. Memories That Burn

Katara awoke suddenly to the sound of rocks being thrown against the cliffside. The giggles and shouts of Toph, Aang, and Zuko echoed through her ears. Though the sounds startled her awake, it was comforting to hear them having fun. Katara sat up and attempted to rub the sleep from her eyes. She barely slept. She tossed and turn for hours. She couldn’t shake the feeling of Zuko’s hand on her thigh, or how helpless he looked. For the first time since the battle with Azula, Katara became aware that Zuko wasn’t invincible; That she could lose him at any time.

Katara pulled herself out of bed. She stripped off her sleep shirt and slipped her bindings over her breasts. Katara fastened them comfortably around her rib cage. She grabbed a silky robe off of the door handle and placed it over her shoulders. She made her way to the kitchen to make herself a cup of tea.

“Did you have a good night?” Suki’s voice called mischievously from behind Katara. Katara yelped as she turned around.

“Spirits, Suki, you scared me!” Katara stared out the window at her friends that were sparring in the field. “How long has everyone been awake?”

“A while. I didn’t want to wake you since you were up so late last night.”

Katara hummed softly. She grabbed her tea and sat next to Suki, who was smiling creepily at Katara. Katara felt like she was on display. She ran her fingers through her matted hair which was disheveled from sleep. “Why are you looking at me like that?” She asked.

“What’s going on between you and Zuko?” Katara nearly spat out her tea at the question.

“Me and Zuko? Nothing! Why would you even think that?” They hadn’t ever done anything that would make anyone think that something was going on between the two of them. Nothing was going on between the two of them. Right?

“I don’t know, maybe because you two stare at each other like lovesick sabretooth moose lion cubs,” Suki said. Did they? _What?_

“We do not!”

“Do too!” Suki retorted. “Or how about the fact that you both came in an hour after the rest of us last night? What were you two doing out there?” Suki raised an eyebrow suggestively.

“We were just talking, Suki! Spirits, where is your mind? Nothing is going on between the two of us!” Katara was firm. If Toph were here, would she think Katara was lying? She didn’t believe she was lying, but then why was her heart racing so fast?

“I don’t believe that,” Suki retorted. Katara opened her mouth to speak, but Suki interrupted her. “Maybe you’re right, but really, nothing’s ever happened between the two of you?” Katara thought about her relationship with Zuko. When they first met, she hated him. She hated him long after the rest of the group learned to accept him. Then they were friends and comrades. They fought well together. Fire and water are opposites, so she felt most powerful when she was fighting with Zuko by her side. 

_And then he saved her life._

When you’re 14, and a boy literally jumps in front of lightning for you, it’s kind of hard not to fall in love with him a little bit. Katara was sure it was one-sided. Directly after the war, when she and her friends stayed to help Zuko and Aang with their transitions into higher positions of power, she was enamored with Zuko. It was a silly schoolgirl crush. She started spending more time in the morning to look nice for Zuko. She found herself wanting to be Zuko’s escape from Fire Lord duties. The crush didn’t last long. He had Mai, and she started dating Aang, not that it lasted very long.

Katara realized that she wasn’t what Zuko needed, not in that way anyway, and she moved on easy enough. Still, Katara always had a soft spot for him, and, yeah, they were a little flirty whenever they were together. However, she was sure that it was just the fact that they were comfortable enough to be playful without fear of the fallout. Their relationship was strictly platonic. _Until…_ Katara didn’t want to think of it.

“…No!” Katara pressed, but she hesitated, and Suki caught her. Her eyes blew wide as she squealed and grabbed Katara’s hands.

“So, something has happened!”

“No! Well, kind of. Yes and no? Nothing happened, per se, but we did have a moment… once.”

“When?” Suki propped up her elbows, leaned in, and rested her chin in her palms like she was about to hear the latest schoolyard drama. Katara took a deep breath. She had never told anyone.

“Do you remember the trip you guys took to the South Pole for my 16th Birthday?” Suki nodded. “As you know, 16 is a crucial age in my tribe, as it means that you’re old enough to marry. Many girls are already engaged by their 16th birthday, which is crazy to me, but it still remains an important part of our culture. I assumed that because I was an ambassador for A.P.P.A., and I was just starting my work with female water benders, that I’d be exempt from talks of marriage. At least for a little while.

“The day of my birthday, I was called before the tribal elders who urged me to consider marriage. They presented me with a young man in my tribe who was meant to one day become a military officer. I refused, of course, because I wasn’t—I’m not—ready for marriage. Plus, I didn’t know the guy at all. The Tribal Council got mad at me. They reminded me that as the tribe’s master water bender, it was my duty to the tribe to marry well and provide the tribe with new water benders.

“I was so angry, I stormed out. When I got back, you were all sitting around drinking fancy Fire Nation wine and bad Water Tribe spirits. I started drinking pretty heavily, and you guys all just assumed I was celebrating, do you remember?” Katara asked.

“Yes, of course! That was such a fun night—Er, I mean… I guess it didn't start out so great for you, but it ended up being fun for everyone, right? That was a good night for Sokka and me.” Suki was blushing. Katara shoved Suki lightly.

“Oh, gross, Suki! I don’t want to hear about you and my brother! Ew!” Katara was squeaking as she spoke, causing Suki to throw her head back and laugh. Katara started running her hand through her hair in an attempt to make it look somewhat presentable for the day.

She began braiding a section as she continued, “anyway, by the end of the night, we were all pretty drunk. You and Sokka almost didn’t go to bed because Sokka was concerned that I was too drunk. I probably was, but clearly, I remember things, so I couldn't have been _that_ bad. Zuko told Sokka that he’d watch over me, and Sokka practically ripped your arm off while dragging you to his hut. Knowing why now makes me want to barf."

Suki laughed sheepishly.

“The next part is kind of blurry. Zuko was showing me how he could move flames from one finger to another. Somehow I ended up with my head on his shoulder, and then his arms were around me, and my back was to his chest,” Suki squealed like a little girl. “It kind of goes downhill from there…”

“Oh no, Katara, he didn’t…” Suki trailed off, but Katara knew what she was insinuating.

“No, no! Nothing like that. It’s just... we were talking about life and staring at the stars, and admittedly it was all pretty romantic. I told him about what the Tribal Council said, and he told me that I was right to be angry. He then admitted that he was being groomed to marry Mai. He didn’t sound super thrilled about it. We kept talking for a while, and he told me that… he said that he’d take a bolt of lightning for me again if given the chance. I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I kissed his cheek, but in my stupor, I kind of missed and got the corner of his mouth.”

“You guys kissed?” Suki shouted.

“Not really! He, uh, well, I was kind of embarrassed, and he started moving my hair out of my face, and, honestly, I can’t tell if he was leaning in or me, but I could feel his breath on mine, and I suddenly sobered up really fast. I pulled away, and I must have looked at him like he had done something horrible because I’ve never seen his face crumple like that. I was so ashamed. He was basically engaged, and I nearly kissed him. I ran to my hut and didn’t say anything about it. We never addressed it. I wasn’t even sure he remembered it until last night.”

Katara’s face was in her hands, embarrassed and unsure of how to proceed.

“Oh, Katara.” Suki placed a hand on her shoulder. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You know that, right?” On one hand, Katara knew it wasn’t her fault, but on the other, she knew she had lead Zuko on in an odd way.

“I guess, but I just… I don’t think he really did anything wrong either. I mean, maybe it was just the wine, but something was going on between us that night, whether or not either of us wanted to feel that way. He told me he was practically engaged and I ignored it. On top of that, I just ran away from the situation. We should’ve talked right then, but I was so ashamed. He was… he _is_ the Firelord and his honor is so important, I didn’t want to tarnish it. Now it’s been so long and I know he doesn’t feel that way about me anymore. Not really, anyway. I think maybe we’ll always feel fond of each other but I don’t think it’ll ever progress.”

Suki nodded, soaking in the words of Katara. Katara watched as Suki searched for the right words to say. “You really don’t think anything will ever come of it?” 

Katara thought for a long while.

“No, I don’t think so."

"I think you'd be good together. If that's what you wanted."

"I don't know, Suki. Can you imagine me married to the Fire Lord? I just don’t see how that would work.” Katara was laughing, but it was a shallow laugh. Katara didn’t think Suki saw through the pain of the laughter. _Is that what I want?_

“Katara, Speaking of marriage, I should warn you—“ Before Suki could Finish, Aang, Kuzo, and Toph walked the rough the Bamboo doors of Aang’s home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, yes, time to introduce the main conflict :0 Thank you to everyone who has bookmarked, left kudos, and commented so far!!


	5. Complications

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehehehe have an extra chapter, as a treat.

Zuko’s laughter stopped as he stepped into Aang’s dwelling. Katara sat in just small sleep shorts, her under bindings, and a silky robe that fell off her left shoulder. Her hair was in two loose brains that fell unto her flowing brown locks. She was beautiful. Zuko was distracted as soon as he set eyes on her. Briefly, Zuko allowed himself to imagine what Katara would look like first thing in the morning. He pictured her unruly, brown hair sticking up in different directions. The covers would barely cover her sleep shorts that would have ridden up in the night. He imagined her bare back, which, if she flipped over, would reveal an unbound chest. Before Zuko let himself indulge in a fantasy where Katara was unabashedly nude in his bed, he turned his attention to something ultimately less sexy: Aang using air to pull the boogers from his nose.

“Were we interrupting girl talk?” Toph teased. Zuko swore he saw Katara duck her head. 

“No!” Suki quickly said, a little too quick. “I was just about to tell Katara about Sokka’s surprise.” 

Katara lifted her head. Zuko could sense her dread, and so it seemed could Aang. Aang made his way to Katata’s side and plopped himself on her lap, causing a “hmph” from Katara’s lips. Aang whispered something into Katara’s ear that caused Katara’s face to scrunched up in a way that Zuko couldn’t read. Katara was easy to laugh before she wrapped her arms around Aang’s middle and rested her head on his back. 

Zuko knew they were just friends, but it didn’t stop the odd pounding he felt on his heart. __ No matter how much he tried to remind himself that Katara had rejected Aang, he was still jealous of how effortless her comfort was with him. They could hug and joke around without the air thickening around them. Zuko often wondered if Aang still liked Katara. Perhaps he did, and always would a little bit. But the way Aang acted around Katara made Zuko think that it was more of a brother-sister dynamic for them. He also wondered where Katara’s affections laid. Was it with him, or with Aang, or with someone else? The thought of asking, and potentially losing her entirely, made his insides rot. 

He must have been staring because Katara gave him a small smile from across the room. He smiled back, keeping his lips pressed firmly together. Katara’s smile grew, and he was sure he could stare at her forever. 

“What’s Sokka’s surprise?” Toph asked. Suki looked at Katara sadly before she spoke.

“Sokka has been in the North Pole working to strengthen the relations between the Southern and Northern water tribes. He ran into an old friend while he was there who offered to give Sokka a lift down here as he makes his way to the Earth Kingdom,” Suki said. Zuko didn’t really understand why that was such a surprise. So someone is giving Sokka a lift?

“Old friend from the North Pole?” Katara asked. 

“A childhood friend of both of yours, actually.” 

Katara furrowed her brows for a while before her forehead softened. “Panuk?” Suki nodded.

“Wait, like Prince Panuk?” Aang asked. 

“Well, I don’t know about “prince,”” Katara began, “but Panuk was a friend of ours growing up. Sokka’s friend, really. He and his family moved to the North Pole when he and Sokka were 12 or so.”

“That has to be Prince Panuk,” Aang said. “I didn’t know you knew him! He’s the best. He taught me how to ice skate.” Aang was beaming. Zuko had heard of the prince but had never met him. His only relations with the Northern Water Tribe leaders were with Chief Arnook, who was nice enough, but stern and overly professional. 

“Prince Panuk,” There was a dreamy tone in Katara’s voice that made Zuko feel nauseous. 

“Katara, why is your heart beating so fast? Care to share something with the class?” Toph asked. Zuko had a gut feeling that he didn’t want to know what Katara was thinking. 

“Panuk and I were really close.” 

“So he was your boyfriend?” Toph asked with a sly grin. 

“I suppose so. We were much too young for that, but I guess that’s what I would call it. Panuk was my first kiss.” Katara was bushing, and Zuko felt sick. It’s not like he hadn’t kissed people before. He had no right to be jealous or upset, Katara wasn’t his property,  _ she wasn’t even his girlfriend. _ Still, he felt angry. He could feel his fingertips heating up with the promise of a bending accident. He worked to quell his anger and center himself using breathing techniques his uncle taught him. “His dad fought in the war alongside ours. I think our entire tribe was hoping that we’d get mar...“ 

Katara stopped what she was saying immediately and stared at Suki, who looked at her apologetically. Zuko couldn’t figure out what was going on, but he had the sudden urge to hug Katara. She stood up abruptly, letting Aang topple to the floor. 

“I want to spar. Anyone up for some sparring?” Katara stormed out the door before anyone could say anything. 

* * *

Katara was fuming as she plowed through the tall grass to get to the open field behind Aang’s house. How many times did Katara have to tell her tribe that she’d marry when she wanted to, and she would marry  _ who _ she wanted to? How could Sokka do this to her, or did he not know? He must know if Suki knows. Maybe he was being forced to bring Panuk to Katara. Either way, Sokka was not going to be safe from her wrath. Katara couldn’t remember a time where she was angrier. Normally Katara was pretty level headed, only getting upset if someone provoked her or threatened her friends. 

Katara could hear her friends chasing after her, calling her name, but she didn’t stop until she reached the middle of the clearing. She tied her robe tightly in front of her. She turned around to see her friends standing on the edge of the clearing. She knew she looked unhinged. Her friends looked worried. 

“Well? Who’s first?” Katara asked, hand on her hip. 

“You’re going down, Sweetness,” Toph yelled. Katara wore an aggressive, battle smile. 

Toph forced the rocks beneath Katara’s feet to rocket her into the air and backward. Katara landed flat on her back with a thud. Before Toph could get another hit in, Katara made a tentacle of water with her arm and whipped at Toph’s feet, causing Toph to lose balance. As soon as Toph was on the ground, Katara pulled more water into her hands and dropped it straight onto Toph, whose back had now caused an indent in the brown earth beneath her. Four rocks came barreling towards Katara, who easily dodged them.

“Is that the best you got, Toph? You’ve gone soft.” 

Katara was just messing around, of course, but it was enough to make Toph mad. A boulder erupted from the ground and smacked into Katara. Katara stumbled backward, feeling the air leave her body for a second. Her knees buckled, and she wilted to the ground. Another rock came up, hitting her in the stomach again. Katara was forced onto her back by the blow. She felt dizzy and bruised. Katara didn’t move for a moment, trying to figure out her next move. Despite how her stomach was feeling, this was helping her get her anger out. 

“Katara? I’m so sorry, are you okay?” Toph asked. Katara realized that she hadn’t moved for longer than she thought, and Toph thought that Katara was hurt. Katara realized her next move. She waited until Toph was rushing towards her to move. When Toph was close enough, Katara created tiny daggers out of ice and flung them at Toph. The icicles missed Toph’s body, but ripped through her shirt and pulled her backward until she was pinned high up on the cliffside. Toph’s mouth opened slightly. Katara had won. 

“So, Who’s next?” Katara asked with a smug smile. 

“I’ll go,” Zuko said. He stripped off his shirt, revealing a toned body. Katara had to actively remind herself not to ogle and drool over him. His body was perfect. Even with the faded scar below his chest, Katara still thought he looked beautiful. His arms were strong and sculpted. He really wasn’t the scrawny 16-year-old she once knew anymore. 

“Are you sure you can take me, Zuko? Don’t you have people for that now?” Katara was messing with him. She watched as his eyes darkened. They began circling each other. “What? No response? Do you have people for that, too? I imagine you don’t get a lot of fire bending practice anymore, Your Royal Highness.”

A strong orange flare licked past Katara’s face, nearly missing her ear. She yelped and dowsed Zuko with water. 

“I didn’t know female water benders could fight,” Zuko retorted. “I thought you were all healers,” Zuko smirked at her as their blasts of water and fire sizzled out in between them. Katara laughed as she created a ball of water and placed it over his head. 

“I hope you can hold your breath, Zuko!” 

Zuko breathed out a flame that caused the water around his head to turn to steam. Katara understood why people believed that fire benders were descended from dragons. Zuko advanced until Katara was almost pressed against the cliff where Toph had been hanging. She ducked and narrowly missed more flames. She quickly slipped under his arm but tripped on his foot that sent her barreling towards the ground. Seconds before impact, she felt Zuko’s hand wrap around her waist to catch her. She spun around in his arm to face him. He was breathing heavily and sweating. Katara’s mind flashed to a different situation where she might see Zuko like this. To force the thought out of her mind, Katara shot water right into Zuko’s chest and sent him toppling backward. His butt hit the ground, and he stared up at Katara like a child.

“Hey! That’s not fair, I saved you from falling,” Zuko whined. Katara laughed and offered him a hand. He stood up and put an arm around Katara’s shoulders. The two started walking towards their friends. “You fight good, Kat.” Katara blushed and relished the feeling of his flush body on hers. When she looked at Zuko, he was already looking at her. He didn’t look away like he usually did when she made prolonged eye contact with him. Instead, his eyes softened, and he gave her a smile. “You okay?” He mouthed. Katara nodded even if it wasn’t the full truth. 

“Feeling better?” Aang asked as he balanced on a rock. 

“Much.” That was true, at least.

Suki looked at Katara with a guilty grimace. Katara was angry still, but there was nothing she could do about it. It wasn’t Suki’s fault that her tribe wouldn’t listen to her. Katara excused herself from the group claiming that she needed to heal her bruises before they formed. It wasn’t a total lie, but truthfully, she just wanted to be alone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I know that the subject of arranged marriages can be touchy. In many cultures arranged marriages are an accepted and/or intergral part of life, but they are often also frowned upon by many western cultures as well. I am not trying to infer that inuit/eskimo/yupik cultures of which the southern and water tribes are based on encourage arranged marriages, nor am i saying that all arranged marriages are inherently wrong or right. Upon creating the main conflict for this story, I took into account Katara’s important position as the last water bender in the southern tribe and master water bender trained in both healing and combat, and realized that it would be expected of her to reproduce to further the bending practice, and to marry someone which would be politically advantageous to her people. obviously in atla this doesn’t become an issue because she marries aang and also it’s a kids show lol.
> 
> i wanted Katara’s character to stay true to who she is in ATLA: selfless, kind, strong, brave, and full of love. Based on this, in my mind, Katara wants to find love, but she values her duties to her tribe above all else. this crates a large conflict for her. I hope that you all understand that i am not trying to make inappropriate stereotypes or political statements by inferring arranged marriages. <3


	6. Can a Spark be a Flame?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um?? Thank you guys so much for 1000 reads! I'm literally shocked I didn't think this many people would be reading this. I'm posting a day early because I won't be near my computer all day tomorrow! Next chapter will come on Sunday!

Katara stepped into the creek, letting the tranquil water seep into her skin and fill her with strength. Katara threw her robe onto the banks, leaving herself in just her bindings and shorts. She brought a ball of water between her hands and began to work it into her bruised shoulder and ribcage. She winced as she healed herself. She heard the sound of footsteps coming from behind her. She stared down at her exposed body and silently prayed that it wasn’t Zuko or Aang. She was not in the mood. 

“Katara, can we talk?” It was Suki. Katara nodded, not knowing what to say. “I know that you’re upset, but please don’t be angry with Sokka. He’s already nervous enough, and the Tribal Council is making him bring Panuk here.”

“I figured as much. I’m just surprised Sokka is going through with it.”

“I shouldn’t be telling you this, he asked me not to tell you why Panuk was coming, but I think you should know anyway. I guess you already know a little bit. The council knows you’re stubborn.” Katara frowned at that, but it was true. “They know how you’re particularly against being forced into an arranged marriage, so they’re sending Panuk down with Sokka as a trial run to see if you could warm to him.” Katara rolled her eyes. “I know that the idea of being forced into a marriage is horrible, but do you ever think about why you’re so against every man you’re set up with?”

“What are you saying, Suki?” Katara was angry again. “That I’m closed off to love?” 

“I don’t think that’s true, Katara. I think you’re very open to love. I think you’re  _ in love  _ with a person you don’t think you’re allowed to have, so you’ve closed yourself off to the idea of marriage.” 

“Why are you trying to make this about Zuko? My tribe ignoring my wishes to ensure political gain and future water benders have nothing to do with him!” Katara yelled. 

“I didn’t make it about Zuko, you did,” Suki said. Katara’s eyes went wide. Suki was right. Suki hadn’t mentioned Zuko, Katara had. Katara knew she had confusing feelings for Zuko, but could she be in love with him?

“I…” 

“I love you, Katara, but I feel like you’re hurting you, your tribe, and Zuko by not acting on your feelings. Pluck up the courage to make a move. If you can’t, maybe you should give Panuk the benefit of the doubt. You liked him back when you were kids, right?” 

“Yeah,” Katara muttered, staring down at her feet. "Wow, tough love, Suki." Katara let out a defeated chuckle. Suki reached out and grabbed Katara's hand. “Suki,” she started, softly and afraid to continue. “Do you think Zuko and could ever work?”

“I think you owe it to each other to try." 

“And you think he likes me? Still, after everything?” Katara asked. 

“Katara, you should see the way he looks at you.”

Katara smiled. She started to say something, but she saw Zuko walking towards them, still shirtless. Sun hit each curve and contour of his muscular stomach, and Katara felt something warm stirring in her chest. 

“Sorry to interrupt, uh,” Zuko scratched his head, and Katara started at the way his arm flexed. Katara realized he was staring at her, almost as if he was in a trance. “Aang told me to let you guys know that lunch is ready.” Katara let herself be stared at, and she stared back. 

* * *

Over the next day and a half, Katara allowed herself to test the waters with Zuko. She was still unsure if her crush (love?) was because of the fact that she had denied herself closeness with him for so long, or if it was genuine. She started slowly by allowing herself to sit next to him any chance she got. Then she started finding excuses to touch him on the shoulder or leg. She could tell Zuko was enjoying it too. By the end of the first day, he was saving her spots and leaning into all of her touches. On the morning of the second day, when it was just the two of them awake, she draped her arms around his neck while he was sitting and drinking tea. He smiled and rubbed his hands over her soft arms and placed a tentative kiss on the back of her hand. 

Katara was shocked at how natural it all felt. She was still careful not to be overly affectionate in front of the group. She didn’t want nosy people (Toph) to ask her questions before she had answers, and she didn’t want anyone (Aang) to lecture her about toying with people’s feelings. She hadn’t done anything wrong yet. She was being no more affectionate with Zuko than she would be with the rest of her friends. It was Zuko who had kissed her hand. It was Zuko who pulled her into his arms at the campfire. 

So why did she feel so guilty about it?

The group sat around a fire. Sokka would be there in the morning, meaning Katara really only had one night left to figure out her feelings. 

She knew her feelings.  _ She liked him.  _ As she leaned against Zuko, who was leaning against Appa, she realized that she was actually calm for the first time in over 7 years. She could hear Zuko’s heart beating. The sound could’ve lulled her to sleep. She snuck a glance up at him to find he was smiling at her fondly. Things around her started to blur until it was just them. 

A dumpling hit her cheek.

“Hey, lovebirds, if you two are done giving each other goo-goo eyes, we are trying to figure out when we should leave for Ember Island after Sokka gets here,” Toph yelled. 

“What?” Zuko almost shouted. “We weren’t—We’re not—Ugh!” Zuko’s body went still, and he scooted away from Katara, and  _ oh,  _ that hurt. Maybe he was just embarrassed, Katara thought, but he barely looked at her for the rest of the night. Had she misread all the signs? Was Katara just another vanity conquest for the Fire Lord? Just some girl he could use to get attention when he was with her, but not a serious consideration. It would make sense why his letters seemed so impersonal most of the time. Katara sulked for the rest of the evening. 

Like they did every night, numbers dwindled until it was just Katara and Zuko, only this time they weren’t talking. They weren’t even looking at each other. Katara wondered if she and Zuko by fire were somehow cursed. The silence gnawed at Katara until she found the courage to speak. 

“You like me, right, Zuko? I mean, we’re friends, right?” Katara asked. 

“What?” Zuko’s head snapped up to meet Katara’s gaze. “Of course I do! Why would you even ask that?” 

“I don’t know, you seemed pretty embarrassed at the idea of us being lovebirds, I was just checking that we were still friends,” Katara shrugged and pouted. 

“You asked me if we were friends, Katara, not if I wanted to date you,” Zuko’s voice was cold and detached. 

“Well, sometimes you act as if you do!” Katara screeched before she even had time to think about what to say. 

“Me? You’re the one who sends me all these mixed signals. You lay in my arms and stare at me all day with your eyes practically screaming at me to kiss you, and when I tried, you ran away from me and then ignored me! I spent months thinking you hated me.” 

“Don’t you dare throw that on me, Zuko. I was drunk, and you had a girlfriend!” 

“What about the last two days then, huh? What’s that been about?” Zuko and Katara were both standing now and in each other’s faces. She was sure all her friends could hear them.

“I…”

“Well?” Zuko asked. 

“I don’t know!” Katara yelped. She was crying, and she really hated crying in front of people. She sank to the ground. 

“Kat,” Zuko whispered, and his arms were around her. She balled her fists in his shirt and cried into his chest. He shushed her, and she swore he kissed her head lightly. “Why are we always hurting each other?” 

“Fire and water are opposites, remember?” Katara was trying to make a joke, but it didn’t land. 

“I hate it when we fight. I kind of like arguing, normally, but not with you.” Katara smiled up at Zuko through blurry eyes. He brought his hand down to wipe away some tears that were stinging Katara’s cheeks. “Katara, you must know how I feel about you.” 

“I know and I... me too, but...” Katara trailed off. She was afraid that saying what she was thinking would make the inevitable reality. 

“But we’re both in powerful positions. We have our families to think about, our people, and our duties,” Zuko said, and there it was. The terrible truth that they weren’t meant to be.

Katara nodded. “This sucks. Don’t take this the wrong way, but sometimes I wish you’d never joined Team Avatar. Things would be so much easier.” 

Zuko laughed in pity. “I don’t. I’d rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.” The two sat for a while, holding each other. 

“Friends?” Katara finally asked. 

“Friends,” Zuko agreed. Katara held his gaze, begging him to throw caution to the wind and kiss her. He was the Fire Lord. He had more to think about than she did, but she wanted to be worth the risk. She prayed he’d kiss her. 

He didn’t. 


	7. Island Time Formalities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long chapter! I ended up combining two chapters because I felt like they were both a little too short on their own. Thank you for all your feedback! Reading the comments makes my day.

“Stupid!” Zuko screamed into his pillow. 

He should have kissed her. He spent all night thinking about how he should have kissed her, and now he was exhausted. His face was puffy from crying. The last thing he wanted was for the group to question his appearance. He was sure if they did, he’d start crying again. Actually, the last thing he wanted was to meet Prince Pompous and watch him flirt with Katara. 

Zuko was dreading meeting this man who would surely fall in love with Katara upon laying eyes on her again. _Agni, I’m an idiot,_ Zuko thought. He should’ve kissed her. Zuko fastened his hair into a topknot and tied it with the royal insignia ribbon. Normally he would never use the royal insignia around his friends, but given the situation, he wanted to assert some form of dominance. He stepped out into the main room to find everyone but Katara at breakfast. 

Zuko silently sat down next to Aang. Aang tossed him a bread roll then continued his conversation with Toph. Zuko wondered what they heard the night before. The door to Katara’s room opened. Her eyes were puffier than Zuko’s, and that alone made him want to start crying again. He had done that; he had hurt her. Katara poured herself tea and sat silently. 

“Katara, are you okay?” Aang asked. Zuko could’ve killed him. _Why would he ask that?_

“Oh, I, um...” Katara tugged nervously at the ends of her hair. 

“I let Katara borrow one of my books!” Zuko interjected.

“You can read?” Toph teased. 

“Yeah, um, last night we were talking about our favorite stories, and I mentioned a book I had. She asked to borrow it. It’s pretty sad, though."

“Yes, a good book, though! Great... book," Katara awkwardly forced out. , 

“Glad to know you're both still doing summer reading this far out of school,” Aang said. The group laughed, easily going back to their debate on whether eel hounds or unagi were cooler animals. Toph looked unconvinced by the lie, but she didn’t press the issue. Zuko smiled at Katara, but it didn’t quite break over his cheeks. Katara mouthed ‘thank you’ to him. He nodded. Zuko was sure that if they could make it through the next few weeks, that their friendship would not be broken by their feelings. 

The day past by slowly. With every second that passed, Zuko felt closer and closer to receiving a death sentence. It was dreadfully hot out. They spent the first half of the morning figuring out how to stay cool (ice cubes a la Katara and airpower a la Aang), and the rest of the day lounging about. Katara fell asleep in with her head in Aang’s lap at one point. Zuko was glad she was resting, even if he couldn’t be the one to hold her. 

At four PM, the group made their way down to the dock. Zuko had a strong sense of déjà vu, but this time he wasn’t the one arriving. A similar sense of nerves and anxiety made his legs tingle, though. His breaths were shallow and rigid. He stared straight onto the horizon with a militant stature. A small skidder boat came into view on his left. A person was waving frantically upon the mass. Sokka. 

“Ahoy, Team Avatar!” Sokka yelled when he was finally in earshot. “Who is this fair maiden who accompanies you. Be still, my heart!” Sokka pretended to faint as he set eyes on Suki. 

“Suki deserves a humanitarian award for putting up with Sokka,” Toph teased. 

“Shut up, Toph! I think it’s adorable,” Suki said. Zuko cracked the smallest smile at Suki. She was the perfect girl for Sokka: No one else would be able to put up with his “jokes” for that long. Zuko loved the guy, but still. Sokka was always upfront and honest with him. Zuko enjoyed Sokka’s ability to make him laugh and to remind him that there was more to life than Fire Lord duties. He also valued Sokka’s military council. 

“Suki!” Sokka basically flew out of the boat, onto the dock, and into Suki’s arms. She braced his hug but allowed herself to get swept into a deep kiss. Zuko smiled a real, genuine smile. He was so happy for them, even if his own love life was in the gutter. “I’ve missed you!”

“Sokka, it’s only been a week and a half.” 

“Yes, but that is already about seven days too long,” Sokka retorted. 

“Yeah, and what about me, Sokka? What about your sister you haven’t seen in six months?” Katara crossed her arms sassily. All evidence that she had spent the night crying was gone. Sokka turned to his sister. Suddenly Katara was in his arms being swung around like a doll. She giggled. _That's a marvelous sound_ , Zuko thought. 

“’ Course I missed you! I did not miss your sass, though.” Zuko knew he was lying. “Aang! You look different.”

“Oh, you notice something?" Aang sarcastically asked.

"I can't quite put my finger on it."

"Hm, not even a single finger?" Aang teased as he scratched at his newly formed beard.

"You grew a beard!" Sokka yelled. Aang laughed, then he pulled Sokka in for a hug. "I don't know it suits you."

"You're just jealous because you can't grow facial hair, doofus," Toph quipped. 

“Toph! Scam anyone good recently?” 

“You wouldn’t even believe it!” 

“I can’t wait to hear it.” Sokka turned his attention to Zuko. He bowed dramatically. Zuko fought the urge to snort. “Your supreme fieriness.” 

“Flameo,” Zuko teased. Sokka wrapped Zuko into a tight hug. 

“Zuko, buddy, the top not looks great! I bet all the Fire Nation peasants just go crazy for it!” Zuko winced. The only one he wanted to turn cray, he couldn't have. Zuko turned his attention to Katara as subtly as he could to see if she caught the comment, but her attention was on a tall, tanned, and muscular figure tying the skidder to the dock. _Prince Pompous._

“Oh, no. Don’t worry about me and the boat, Sokka. I got it!” 

“I just don’t want you getting a big head now that you’ve been awarded the ceremonial title of prince,” Sokka said. So he wasn’t really a prince? Somehow that made Zuko feel better. Panuk dropped a bag near Sokka’s feet. “Panuk, this is Toph.”

Toph was smiling widely. The two exchanged pleasantries, but Zuko wasn’t really listening. He was staring at Panuk or trying to without being obvious. Panuk wore a blue, sleeveless shirt similar to Sokka’s that revealed large arm muscles. Zuko was in shape, but this guy was ripped. Similar to Hakoda, he had shoulder-length brown hair that was fashioned half-up. The lightest dusting of freckles covered Panuk’s cheeks and nose. He was objectively handsome. Zuko felt sick as he realized that Katara was staring too. 

Zuko snapped back into focus when he heard Suki say, “Good to see you again, Panuk! Thank you for not killing my fiancé.” Panuk’s laughter shook the dock. It was infectious. Zuko glanced at Katara, but he couldn’t read the look on her face. 

“Little 'Tara of the Southern Water Tribe," Panuk said, beaming down at Katara. Zuko’s face scrunched up at the nickname. 

“Hi, Panuk,” Katara chirped. “Or do I need to refer to you as Prince Panuk now?” Katara smiled the way she did when she was flirting. Zuko’s heart sank. There was that shaking laugh again. 

“I think we can skip the formalities, ‘Tara. You look amazing. It’s great to see you again.” Katara returned a flashing smile to Panuk before wrapping her arms around his neck and allowing herself to be lifted fully off the dock. Zuko couldn’t help but think that the hug lasted a little too long and that his hand placement was a little too low on Katara’s backside. After setting Katara down, Panuk moved down the line to face Zuko.

“Fire Lord Zuko,” Panuk bowed respectfully. Zuko returned the bow with much less vigor. Zuko could tell the group was waiting for his normal: ‘oh please, just call me Zuko’ spiel which he gave everyone, but he wasn’t feeling so causal today. Zuko knew it was wrong, but he wanted Panuk to know where he stood. Zuko caught Katara trying to suppress a smile out of the corner of his eye. When she saw him watching her, Katara bowed very subtly. Zuko smiled. She was making fun of Panuk. “It’s an honor to meet you. I look forward to working together in the future to continue this time of peace in the world.” 

“Likewise, Prince Panuk.” Zuko wanted to call him just ‘Panuk’ to really drive the point home, but he knew it would be disrespectful.

“That’s quite a ship you got out there,” Panuk said. 

“Yes, well, the imperial navy insists on being my babysitters.” Panuk didn’t seem to understand the sarcasm that dripped from Zuko’s voice. 

“Understandable. We wouldn’t want anything happening to the new Firelord, would we?” Panuk smiled. The comment rubbed Zuko wrong. 

“Come on up for dinner, Panuk,” Aang said, guiding Panuk up the hill. Katara brushed passed Zuko in an attempt to walk with Panuk and Aang. 

“Oh, excuse me, Fire Lord Zuko,” She whispered as she passed. 

“You’re excused, “Tara.” Katara didn’t physically react to his comment, but he heard her snort, and that was good enough for him. 

* * *

Panuk was even cuter than Katara remembered. His hug still made her insides feel fuzzy. He was still as charming as ever. Why wasn’t she happy? Maybe it had to do with the fact that she had ripped out her own heart the night before, and she and Zuko both had to step on it. 

“Oh, excuse me, Fire Lord Zuko,” She whispered as she passed Zuko in a feeble attempt to make things normal. 

“You’re excused, ‘Tara.” Katara didn’t turn, but she snorted. They’d be okay, right? She brushed her doubts away and caught up with Panuk and Aang. If she couldn’t be with Zuko, she was going to at least try to be kind to Panuk. She watched his arm muscles flex as he used his hands to tell Aang a fishing story. Maybe being betrothed to Panuk wouldn’t be so horrible. 

“Where’s your stuff, Panuk?” Katara asked when they got to the top of the hill. He only had Sokka’s bag. 

“I’m afraid I don’t understand?” 

“Aren’t you staying with us tonight?” Katara asked. 

“Oh. I don't want to intrude. I can sleep in my boat,” Panuk said. Yep, he’s still Panuk: Polite as ever. 

“Nonsense!” Aang said, “I had this home constructed with enough rooms for all my friends and then some. You’ll stay with us tonight. Why don’t you go get your bag and then Katara can show you to your room!” Aang smiled suggestively at Katara. She bet he was feeling really good about himself for giving them alone time. Katara stuck her tongue out at Aang.

“Well, that wasn’t very diplomatic of you, Katara. My, the Northern Water tribe just might have to revoke your ambassador status.” Panuk was joking, but Katara’s heart went cold. She didn't find the joke very amusing, but she didn't want to start anything. 

“Who’d help you if I didn’t?” 

“I suppose we need you, don’t we? Care to accompany me to grab my bag?” Panuk offered her an arm. Katara took it with a small smile. She could feel Zuko’s eyes were burning holes in Panuk’s back. The pair made their way back down to Panuk’s boat. The small talk was easy, and Katara felt completely comfortable. But that was all she felt, even when he called her beautiful. 

“No way,” Katara said when they got down to the boat. “Is this Yura?” Panuk laughed. Yura was his boat. It had been his pride and joy. 

“Well, no, not the same Yura. I couldn’t bring her when we moved, but she is an exact replica.”

“You did a great job remaking her,” Katara ran her hand across the wooden frame on the bow. “You even remade the dent from when we all went ice dodging!” Katara’s finger dipped into a large groove that had originally been made from a piece of falling ice. Katara was only 9 when it happened. Ice dodging was pretty dangerous, and they lied to their parents saying they had gone fishing. That was the day she learned how to water bend ice. Panuk laughed again. 

“Of course I did! That is one of my favorite memories with Yura, and with you.” Panuk was suddenly much closer to Katara then he had been. With his bag in one hand, he used his other to cup her face. “You were incredible that day.” Katara thought Panuk might kiss her. She wasn’t sure if she was going to let him. “Plus we made Sokka wet himself which was a huge bonus,” Panuk said with a laugh, stepping back from Katara. Katara laughed nervously. 

“It’s not that hard to do, really,” Katara said. They walked back to the house, sharing memories and antidotes. 

“It’s so good to see you, Katara, really. You’ve changed so much.” Katara’s face scrunched up. “No. in a good way! You’re so mature. You have all these powerful friends and you hold your own within the group.” Katara laughed, realizing that she did have some pretty incredible friends, but she didn’t think about their positions when she thought of them. 

“Yeah, but I mean I met Aang when he was twelve, and a lot of the magic wears off when you live with a twelve-year-old boy,” Katara joked. 

“Well, what about the Fire Lord? That’s quite a powerful friend to have. He seems… stiff?” 

“Zuko? No, he’s just… formal, at first. He’s actually quite fun once he lightens up.” 

“I’ve heard he’s a bit of a hothead,” Panuk chuckled at his own joke. Katara didn’t find it funny. 

“Zuko’s got a lot on his plate, but I promise he’s a really nice guy.”

“I just can’t believe you’re on a first-name basis with the Fire Lord.” Katara didn’t want to talk about Zuko anymore. She showed Panuk his room. 

“So, ‘Prince,’ when did the title change happen? Last I heard your dad wasn’t the chief. Did something happen to Chief Arnook?” 

“No, Chief Arnook is… fine I guess. My dad has basically been running the tribe since Yue died. Arnook didn’t handle it well. None of our people did. Since Arnook had no other children, he appointed me as his successor. We’re working on rebuilding, but Arnook just lost his motivation to lead.” 

Katara looked down, feeling guilty for Yue’s death. “Right, yeah, that makes sense. Yue is a hero.” Katara wanted to cry. 

“Oh, hey, look, Katara, don’t beat yourself up. What happened to Yue wasn’t _your fault._ Out of everyone on this island, you're the last person I'd blame.” Katara snapped her head up.

“What are you insinuating?” 

“Look, he may be a good person or whatever now, but Fire Lord Zuko needs to answer for his mistakes. The Northern Water Tribe was hurt by him.” Panuk said. Katara could feel her blood boiling. It took everything in her not to scream. 

“What happened to Yue was not Zuko’s fault. It was General Zhao’s. Zuko pays for his mistakes every single day. He has worked so hard to be a fair and honest leader. He’s paid every nation reparations for the mistakes of his father. Do not sit there and blame him for Yue when you know it wasn't his fault.” She was fuming. 

“Hey, hey,” Panuk rubbed her arm to calm her down, though it really just annoyed her more. “I admire your loyalty, okay? I personally have nothing against him, but you have to understand where I’m coming from as a leader, right?” Katara placed her head in her hands. Regretfully, she did understand. “Let’s go get some dinner, okay?” 

Katara calmed down eventually. She was still angry about Panuk’s comments, but it was hard to hold a grudge when you were watching your brother attempt to wrestle the Avatar. Watching Sokka interact with their friends made Katara feel so happy. Things felt right again. They were all back together again, and nothing could ruin that. 

And then a hand rested on her knee. 

She turned with a bright smile, somehow expecting the hand to belong to Zuko, but it was Panuk’s rough hand that sat on her leg. Her smile faltered for a second. _Be nice, Katara,_ she reminded herself. She nodded slightly at Panuk who kept his hand on her knee. She wished he’d take it off, but she knew how important it was to at least be cordial to him. _It’s just for one night._

“So, Panuk, where are you heading next?” Toph asked. 

“Republic City in the Earth kingdom. I have a meeting with their trading company.” 

“That’s near where we’re headed. We’re heading to Ember Island, why don’t you come with us and we can separate from there!” Aang offered. Katara stiffened; her good mood was ruined. She didn’t want Panuk to come. Nothing against Panuk, of course, she wanted to enjoy her limited time with her friends without any outsiders. 

“That’d be so fun!” Sokka added. “You’ll love riding on Appa!”

“I don’t think there will be enough room on Appa,” Katara said. Everyone stared at her. Her face felt hot. “I mean, we all have pretty substantial bags, and we’re not exactly kids anymore. Aang’s legs alone stretch from one side of the saddle to the other. What would we do with your boat? We can’t tow it on Appa.”

“You’re right, Katara. Plus, I wouldn’t want to intrude on your trip,” Panuk said. _Geez, how thoughtful of you._

“We could always take my ship,” Zuko said quietly. 

“What?” Sokka asked.

“Yeah, what?” Katara glared at a sheepish looking Zuko.

“We could take my ship. There’s plenty of room on it for everyone.” Appa interrupted Zuko with a small roar. “Yes, even you Appa.” Zuko pet the Bison. “We have plenty of food for you, too. I’m sure my crew is bored out of their minds. They’d love to have guests. We can tow your boat, Panuk.” Everyone in the group had stars in their eyes, everyone except Katara.

“That’s wonderful, Zuko. How kind of you!” Suki squealed.

“I can’t believe we’re going to get on A Fire Nation ship!” Sokka yelled.

“You’ve already been on a Fire Nation ship, idiot,” Toph said.

“Yes, but this is different; this is _the_ Fire Nation ship,” Sokka retorted.

“Thank you for your kind offer, Fire Lord Zuko. I would love to accompany you all on this journey,” Panuk said with a kind smile. Katara wanted to scream. She didn’t want him there. It was at least a three-day journey to Ember Island. Panuk leaned in and whispered to Katara, “This just gives us more time to spend together.” He squeezed her knee.

_Great._


	8. A Ship is Just a Boat

_ Why do I always get myself into situations I don’t want to be in?  _ Zuko yelled internally.

Zuko bounced his knee anxiously as he waited for everyone to get their stuff together. He had been up all since dawn broke. Growing up in the royal family taught him to be overly gracious to those who would one day be useful to him. His uncle taught him to be overly gracious to everyone because people, no matter who they are, deserve respect and kindness. Even if they had spent all night with their hands on the girl you wanted. Sometimes he hated being a good person. Life was worse, but arguably easier when he was a spoiled prince. Katara seemed mad that he offered to help Panuk, which confused Zuko. She had been so happy to show Panuk his room and get alone time with him. She had let him rub his hand up and down her leg all night. Zuko wished he could tell what she was thinking.

“It was really nice of you to let us use your ship,” Aang said, appearing next to Zuko. Momo chittered on his shoulder. He jumped from Aang's shoulder to Zuko's and nuzzled Zuko's cheek. Zuko pet the lemur behind the ears. 

“Yeah, well, it’s been known to happen,” Zuko joked.

“Come on, Zuko. You know that’s not what I mean.” Zuko smiled and nodded. “Are you excited to see Zuko’s ship, boy?” Aang asked Appa. Appa let out a low growl.

“Don’t be like that, Appa. My crew will take good care of you. I had someone go into town to get you the finest hay around,” Zuko said, petting the bison’s leg. Appa licked Zuko’s face, drenching him in spit. “Ah, yuck.”

“You know, I’ve heard being drenched in Bison saliva is supposed to be good luck,” Sokka said, coming out of the house with Sukki and Toph.

“Who told you that?” Aang asked.

“You did!”

“Yeah, Sokka, I was making fun of you,” Aang said. Sokka’s jaw dropped, but he laughed with Aang.

Behind Sokka, Suki, and Toph, Zuko could make out the approaching figures of Panuk and Katara. Panuk was carrying Katara’s bag, and he had his arm around her shoulder. Katara was laughing at something he said. Her smile was big, but her eyes weren’t as scrunched as they usually were when she thought something was genuinely funny. Once again, he wished he could tell what she was thinking.

The group wasted no time mounting Appa and settling into the saddle. Katara was right, they would’ve been too cramped on Appa. The middle of the saddle was a mess of limbs, and that was with Suki sitting on Sokka’s lap. He made a joke about how uncomfortable he was but everyone could see how happy he was to have Suki snuggled into his arms. Zuko felt jealous of how easy love came for the two of them.

“Do we have to call you ‘Your Highness’ on your ship?” Sokka asked. Zuko first thought that was a weird question, but realized it was kind of valid. They’d be around Fire Nation naval officers and Zuko’s personal staff. They’d all visited him in the Fire Nation, but this was different than hanging out in Zuko’s private quarters, or at one of his vacation homes.

“No, I’d prefer it if you didn’t. It makes me uncomfortable when you guys refer to me that way in a serious context. My staff might say something like that, though, no matter how many times I ask them not to.”

Zuko’s staff was full of exceptionally kind and honorable people. When he asked them to call him Zuko in casual conversations, they had a hard time with it. He didn’t really blame them, though. Both his father and Azula had been obsessed with titles and separating themselves from the "lowly peasants' they ruled over. Zuko, however, wanted to be a man of the people. The only person he could get to call him Zuko was Ming Lee, who was the chief military advisor and accompanied Zuko on all of his journeys. He was sure that Ming Lee wouldn’t refer to him as Zuko around his friends, though.

“Pft, ‘your staff.’ You’re so fancy, Zuko,” Katara said. She seemed angry. Was she angry with him?

“I didn’t mean for it to come off that way. I just wanted you guys to know what it might be like.”

“I know,” Katara muttered. Zuko watched Panuk squeeze Katara's arm, and she smiled ever so slightly.

Appa landed with a small thud on the main deck of Zuko’s ship. Ming Lee and several other members of Zuko’s staff were waiting to greet them. Zuko helped everyone off of Appa. Ming Lee bowed to greet them, and they all bowed back.

“Welcome, Avatar Aang and friends, to Ursa Kai, the Fire Lord’s personal ship. I’m Ming Lee, Chief Military officer and advisor to Fire Lord Zuko. Please make yourself at home on our fine ship. If any of you need anything at all, please ask. While you are here, you are the prestigious guests of the Fire Nation. It is our honor to be of service.”

Zuko blushed, a little embarrassed of the fuss, but when he saw how impressed his friends looked, he stood up a little straighter. He knew it was stupid to be ashamed of his position because his friends were just as powerful, but if he was being honest, he still wasn’t sure he deserved the title of Fire Lord. Two women and one man on his staff stepped forward. They bowed to Zuko, who nodded his head politely at them.

“May we take your bags?” The man, Arno, asked. The group looked at Zuko, who nodded again. His friends handed their bags off.

“Do you know which bags go where?” Zuko asked.

“Yes, Your Highness. We’ve been briefed on all your requests for the journey,” Arno said. Zuko nodded with a smile, and the three staff members scurried away with bags in tow.

“Requests?” Suki asked.

“I just wanted to make sure you were all comfortable while you’re here.”

“Wow, Sifu Hotman. What a gracious host,” Aang bowed dramatically, and Zuko punched him lightly in the arm.

“How about a tour and then some breakfast?”

* * *

The more Zuko showed off the ship, the more confident he felt. Zuko designed this ship and added his own personality to its traditional design. He loved it. Aang, Toph, Suki, and Sokka were amazed. Zuko was particularly excited to show Sokka the War Room. Zuko hoped he’d never have to actually use it, but it was full of history that he knew Sokka would love. Panuk seemed impressed too. He asked insightful questions and admired Zuko’s knowledge. If it wasn’t for Panuk holding Katara’s hand the whole time, and whispering into her ear, Zuko could have warmed to the guy. Katara was harder to read than their friends. Her face remained blank most of the tour. Zuko tried not to let that affect him.

He showed them the gold-clad, iron spiral staircase which led from the deck into the lounge that was used for meals. He showed them the parlor that had a strict, “no-politics” policy. Zuko told them it was for drinking, music, and Pai Sho only (not that he particularly liked the game, but it was an ode to his uncle). He showed them the crew’s quarters that he spent extra time designing to make them comfortable and spacious. He ended the tour showing them their rooms. He gave Sokka and Suki the bedroom that would’ve belonged to the Fire Lord’s parents, but considering Zuko’s family history, had been designed for future in-laws. Toph and Aang received the rooms meant for children or siblings of the Fire Lord. Panku received a guest room, but Zuko, sadistic as ever, gave him the smallest room.

Then there was Katara’s room, or should he say  _ rooms _ . Zuko gave Katara the rooms meant for the Fire Lady and the eldest child of the Fire Lord. Unlike the rest of her friends, Katara had a large lounge. This would eventually be the Fire Lady's private space. It connected to Zuko’s quarters through a large wooden door that Zuko instructed remained closed. The lounge was also connected to a large room meant for the Fire Lord’s eldest child. Zuko wanted her to have the nicest space. He also wanted her close to him and far from Panuk. Was that messed up? Maybe, but Zuko couldn’t be bothered to care.

Zuko held his breath as the Katara peered inside her room. Zuko wasn’t sure what to expect from her, but it definitely wasn’t a scoff, which is what he got. He frowned slightly. Everyone else was still reeling about their rooms. Except for Panuk, of course, who hadn’t left Katara’s side, and was still holding her hand.

“What?” Zuko asked. Katara stared at him as if he should know. She stomped off, dragging Panuk in tow who shrugged and said ‘women, am I right?’ which Zuko did not care for.

The breakfast table was laid out with teas, fruits, and various meats. It was a little over the top, but Zuko’s crew was excited to help him entertain.

“Is breakfast always like this in the Fire Nation?” Panuk asked, already in a mild food coma. The truthful answer was no, it wasn’t, but not because it couldn’t be. Zuko just didn’t like all the fuss. Zuko liked the way it felt to have Panuk jealous of him.

“It doesn’t have to be, but it is preferable.” Zuko knew he sounded like a jerk.

“Wow, it must cost the Fire Nation a lot of money to feed you like this,” Panuk said. It had been a trap to make Zuko out to be a bad guy.

“Well, not every breakfast is like this, but bigger feasts require planning and staff which provides jobs. Buying from local merchants stimulates the economy, and as the Fire Lord, I enjoy helping my people in any way I can.”

“As the Fire Lord, you—“ Panuk was cut off by Katara, slamming her hands on the tabletop.

“We get it! Zuko is the Fire Lord, Spirits!” Katara pushed herself off of the table and stormed off, presumably to her room. Everyone stared at Zuko awkwardly.

“I, uh… I guess I’ll go see what that was about.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not really fic related but go listen to Peace by Taylor Swift and tell me it's not a Zutara song from the POV of Zuko. Also idk if anyone wants to but follow me on tumblr so we can be friends @starkbuckyscoffee it's really just a clusterfuck of things i like and i don't use it seriously but it's still fun so... anyway enjoy!


	9. Duty and Honor Despise Happiness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like the last chapter was a lot of filler so enjoy an extra chapter!

For the third time that week, Katara was fuming. She hated the lack of control she felt when she was angry. There were so many different things Katara was upset about that she barely knew where to begin calming herself down. She was pissed that her tribe had sent Panuk as a suitor. She was pissed that, despite not seeing her in over 8 years, he thought that he had some claim over her because they kissed once as kids and because it was the will of the tribe. She was pissed that he thought the way into her good graces was to lean over during Zuko’s tour and make fun of him. She was pissed that Zuko was acting like a royal pain.

“Ugh!” Katara yelled, flinging herself onto the bed. She placed her head in her hands and rubbed her temples, working through the tension in her forehead. She just wanted a fun vacation with her friends, not to be stuck in the middle of a testosterone war as the prize to be won.

_ Knock, Knock.  _

“What?” Katara yelled.

“Kat, it’s me, can I come in?” Zuko asked. Katara felt her outer shell melt momentarily at the sound of his broken voice. He seemed upset. Katara didn’t respond. She wasn’t sure she wanted to talk to anyone. “I just want to know that you’re alright. We can talk later if you prefer, or not at all.” Katara’s heart betrayed her because a small smiled had formed at her lips, and she was speaking before she knew it.

“You can come in, Zuko.”

Zuko opened the door slowly. Katara gave him a sad, tight-lipped smile from her place on the bed.

“Do you mind if I sit?” Zuko asked. Katara gestured for him to sit. She could see two sections of hair threatening to spill from his topknot that she wanted to slick back into place. She restrained herself, knowing that it was no longer her place to touch him like that. “I don’t know what happened out there, but I think it’s partially my fault, and I’m sorry.”

Katara sighed, “You were acting like a real prick, Zuko. That wasn’t like you. You were pompous. And arrogant. And rude.” Katara wanted to say that he was acting like his sister, but she didn’t want to hurt him like that, she just wanted him to understand. “You reminded me of how you were when we first met, and it scared me a little bit.” Zuko winced. “I know why you were acting that way, but it still hurt to see it. I’m… We agreed to be friends, but you weren’t acting like a friend out there. You were showing off because you were jealous.”

Katara was harsh, but she needed Zuko to understand. He bowed his head and squeezed his eyes shut.

“I’m so sorry, Katara. I didn’t mean to… How I acted was childish. I’m really sorry I upset you.” Katara squeezed his hand but didn’t let it linger.

“I know, Zuko. To be honest, I’m really not that upset with you. I mean, I am, but you’re not the one I’m really upset with.” Zuko looked at her with a confused expression.

“Panuk?” Zuko asked.

“Yes, and no.” Katara could tell he was even more confused. “My tribe wants to see me married. I think they have good intentions overall, but in their furious attempt to see me married, they continuously ignore my wishes. I’ve repeatedly told them that I’d marry when I was ready. More importantly, I said I’d marry who I wanted, not who they wanted. I know that I hold a prominent position in our tribe as the master water bender and as a peace ambassador. A politically arranged marriage makes sense, but that’s not what I want for me.

“They sent Panuk here with my brother to test the waters. They sent him here to see if I’d warm to the idea of marriage with him. It makes sense, me, and him. Our marriage would further connect the two water tribes. I don’t think Panuk knows that I know, but I do,” Katara said as she stared at her hands in her lap.

“Do you like him like that?” Zuko asked. Katara could hear the fear and anxiety in his voice.

“I don’t know. I suppose I might, one day. I just don't want to think about that during my vacation. I wanted to have fun with you guys and spend a few weeks pretending I'm someone who doesn't have responsibilities. I just wanted to be me again. Do you know what I mean?” Zuko nodded. Katara was sure he understood better than anyone. “Also, Panuk seems to think that the best way to win my heart is by undermining you with passive-aggressive comments, but they just make me angrier. Even if there wasn’t… whatever between us, why does he think making fun of my friends would be a good idea?”

“Because he’s a jackass,” Zuko quipped. Katara sent him a disapproving look. “Sorry, a force of habit.” Zuko put his hands up in defense.

“I’m just angry at my tribe right now. I’m sorry I took it out on you.”

“I understand, Katara. I mean, I’m in an oddly similar position. You already know that my advisors were hoping I’d marry Mai. After that went by the wayside, they spent the past year or so attempting to find me a suitable bride.”

“And you don’t have any say in the matter?” Katara asked. “I’d assume that as Fire Lord, you could have anyone you wanted.”

“Not anyone.” Zuko’s eyes burned into hers. She didn’t need to be reminded. “But yes, I do have some say, but it’s still not fun to be treated as a reproductive device. I can’t even imagine what that’s like for a woman.”

“And I can’t imagine what it’s like for the Fire Lord, but I’d imagine we are in similar situations. 

Zuko shrugged. “The Fire Lord needs an heir at some point, I guess, but it doesn’t seem to be as pressing to my people as it is to yours.” 

Katara thought about that, and something told Katara he was lying. He may be the Fire Lord, he may be able to subdue the frenzy for longer than her, but at some point, they’d require his marriage. She hoped he’d find someone before that. Zuko, more than anyone Katara knew, deserved to love and to be loved. 

Katara looked around at the room she was in. The bed was huge. It was larger than any bed she had ever slept on, and it was adorned with a red blanket and gold satin sheets. Above the bed were curtains which could be drawn closed. There was a big vanity accented with gold. It was so much fancier than all the other rooms. The room was more feminine than them, too. The bedroom was intimidating, but it made her feel powerful. Katara had a sickening feeling in her gut. If Zuko was in the room meant for the Fire Lord and Lady, then this room was...

“Zuko, is this Azula’s room?” Katara hoped he’d say no. 

“What? No! I mean, I guess technically, yes,” Zuko said sheepishly. Katara was as confused as she was nervous. “If this were Ozai’s ship, this would’ve been Azula’s room.” Katara didn’t miss the way Zuko called him ‘Ozai,’ and not, ‘father.’ “Rooms like this belong to the firstborn.” 

“But you’re older than Azula?” Katara was even more confused.

“Yeah, but in the Fire Nation, the eldest child is synonymous with the favorite child. If this were Ozai’s ship, this room would’ve belonged to Azula, not me, but it’s my ship. One day this room will belong to my child.” 

Katara smiled, thinking of mini Zuko’s running around. “Aw, so this room will belong to Zuko Junior one day!” Zuko ducked his head. 

“I’ve kind of always envisioned this room belonging to a daughter. My family has never had the best luck in father-son relationships.” Somehow, Zuko could break Katara’s heart without trying. 

Katara placed her hand over Zuko’s, but his time she left it there. “Zuko, you are not your father, or your father’s father, or his father. You can end the cycle of abuse, and I know you will. You’re going to be a great dad one day. Your kids are going to be so loved, and they’ll be able to speak their mind without fear. Everything you were denied from your father, you will give so freely."

Zuko looked like he was about to cry. Katara rarely saw Zuko so vulnerable, and she knew that she got to see his vulnerabilities more than most. She often forgot how much insecurity and shame he harbored, and she knew that that’s how he wanted it. He didn’t want people to see the banished prince who was abused by his father. He wanted people to see the poised Fire Lord, who was strong and brave and made morally upright decisions. Katara thought that he could be both, or maybe that he had to be both. Without his past hardships, he wouldn’t be him, and Karata thought he was one of the world’s best people.

“I don’t know about that, but thank you anyway,” Zuko said. He squeezed her hand. 

“I do,” Katara smiled. “You were the perfect mix of fun and discipline when you were Aang’s fire bending teacher!” Zuko cracked a laugh that made Katara smile even though she was still filled with anger. Their hands remained pressed together. Katara tentatively rested her head on Zuko’s shoulder just to let him know… Well, she didn’t know what exactly, but based on the way he let out a content sigh, she was sure he knew. 

“Look, Katara, about Panuk: I’m not telling you that you shouldn’t give him a chance, even though that’s what I want to be saying. I’m just saying that you shouldn’t force yourself to be with him because you think you should be. I want to see you be selfish for once. You’re always putting other people ahead of yourself,” Zuko said.

“I know, but I have duties to my people.” Katara was sick of thinking about her duties, but she couldn’t escape them, even though she’d tried. 

“Katara, you’re the most honorable person I know, but you don’t owe anyone in this life anything. Be content with yourself, and if the tribal elders don’t think you on your own are good enough, well, screw them.” 

Katara laughed and flung her arms around Zuko. The hug was awkward as they were still sitting on the bed. His shoulder hit her chest too hard, and her sides hurt from twisting, but as she breathed in the smell of his skin, she couldn’t be bothered to care. Her eyes squeezed shut. She was too happy to be in his arms. Katara knew that she needed to please her people by at least attempting to like Panuk, and she knew that as long as she felt this happy with Zuko, that was something she couldn't do. 

She then said something she was almost sure she’d regret. 

“Zuko, I think we need to give each other some space, at least until Panuk leaves,” Katara bit her lip as Zuko searched her face for an answer. “I just… I need to figure things out with him, and I can’t do that when I’m with you. My heart betrays what my mind knows is best for the tribe, and no matter how much I care for you, my people will always come first.” 

Zuko was silent for a long time. His face did not change, but Katara could tell that he was attempting to process what she said. She hoped he'd understand that while this was right, it wasn't what she wanted. 

“Zuko finally spoke. "As I said, you’re one of the most honorable people I know. If that’s what you need, and what you think is right, I’ll do it."

“Really?”

“Really, I promise to be on my best behavior while Prince Pompous is here.” Katara stared at him, broken and upset, and he shared the look. He smiled sadly at her. Why did fulfilling her duties always hurt her and the people she cared about? “Let’s go back to our friends, they’re probably worried.” 

Katara followed Zuko back to their friends, and Katara wondered if she and Zuko were still friends. Were they ever friends?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is a lot of Angst and tbh there is even more coming but I promise it'll get happy eventually lol


	10. Conversations Left Unsaid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your support and feed back I cannot believe over 100 people have left Kudos omg

As it turned out, Zuko wasn’t very good at being on his best behavior. He didn’t know how to give Katara her space without completely ignoring her. He realized that their friendship had never been just a friendship. He could barely stand to be in the same room with her without staring at her longingly. He couldn’t smile, or joke, or even make citreous conversation without wanting to touch her shoulder or tease her just to cause a reaction, so he just stopped talking to her. It wasn’t very mature of him, but if Zuko actually cared about her the way he said he did, Zuko knew that he had to let her go and figure out her feelings. 

It wasn’t easy, though. 

While he understood why she wanted—needed—space, it hurt him. When they arrived back at breakfast, Zuko quickly took his seat next to Sokka and sipped his tea. He didn’t make eye contact with anyone. He could feel their eyes fluttering between him and Katara. Aang was the one who spoke first. 

“Uh... Is everything okay?” He pondered awkwardly. Zuko shut his eyes, somehow hoping that if he couldn’t see them, the whole situation would disappear. 

“Yes, fine,” Katara spoke. “I’m just overtired, I think. You guys know that I value this time away from our responsibilities, and all the Fire Lord talk just pushed me over the edge. I’m sorry for exploding.” Zuko admired Katara’s ability to take responsibility for her actions, even if they were justified. The group forgave her quickly. Zuko snuck just one glance at Katara at that breakfast, and he regretted it immediately. Although he couldn’t hear Panuk, he could tell he was apologizing to Katara. Panuk placed a soft kiss on Katara’s temple, and the rosy pink shade her cheeks turned was enough to make Zuko want to hide for the rest of the boat ride. 

And he did try to. 

He spent all of the first day in his office. He claimed that a messenger hawk had brought him news from the Fire Nation and that he had business to attend to if he wanted to enjoy the time on Ember Island. It wasn’t a complete lie, he did have things to do, but he certainly could’ve breezed through it all in one afternoon. Instead, Zuko spent time sulking in his study. 

_ Three days,  _ Zuko reminded himself. It was only for three days. 

* * *

By day two, Zuko was terribly bored with locking himself away. He saw his friends at meals, but it wasn’t really enough. He was already lonely in the Fire Nation, he didn’t need to feel alone with his friends a few doors down from him. He swallowed his pride and made his way to the deck, where he found Aang, Toph, and Sokka playing with a hacky sack. The sound of their laughter made his worries begin to melt. Suki sat with Panuk at a table Zuko's staff had set up. Katara was missing, but there was a chair for her next to Panuk. When his friends saw him appear from the stairwell, a chorus of overjoyed “Zuko’s” rang out. He smiled shyly, already feeling guilty about being distant. 

“You down to play, Sparky? Or are you too busy?” Toph’s wicked smile was challenging Zuko to play, not degrading him for his “responsibilities.” He loved that his friends never let Zuko's title get in the way of their fun. 

“I suppose I can spare a few minutes, so long as you’re willing to make things a little interesting.” Suko created a flame in his hands. Sokka, Aang, and Toph’s smiles grew as they understood what he was inferring. 

“Alright! Flaming hot hacky sack! Or should we call it, flaming sack?” Sokka asked. 

Suki snorted, “Please don’t call it that.”

Zuko lit the bean sack on fire and kicked it lightly in the air towards Aang. Laughter flowed between the four as they tossed around the flaming ball. It felt good to be with his friends. His dimly lit office encased him in his thoughts. He wallowed in his feelings there until they drowned him in insecurity. Out here, he could breathe. 

The ball which had remained airborne for quite some time flew into his shoulder after a harsh kick from Sokka. It burned his robe. As embers cascaded down towards his feet, a few landed on the curtails of his robe, leading the embers to turn into a small flame. He attempted to stomp it out, but a splash of water hit his legs before he could. He looked up to see Katara holding a patcher of what looked to be iced tea in one hand, and the other dripping from bending water. 

“Really, guys? Flaming hacky sack? Are you dumb or just irresponsible?” Katara asked, but she didn’t seem angry. 

“Can’t we be both?” Toph asked. Zuko rang the excess water from his robe. Katara poured each of them a glass of tea. 

“Hi, thanks,” Zuko mumbled as he took the drink. Katara furrowed her brows back at him. She seemed angry. 

“Sure.” Her response was sharp enough to cut glass. Zuko suddenly felt unwelcome. He brought his tea to the edge of the boat and looked out across the water. Behind him, he could hear his friends joking around. The sun was beginning to lower towards the horizon, causing a faint orange glow to begin. Zuko watched the wake of the boat create rainbows in the air. Someone approached him; it was Aang. 

“Hotman,” Aang raised his glass as a salutation. 

“Hotman,” Zuko returned the gesture with a smile.

“Are things alright in the Fire Nation? You seem pretty busy.”

“It’s fine. I just have a lot of paperwork to fill out. I guess there was word of a possible vigilante group attempting to terrorize some of our villages on the outskirts of Caldera,” Zuko lied. How was he supposed to tell Aang that nothing was wrong, he was just sulking because the girl everyone liked might not like him back? Aang had handled Katara's rejection better, hadn't he? 

“Anything I can go to help?” Aang asked. 

“No, Aang. This is an internal issue; I don’t think the Avatar will be much help.” If only Aang knew just how internal Zuko’s issues were.

“What about just Aang? Sometimes I’m offering my help as a friend, not the Avatar,” Aang replied. Zuko felt a chill creep up his spine that was simultaneously comforting and terrifying.  _ A friend.  _ Why was it easy to see them as friends when they needed him, but nearly impossible to let them be friends when he needed them? 

“Thanks, Aang,” Zuko put his hands on his shoulder for a small squeeze before returning it back to his glass. It was then that he realized his hands were shaking. He took a few deep breaths to try and calm his nerves. 

“So, maybe I can’t help with the issues in the Fire Nation, but what about things going on in your personal life?” 

“How do you mean?”

Aang sighed deeply. 

“What’s wrong with you and Katara?" He asked. The tea Zuko had been drinking got lodged in his throat. 

“What are you talking about?” Zuko choked out. “Nothing’s wrong.”

“You’re both in a bad mood, and you won’t even look at each other,” Aang started. Zuko wasn’t sure how to respond. He looked out onto the rolling waves. Aang continued, “the two have always had a special bond that the rest of us don’t have. I’ve always been jealous of that, especially when we were kids.” Zuko had to stifle a laugh, thinking about how jealous he used to be (and sometimes still is) of Aang and Katara’s friendship. “Things between you two were different after the fight with your sister. I don’t even know if you’re aware of it, but you feed off one another. You fight better when you’re together, and you’re happier, calmer even when you’re together. I don’t...” Aang trailed off. 

“What?” Zuko asked tentatively.

“I used to think it was because of what happened during the Agni Kai. That was pretty traumatic for both of you, so a shared bond wouldn't be surprising, but anymore I'm not so sure. I think it's deeper than that. I don’t know if it’s a brother-sister sort of deal, or if it’s something more, but you two have something the rest of us don’t,” Aang finished. 

Zuko’s face burned as Aang implied a relationship between himself and Katara. The group would tease them sometimes, but there was never any earnest inference about there being something more between them. At first, he was glad that Aang didn’t press the issue, but he realized there was no point in hiding the truth that Aang already seemed to know. 

“Do you know why Panuk is here?”

“I’ve put things together, yes.” 

“Then you know why we’re acting off. Katara asked me to give her space, I’m simply abiding by her wishes.” 

“But you’re making each other miserable in the process.”

“Maybe that’s how things are meant to be!” Zuko said sternly. Small balls of heat had formed in his hand, melting the cup he had been holding. Zuko sucked in a sharp breath of air and let go of it quickly, allowing it to be carried out to sea. Katara would’ve gotten mad at him had she seen that. Aang winced. “I’m sorry, Aang. I’m not mad at you, I’m just... trying to figure things out. Things will be better when Panuk leaves.” 

Aang nodded thoughtfully. Zuko didn’t give everything away, but he was sure Aang knew. Zuko was impressed by Aang’s intuition. 

“I think you’re probably right, Zuko. I just want you to be able to be happy without her."

"I can be," Zuko grumbled. It felt like a lie. 

"Look, if you two can end a war together, then you can weather this storm, too,” Aang encouraged. Zuko supposed he was right, but he wondered how much Aang actually knew about his and Katara’s… complicated relationship. They'd gone from enemies to friends, to almost something more, to strangers, back to friends, and now this? It was enough to give Zuko a headache. Still, if the Avatar believed in him, in them, he could too. If there was one thing he and Katara both valued, it was friendship. They’d make it through, even if things weren’t pretty. 

“Thanks, Aang.” Zuko turned around to face the group again to see Panuk holding a cup far above his head and Katara climbing over him to try and grab it. He began tickling her, causing her to shriek and giggle uncontrollably. Right when he thought that things might be okay, the universe had to rip away any hope he thought he had. Maybe he was wrong about their friendship. He was convinced that he wouldn’t be able to watch a lifetime of  _ that, _ even to keep Katara in his life. 

_ I love her, _ Zuko thought suddenly, and he did, didn’t he? Or was he being dramatic again? Zuko couldn’t even read his own emotions. He felt faint. 

“Excuse me,” Zuko said to Aang as he stumbled towards the door that would lead him down to his room. Sounds started to muffle around Zuko. Aang didn’t try and stop him from leaving, but he heard footsteps following him, or was that the sound of his heartbeat? He was sure he heard someone calling after him. He got halfway down the hall to his room before the voice following him shrieked, and his body filled with dread.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I say this every chapter, but I promise that good things come to those who sit through angst!!! I'm also almost done with writing the whole fic (I have like 4 chapters left and they're all planned out), so once I'm done get ready for updates three times a week instead of two!


	11. This Flame's Coldest Shoulder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for 2000+ reads wtf!! I love reading your comments. I love how much y'all hate Panuk lol

“Zuko!” Katara called after Zuko, who was walking remarkably fast for someone who looked like they were about to pass out. “Stop walking away from me!” Katara yelled again. She continued calling his name with no avail. Eventually, she screamed, fed up with his behavior. It was childish, but it worked. Zuko stopped quickly and turned to face her. His face was pale like he’d seen the dead rise in front of him; he seemed surprised it was Katara following him.

“What—” Zuko started to talk, but his knees buckled. He lurched forward as his legs gave way. A gasp escaped Katara’s lips. She ran to him and caught him just before his knees made rough contact with the floor.

“Spirits, Zuko, are you okay?” Katara asked. Zuko didn’t even say thank you. He stood up and attempted to fix his robes.

“Fine,” Zuko muttered.

“Okay, what is your problem?” Katara asked. She was hurt by Zuko’s actions. Even if she asked for space, this isn’t what she wanted. “I asked you to give me space, not to completely ignore me! Why can’t you just be normal?”  _ Was that too harsh?  _

“I don’t know what my normal is around you!” Zuko screamed at Katara, whose eyes went wide. She stood dumbfounded. “I’m sorry I yelled, but shit, Katara, have you ever thought that maybe you and I have never had a normal? I mean, what about our friendship has ever been normal?”

Katara opened her mouth then closed it again. He was right, wasn’t he? She thought back through their friendship, and there was always something there between them that Katara couldn’t quite grasp. They had always been close. Even as enemies, there was an understanding. Something unspoken drew them together and caused a sort of passion, which in the early days resulted in anger, but turned into something else. Whatever it was that connected them, that made them close, also pulled them apart. What did she think “normal” meant? Did she want Zuko to act like Aang? The thought made her face scrunch as if she had just eaten something sour. No, she didn’t want that. Did she want Zuko as something more? Katara was sure she did, but she wasn’t sure she was allowed to have that. She had always kept Zuko at an arm’s length to protect her heart.

“I guess not,” Katara finally said with a defeated sigh. Zuko stepped forward. She could now sense his breath ghosting her forehead.

“Katara, what do you want?” Zuko asked. She stared up at him, unsure how to answer.

“I don’t know,” She replied. She did know, but sometimes things weren’t a matter of black and white. What she wanted and what she knew she needed to do was not the same thing.

“Hmm,” Zuko hummed. He placed a hand out by Katara’s side. She slowly let her hand hover over his, but didn’t allow it to touch his. “I know what I want, but I’d choose your happiness over my wants any day. Though, I don’t think you’re happy right now. I’d be all in if you’d let me, but I know how much you love your people. I’d never ask you to choose between them and me.”

Katara felt Zuko’s hand create a small flame that lightly licked at Katara’s palm. The flare was dim enough to not burn her but hot enough so that she knew it was there. In return, she created a stream of water that intertwined with the flame but did not douse it. He pulled back his hand, allowing the flame to grow, and she returned the gesture. A small, one-foot braid of fire and water spun between their hands. Katara understood: fire and water aren’t always opposite, sometimes they're complimentary. It was them.

“That being said,” Zuko continued, “I think you have a decision to make. Not between Panuk and me, but between what you actually want and what you think you need to do. I can’t make this decision for you, Katara. Neither can Panuk. So forgive me if I distance myself from you, but I want this to be your decision because you think it’s right, not out of guilt or pity.”

“Zuko, I wouldn’t—you know that’s not how I see you, or, us, right?” Katara’s feelings for Zuko were confusing, but she knew that she didn’t like him because of pity. Katara supposed that in the, beginning her feelings developed as a way to want to repay him for saving her life, but they had... developed. 

“How do you see us, Katara?” Zuko was baiting her, she was sure of it. She wanted to give in so much; to close the small gap between them and to see what it would be like to have his lips on hers. Her body ached to feel his arms around her waist and her fingers in her hair. 

But it wouldn’t be right. 

Not with Panuk on the ship. She owed it to her people to be at least polite and dignified towards him. What if he found out she had kissed Zuko while he was here to court her? It would be wrong. There was a loud clang of the door opening. Someone was coming down the stairs to look for them. Katara stepped back, letting the water that had grown bigger in her hand drop to the floor. 

“I’m sorry, Zuko. I can’t. Not now.” Zuko nodded, but she could tell she hurt him. 

“Then you’ll understand if I’m absent,” Zuko whispered. “I want you to be happy, Katara. Even if it means I’m not.” Zuko dropped the flame in his hand and turned away from Katara. Once again, she was left hurting the people she cared about. A single tear fell from her eye as she watched Zuko walk away.

“Katara? Is everything alright?” Panuk asked from behind her. He had been the one to come looking for them. Of course. Katara bent the tear off of her face and turned around to face Panuk with a sweet, incredibly fake smile on her face.

“Absolutely! Zuko just gets a little seasick sometimes. When we were younger, I used to use my water bending to help.” It concerned Katara how easy it was for her to lie to Panuk.

“Did it help this time?” Panuk asked.

“Yeah,” Katara breathed out. Panuk extended his hand for Katara to take. His hands were calloused form sailing. They were cold like hers. Her hands fit into his well enough, and she felt comfortable. It wasn’t anything like holding Zuko’s hand. She cast a glance over her shoulder. Zuko wasn’t there anymore. When she turned her head around, Panuk was watching her. She gave him a smile she hoped would reassure him that nothing was wrong, but that wasn’t the truth, and she was almost sure he knew it.

Panuk had always been good at reading people, especially Katara. When they were kids, he could always tell if Katara was sad or anxious before even her brother could. He was always kind and chivalrous with her. Throughout the trip, Panuk had been a perfect gentleman. He held doors for her and kissed her cheek. He walked her to her quarters each night. He was attractive, kind, and everything a girl could want in a guy, so why wasn’t Katara attracted to him? She wanted to be. She thought that if she could just force herself to like him, that life would be better. She’d be happy, and her tribe would be satisfied, and she’d be able to put her confusing feelings for Zuko to bed.

* * *

_ Why don’t I like him?  _ Katara asked herself at lunch the next day while she watched Panuk and Sokka joke around. It’d be so easy to be with him, just like it would’ve been easy to be with Aang, but what is easy is rarely what’s right. She had her answer then: things with Panuk would never be. She would finish the day with him, and tomorrow he would leave the ship and head toward the Earth Kingdom. He’d send her a letter detailing his feelings, and she’d have to reject him, which would hurt him and her tribe, but it would be the right thing. A small smile broke across her face.

“What are you smiling at, ‘Tara?” Panuk asked.

“Oh, just thinking about how fun Ember Island will be,”  _ How fun indeed.  _ She’d be able to enjoy her friends again, free from distraction or the shackles of a predetermined wedding that she didn’t ask for. She’d be able to enjoy Zuko if that’s what she wanted. She looked at him as he ate. That’s what she wanted.

“Panuk, you should join us for a few days!” Sokka suggested.

“What?” Katara and Zuko both asked with an equal amount of terror.

“Yeah, there’s room in your home, right Zuko?” 

And  _ Oh _ , Katara could’ve killed her brother right there. If not for not reading the room, or caring to ask how Katara felt, then for just inviting Panuk into Zuko’s home without asking first. It was impolite and put Zuko in an uncomfortable position. Katara watched Zuko stare sadly and Panuk’s hand that was gripping Katara’s hip.

“I guess, yeah. We can make things work,” Zuko mumbled.

“Wow, thank you, Zuko. That’s really gracious of you,” Panuk said. Zuko muttered something of a ‘you’re welcome’ then excused himself, claiming he had more work to attend to, but Katara knew it was a lie. “That’ll be fun, eh ‘Tara? More time together!”

_ Don’t you need to be in the Earth Kingdom or something?  _ Katara wanted to spit, but she held her tongue. Panuk excused himself, saying he wanted to further thank Zuko for his hospitality. Katara was glad to see him go. Her plans, her vacation, her life, was being ruined by her idiot brother, who had no idea what he was doing. Katara scowled at Sokka, but he barely even noticed.

* * *

Zuko felt like this vacation had just been a series of him running away from his feelings. He had sulked away from his encounter with Katara yesterday. If he had mustered up the courage and kissed her, would she have kissed back? 

Zuko stormed towards his office. Zuko could’ve killed Sokka back there. Sokka didn’t even know what he was doing, but still,  _ buddy _ , read the room. Zuko wanted to tell Panuk to piss off so bad, but he couldn’t. Not as the Fire Lord, surely, and definitely not as ‘Just Zuko.’ Not if he didn’t want everyone to know how he felt about Katara. Sometimes he thought their friends knew, and then there were times like these when he was convinced that everyone was too insular to care about his and Katara’s entanglement.

Zuko slumped in his chair. He stared at the picture on his desk: a portrait of him and his mom. He missed her. He wondered about her relationship with his dad. He was sure it was an arranged marriage. It had been loveless for as long as Zuko could remember, but was it always? They had two children together, but that doesn’t mean there was love there. His mother always seemed so unhappy around his father, though that was a popular sentiment. He knew his father would encourage him to ignore his feelings for Katara because she wasn’t Fire Nation. Would his mother encourage him to follow his heart, or would she tell him that sometimes the heart doesn’t get to win? A familiar rapping on the door interrupted his thoughts.

“Come in,” Zuko sighed.

“Fire Lord Zuko, Prince Panuk would like to speak with you,” Ming Lee said. Zuko gestured for Ming Lee to let Panuk in, even though he had half a mind to not. Zuko stood upon Panuk’s entrance.

“Prince Panuk,” Zuko greeted him formally.

“Fire Lord Zuko,” Panuk returned the formality.

“Is there something I can do for you?” Zuko honestly just wanted him to leave.

“There is actually. I want you to leave Katara alone,” Panuk said.

“Excuse me?” Zuko was astonished by Panuk’s brash words.

“I want you to stay away from Katara. All you’re doing is confusing her.”

Zuko angrily replied, “In what way?”

“Do you seriously think you could be together? In what world would that work?”

“Excuse me?” Zuko tried again.

“Your feelings for her are blocking her from realizing her potential with me,” Panuk sneered.

“I don’t—“

“No, you do, and I understand. Katara is quite beautiful, but you’d never work. Guys that look like you don’t get girls that look like her. Especially not when she has a suitor that looks me and will wield just as much power as you one day,” Panuk bragged.

Zuko’s scar burned. He felt ugly. Zuko felt the hands of his insecurities around his throat. Normally he could keep them at bay. The feeling would rest softly at his collar bones, reminding him that no matter what happened, his insecurities could suffocate him. Now his breath was short. With all the strength he had, he spoke.

“Katara’s not like that, Panuk. If you knew her like I do, you’d know that appearances don’t matter to her. Rotting fruits may smell just as sweet, but Katara has a good nose.” Zuko sounded like Uncle Iroh, but he knew he was right. Katara didn’t care about how he looked even if he did. She liked him for him, and that was enough, wasn’t it?

“Maybe so, but she’s Water Tribe, you’re Fire Nation. Katara will never choose you because her people wouldn’t want it, and Water Tribe women always follow their duties. I, on the other hand, am loved by the tribal council. Katara and I make sense, don’t we? We’re cut from the same cloth, her and I. We will be married one day; she will be my wife. You’ll be nothing but a relic in her personal history," Panuk said. Zuko gulped. It was as if Panuk had ripped a page from his personal book of his deepest fears and insecurities.

“Don’t you get it, Panuk? As long as you think of Katara as your property, she’ll never belong to you.” Zuko’s voice was shaky.

“Maybe not emotionally, but she'll legally be my wife and there is nothing either of you can do about it."

"How can you be so sure? You act like Katara doesn't have a say."

"She doesn't. The Tribal Council has plans to offer her an ultimatum. She can either marry me or lose her ambassadorship. Which do you think she’ll choose, Zuko? Lose her dream job, or marry her childhood sweetheart?” Zuko was at a loss for words. “Face it, Zuko, you don’t deserve her. One day the sins of your past will catch up to you, and she’ll see how ugly you really are. Inside and out.

Zuko didn’t speak. He didn’t cry often, but tears threatened to spill over his eyes. He looked away from Panuk as he spoke. “And what if I tell Katara all that you’ve said here?”

“Be my guest. Based on that little fight I overheard yesterday, she’ll see you as nothing but a jealous little boy playing tattletale. Is that how you want her to see you? Accept your defeat, Zuko. You may have the Fire Nation, but I’ll have Katara, and your sad little heart will always belong to her, won’t it? If I have Katara, and your weakness is her, then I’ll have the Fire Nation,” Panuk furthered. 

"And that's what you really want, isn't it? You don't care about Katara, you just want more power!" Zuko spat. 

"Caring for Katara came as a pleasant surprise and bonus. This maybe your ship, but you’ll stay away from Katara if you know what’s good for you.” It was a threat, and Panuk knew he had Zuko by the balls. Panuk walked towards the door with a cocky saunter that made Zuko want to rip a hole in the side of his boat. “Have a nice night, Fire Lord,” Panuk spat. The door slammed behind him.

Zuko screamed. The tears which pooled in his eyes were now spilling over and seeping through the skin on his cheeks. It wasn’t the kind of cry someone could romanticize. It wasn’t poetic or pretty. It was white-hot and ugly. His face burned crimson, and he heaved in the air that shallowly filled his lungs.

Zuko didn’t make it to dinner that night. He spent the time simmering in his study. He repeatedly let his temper boil over thinking of Panuk’s comments. What Panuk said about Katara not liking Zuko anguished him, but what really bothered Zuko was the way Panuk talked about Katara like she the prize kill of a hunt. Panuk’s attitude about Katara, and seemingly women in general, vexed Zuko. 

Zuko spent the evening in an indecisive loop that caused a migraine. He wanted to tell Katara everything: what Panuk said, and how Zuko really felt about her. On the other hand, he feared rejection and Panuk’s retaliation. He had his alliance with the Water Tribes to think about. Panuk really had Zuko right where he wanted him. Zuko found himself longing for his uncle’s calming words of encouragement, and even his seemingly senseless wisdom. Zuko poured himself a tea and penned a letter to Iroh, knowing that he always thought better when he brought his problems out of his own head.

_ Uncle, _

_ You’ve always said that there is nothing a calming cup of tea can’t solve. Well, I think I’ve found a problem that would disagree with that logic. Once, many years ago, you told me that someone special is worth holding onto. I didn’t know who you were referring to then, but I do now. I won’t say her name for fear of interception, but I know you know. You always said what a marvelous young lady she is. You told me that people can be judged by the company they keep and the tea they drink, and you liked her for both. I think I love her, and that terrifies me. I’m not terrified of love. I’m terrified of losing her if I try to ask for her love in return. What’s worse is I think she loves me too, but her loyalties lie outside the Fire Nation, and I can’t ask her to give them up, can I? Even still, I think about it. She is expected to marry someone less than pleasant who I must maintain a relationship with for the sake of good international relations. If I weren’t the Fire Lord would love be so hard? I’d give this all up if it meant I could have her. She’d hate that, though, and I know you’d tell me that a love that asks you to change is not worthy of your time. I don’t know what to do, Uncle. I need your counsel now more than ever. Shall I speak and risk the rejection, knowing that I can’t live without her, or do I remain silent, knowing that I can’t live without trying?  _

_ Zuko _

Zuko's path became clear as he wrote the letter to his uncle. Zuko had to tell her what he knew. If nothing else, she deserved the truth from him. He wasn’t ready to say the three infamous words yet, but that was just because he knew she wasn’t ready to hear them. In his heart, he knew it was true. Zuko sent the letter off with his messenger hawk and bounded towards the deck, taking the stairs two at a time. He knew Katara would be up there. She couldn’t resist a starry night and salty air. He didn’t know how to tell her everything, but he hoped the words would come to him when the time was right.

He rounded a corner to find the door to the deck propped open. As he stepped outside, the chilly sea air nipped at his skin and whipped through his hair. The salt which existed in the small particles in the air stung the tear stains on his cheeks. He heard voices that made him stop where he stood. He peered his head around the corner to see Katara and Panuk standing against taffrail.

“You’re so beautiful, Katara,” Panuk said. He ran a hand through Katara’s hair, and she blushed. Zuko felt that horrible, twisting feeling in his stomach again. 

Panuk was  _ so _ good at the bullshit.

“Thank you, Panuk,” Katara replied. “You’ve become so handsome. Not that I didn’t think that you were cute when we were kids, but you’re definitely not the scrawny little boy you used to be.” Panuk flexed at her comment, and she giggled, placing a hand on his bicep. Zuko looked down at his arms that were toned and defined but small in comparison.  _ Is that what Katara wants?  _ Zuko shook his head. Katara could see through Panuk, he was sure of it.

“Katara, I need to be honest with you,” Panuk began. Zuko’s ears perked up. Maybe Zuko wouldn’t have to expose Panuk at all. “I was sent here by the Tribal Council to see if you’d warm to the idea of marriage.” Panuk paused as if waiting for Katara to react. She didn’t, so he continued. “I felt weird about it. I didn’t even want to come, but I’m so glad I did. I didn't think I'd be able to love again after, well, it doesn't matter, but I’ve completely fallen for you over the last few days.”  _ Bullshit.  _

“Panuk, I like you, I really do, and if it’s the will of the Tribal Council, then I should try, right?” Katara asked. 

Zuko shut his eyes tightly; he wanted to scream. When he opened his eyes, Panuk was leaning in to kiss Katara. Zuko didn’t wait around to catch a glimpse of the show. The feeling of suffocating came skidding back.

He had been too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i changed the rating for this fic after re-reading the descriptions of the ratings and after editing some later chapters because, well, adult themes are coming. i didn't write anything super explicit (though i still might do a an x-rated outtake) but still there are explicit references and and situations so... i guess proceed with caution if that isn't your thing! Also i posted a say early again because tomorrow is my birthday and I dont wanna think about this hahahaha


	12. Hell Hath No Fury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all your support on this. Your comments always make me cackle. Speaking at the president and CEO of the "I hate Panuk" club... i hate panuk lmaoooo

Everyone had gone to bed already, but Katara wasn’t tired, not by a long shot. She was mentally exhausted, and she had barely slept. However, the anxiety she felt after her fight with Zuko kept her jittering at all hours. She wondered where he had been during dinner. Ming Lee said he would be “enjoying dinner in his office as he attends to an important Fire Lord responsibility,” but Katara didn’t believe that. Zuko always made time for meals with friends. She wondered if he was still avoiding her. It would make sense.

Panuk had been so kind to her at dinner. He wasn’t pushy, or rude, or overly affectionate. He was just… Panuk. Not  _ Prince  _ Panku _ ,  _ but  _ her  _ Panuk _. _ The one she had known as a kid. Part of Katara knew it was because Zuko wasn’t there, so Panuk wasn’t putting on a show.  _ If I go along with the charade, is this what our life would be like?  _ It didn’t sound all that terrible. It lacked passion, sure, but it was safe, and it was what her people wanted.

Hours ago, she had decided to reject Panuk, but that was when she thought he was leaving in the morning; when she believed she could reject him by messenger hawk. Now, with an undetermined amount of days with him, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to say no to his face. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to. If he acted the way he did tonight, it wouldn’t be such a horrible thing to be with him. Comfort over risk, right?

_ Ugh, why am I going back on my decision?  _

Katara sighed as she stared up at the glittering summer stars. They twinkled and danced across the navy night sky and brought Katara a sense of belonging in the universe. They were always her happy place. When she was sad as a kid, her mother would bring her out onto the ice flats and point out constellations. She’d make up stories about the stars which always centered around Katara as a hero. Now, on nights like this one, where her mind was clouded with anger and uncertainty, she found the stars whispered answers to the questions she wasn’t even sure had answers.

She was unbelievably angry with her brother for extending Panuk’s invite. It angered her more that there was no way for her to address it. Sokka technically didn’t do anything wrong. She wished Zuko would show up to talk to her. She knew he was hurting too. She wanted him to wrap his arm around her shoulder and start teasing her about how his sister may be an egomaniac in jail, but she had the worse sibling. They’d both laugh, knowing Zuko loved Sokka like a brother, and then maybe if she was feeling brave, she’d lean her head on his shoulder, and he’d press a kiss to the crown of her head. It would be so innocent and so intimate. The thought alone was enough to prepare herself for a wet dream.

_ Choosing him should be easy. Why can’t it be him? _

“You’ll get sick if you’re out here all night with no one to keep you warm,” Panuk said from behind her, startling her and causing her to yelp. “You’re cute when you’re frightened,” Panuk said. Katara didn’t like the way his voice changed when he said that.

“Hi,” She whispered. Panuk joined her against the railing.

“What are you doing out here all alone?”

“Just enjoying the night air. The sea breeze and the moon always calm me down.”

“Yeah, me too,” Panuk said, staring sadly at the moon. Katara wondered if he thought of Yue when he looked at the moon like she did, or if they even knew each other. “What are you thinking about?” Panuk inquired. He stroked Katara’s forearm in a way that made Katara’s skin tingle.

“My mom, mostly,” Katara answered, shifting her weight from one foot to the other, a tell-tale sign she was lying if you knew what to look for. “and home.”

“You’re so beautiful, Katara.” Panuk ran a hand through Katara’s hair, and she blushed involuntarily. What a weird point in the conversation to start hitting on her.

“Thank you, Panuk. You’ve become so handsome.” Katara realized it sounded like she was saying he used to be ugly. She quickly covered, stating, “Not that I didn’t think that you were cute when we were kids, but you’re definitely not the scrawny little boy you used to be.”  _ Spirits, what am I saying.  _ Panuk  _ was _ attractive, there was no way to deny that, but why did the words feel wrong?

Panuk flexed his arm humorously. For a moment, Katara forgot the façade of the situation. She was brought back to a time before he was the crown prince of the Northern Water tribe, and she was a prominent political figure. They were just Panuk and Katara again. She laughed and grabbed his muscle like she did when they were kids. It almost felt normal. 

“Katara, I need to be honest with you.” Katara’s blood ran cold. “I was sent here by the Tribal Council to see if you’d warm to the idea of marriage.” Panuk paused. Katara assumed he wanted her to react as if she had heard brand new information, but that wasn’t what was happening. Katara was feeling more nauseous by the second. “I felt weird about it. I didn’t even want to come, but I’m so glad I did. I didn't think I'd be able to love again after..."  _ After who? " _ Well, it doesn't matter, but I’ve completely fallen for you over the last few days.” 

Katara was stunned. The full context of her situation with Panuk was back to being the only thing she could see when she looked at him. In the dim lighting, he looked so charming, but her insides didn’t agree. She was attracted to him but wasn’t at the same time. Katara didn’t even know that was possible.  _ Why can’t I make up my damn mind? _ She had to try with him. She owed it to herself and to her people to at least try, and really try. Not pretend to try like she had been doing. 

“Panuk, I like you, I really do, Katara started. Panuk smiled like he’d won her over. “And if it’s the will of the Tribal Council, then I should try, right?”

Panuk grabbed her waist and pulled her in roughly. She gulped. Maybe it’d be a good kiss.

It wasn’t.

Panuk smashed his lips onto hers before she could close her eyes or tilt her head. His nose flattened into hers, causing an uncomfortable sensation. Katara swore that she felt her teeth clank against his. She was repulsed. It was like kissing a brother. It was enough to solidify the fact she didn’t like him like that, and she never could. She pulled back as quickly as she could.

“I’m sorry, Panuk. I can’t do this.” Katara turned her body away from his and towards the railing again. She bowed her head in shame.

“It’s because of the Fire Lord, isn’t it?”

“What?” Katara screeched.

“Spirits, Katara, I don’t understand what you see in him. You’re Water Tribe, he’s Fire Nation. It’d never work.” Panuk leaned against the railing coolly.

“This has nothing to do with Zuko!” But it did. It had everything and nothing to do with him.

“Oh? Then what is this about then?” Panuk chided.

“I just don’t have feelings for you that way. I thought maybe kissing you would change that, but it didn't. It's not fair that I pretend and lead you on."

“And you’re going to tell me that has nothing to do with the Fire Lord?” Panuk raised an eyebrow at Katara as if he was challenging her.

“What is your hang-up with Zuko?” Katara asked, throwing her hands up in the air. She was beyond irritated, and ready for what she knew was leading to a fight to be over soon, she egged him on by asking, “Are you jealous?"

"Of course, I'm jealous. Clearly, he's in love with you, and he doesn't deserve you. I do, though." Katara wasn't sure about that one. 

"Wow, Zuko really makes you insecure, huh?"

“Please, like someone that looks like that could make me insecure,” Panuk laughed with an unemotional grin.

“You’re a real jerk, Panuk.”

“Maybe so, but our people sent me here to marry you, and I’m going to fulfill my duties whether you like it or not because that's what good Water Tribe members do." Panuk’s voice was chilling. Briefly, Katara worried for her safety, but she remembered who she was and what she was capable of.

“Our _ people _ ,” Katara snapped. She took a step back. “Sent you here as a courtesy to see if I’d take to the idea of marriage with you. Don’t kid yourself into thinking that I’m already yours because our people want it. I don’t want it, and that’s what matters. You’ve already fulfilled your duties; you can go now.” Katara turned her body slightly away from his. 

“I’ve been promised you, Katara. You might as well make things easier on yourself and learn to like it.” Panuk’s hand lightly pet her shoulder and upper arm. Katara fumed. How dare he assume she was going to roll over and show her belly so easy.

“You’ve been  _ promised _ me? I’m the only person who can promise myself to anyone, and I certainly didn’t promise myself to you. I’m not going to marry you, Panuk. Not now, not ever.” Katara was done.

“If you don’t marry me, then they’ll revoke your ambassadorship,” Panuk hissed.

Katara’s heavy breathing stopped. She held a large sum of air in her lungs, afraid that if she breathed, it would be taken as exasperation. Was he telling the truth? Her tribe wouldn’t… would they? The smug look on Katara’s face made her realize that if he was being truthful, then maybe it was meant to be. She loved her people, but if they didn’t trust her to make her own decisions in her personal life, why did they trust her to make decisions for the tribe? Why did she want to continue to be an ambassador for people who didn’t respect her? She wondered if they knew how horrible Panuk really was. Her lip quivered, thinking of the people who would one day be led by this asshole. Panuk looked at Katara like he knew he was winning.

She furrowed her brows and stood a bit taller. Her fists clamped involuntarily. “Then, so be it.”

“You don’t mean that, Katara. Besides, I know how much water bending means to you. It’d be a shame if the only master water bender of the Southern Water Tribe was unable to pass down the traits. How do you expect to create new water benders if you don’t marry another member of the water tribe?”

“In case you forgot, Panuk, you’re not a bender,” Katara snapped. “I’d have just as much of a chance producing water benders with you as I would someone from the Earth Kingdom.”  _ Fire Nation.  _ “The ability to bend does not belong to one nation, and just because I won’t marry you doesn’t mean that I won’t marry someone from the water tribe. And furthermore,  _ my children’s  _ bending abilities, or lack thereof, are none of your business because they won’t be  _ your children. _ ”

“So you’re really willing to throw everything away for Salami Face, huh?”

“Tui’s gills, there you go again, bringing up Zuko. He may be the one with the scar, but deep down, you’re the ugly one, Panuk."

"How can you love him after everything he's done to our tribe? What about Yue?"

"I’ll remind you again that Yue's death was  _ not _ Zuko's fault. This has nothing to do with Zuko, and everything to do with your entitlement. You think you own me? You don’t. I owe you nothing. I want you off this ship, first thing tomorrow. Zuko may be a hospitable and reluctantly gracious host, but I’m not so giving. I don’t care what lie you have to come up with as a reason to leave unannounced, but you will be gone in the morning.”

Katara’s reasoning was firm. She was so angry she was pretty sure she’d be able to bend fire if Panuk kept pushing her.

“And if I’m not? What are you gonna do? Sick the Fire Lord on me? Yeah, that’ll go over well. Zuko attacking me will be viewed as an act of war, and is that what you want? Your little boyfriend ruining a time of peace?”

Katara let out a frustrated shriek. She pulled water from the air and turned it into small ice blocks. She threw the ice blocks around Panuk’s throat, creating a kind of noose. He choked for air. She kicked the back of his knees until they buckled, and he was staring at her helplessly. He looked terrified.  _ If only he knew what I can do with blood. _

“The Fire Lord is  _ not _ the one you should be afraid of. Don’t test me.” Katara let the ice drop to the floor. Panuk fell to his hands, choking. Katara started to walk away, sure Panuk had learned his lesson. 

She was wrong.

“Oh, Stupid Girl. So long as you’re a member of the Water Tribe, you’ll belong to me.”

Without looking, Katara encased Panuk’s hands and feet in ice blocks, which she froze to the deck. She whipped around and glared at him.

“I don’t belong to anyone! Not you, or Zuko, or even the Southern Water Tribe. I’m a person, not an object. If I choose to be with someone, I’ll be with someone who treats me as such. I don’t care what the tribe thinks anymore. They clearly don’t respect my opinion, why should I respect their wishes?”

“You play with fire, and you get burned. Trust me, Katara. You don’t understand how difficult you’re making your future by doing this. I’ll make your life a waking nightmare.”

Katara rolled her eyes. Even after frozen to the deck, he still thought he had something over her. Typical. “Have a nice trip back to the North Pole.”

_ A force to be reckoned with indeed,  _ Katara thought as she remembered her dad’s warning about marrying just anyone. Katara was sure by the animalistic whine that escaped Panuk’s throat that he had learned his lesson, but for good measure, she decided to let time take care of the ice blocks that solidified Panuk on all fours to the deck.

Her thoughts were still muddled, but she knew one thing: the fight with Panuk showed her what she really wanted, and that “thing” was sulking in his room right now. 


	13. Treacherous Territory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, the moment we've all been waiting for! This chapter has more... adult themes ;) I also wrote a NSFW outtake that follows this chapter (i'll link it at the end) but you don't need to read it if you don't like smut! I wrote it so you wouldn't miss anything by not reading it! I cannot believe over 3000 people have read this, thank you all so much!!

Katara was still fuming as she stormed down the iron staircase. Her face and body felt hot. Panuk was a horrible person; Katara was sure of that. The way he spoke about her like she was his property, like she owed him something just because of his status, made Katara want to scream. But how much of that was his individual thought, and how much was influenced by the Tribal Council? She couldn’t believe that Panuk was the best they could come up with. What about him made the Tribal Council think Katara would find him suitable?

She was angry with Panuk but even angrier with the Tribal Council. Her frustration was merely personified in Panuk. If they wanted to remove her from her position solely because she didn’t want to be trapped in a loveless, abusive marriage, then she didn’t want it. What about her being unmarried made her less capable when it came to peace negotiations? Unless the Tribal Council assumed her heart lay outside of the Water Tribe. It did, didn’t it?

Katara made her way to Zuko’s quarters, where she was greeted by his two personal guards. Katara wanted to push past them, disregarding all forms of decorum, but she remembered that even though the Tribal Council might have her removed as a peace ambassador tomorrow, to everyone on Zuko's ship, she still represented the joint Water Tribes. She put on her best diplomatic face.

“May I please speak to the Fire Lord? It’s important,” Katara asked politely. The guards exchanged a glance that made Katara’s hands feel sweaty.

“I’m sorry, Miss Katara, but the Fire Lord gave us strict orders to not allow any visitors,” The male guard said.

“Please, it’s vital I speak with the Fire Lord. Can you just… tell him that it’s me?” Katara wasn’t sure that would help. “And that it’s about Prince Panuk,” Katara added.

The guards looked at each other. One of them nodded to the other. “I’ll see what I can do, but no promises.”

The female guard placed an oddly rhythmic knock on the door before she opened it. She didn’t wait for Zuko to say she could enter, which struck Katara as odd. Katara heard muffled talking. She stood on her toes to try to see past the guard, but all she saw was the faint warm glow of lanterns. The guard came back out with a smug look, and Katara knew it was bad news. Katara knew that there was a door from her room to Zuko’s, but she had no way of getting through the lock. Here at least she had a fighting chance of getting through both guards.

“I’m sorry, but—” Katara broke through the guards, who both started to scream at her. She slid through the closing wooden door with barely just enough time.

“Zuko!” Katara yelled. He looked up from the chair he had been sitting on. There was a glass of fire whiskey on the table. He didn’t look well.

“Your highness, I’m so sorry! I tried to tell her you didn’t want to speak to anyone!” The female guard said. The male guard restrained Katara’s hands in an attempt to keep her from bending. Zuko put up his hand, and the guard’s grip on Katara loosened.

“It’s okay. Can you give us a moment?” Zuko asked. The guards seemed unsure, but they nodded anyway. The female guard gave Katara a look that pierced through her, then looked back at Zuko longingly. _Does he know his guard has a crush on him? She's_ so _obvious, he must, right?_ Katara felt a pang of jealousy she hadn't been expecting. When the door shut, Katara rubbed her wrists.

“Jeez, rough crowd.”

“Can we make this quick? I’m really not in the mood.”

Zuko placed his hands on his forehead and rubbed away at an invisible ache. He wouldn’t look at Katara. She walked over to him. The glass of Fire Whiskey was nearly empty, but the bottle was over half full. He wasn’t drunk, but Katara knew what drinking alone like this meant.

“Look, Zuko, I wanted to talk to you about Panuk.” Zuko looked up at her with a terrified glaze over his eyes, which were puffy and red. His cheeks were wet and blotchy. Katara gasped. She bent down to his level and brought a hand to his cheek. “Have you been crying?”

Zuko grabbed Katara’s wrist and yanked it away from her face. He stood up, and for the first time since they were kids, Katara was a little afraid of Zuko. He looked so furious, and it seemed to accumulate on her. She stared up into his eyes, her wrist still trapped in his slender fingers.

“Katara, I can’t… we can’t—you can’t keep doing this to me!” Zuko flung Katara’s wrist out of his hand. “You can’t keep stringing me along like this! I know that you don’t mean to, but every time you come to me to complain about Panuk, or to tell me that you want to be friends, it gives me hope that one day we’ll be more than that. I can’t keep doing this with you. It hurts too much.”

“That’s not why I came here.”

“Katara, I think… I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think you should be with Panuk,” Zuko sighed. Katara’s throat felt dry. “You two make sense. You’re... ‘cut from the same cloth,’ you know? You’re Water Tribe, I’m Fire Nation. We would never work.”

Katara was seconds away from crying before she heard Zuko’s last sentence. Those weren’t his words; they were Panuk’s. Panuk had talked to Zuko, maybe even put him up to this. Is that why he had been crying? Katara suddenly felt braver than she had for a long time. She stepped closer to Zuko.

“I just asked Panuk to leave.”

“Wait, what? Why” Zuko questioned. He looked bewildered. Katara had taken him by surprise.

“Well, he really let his true colors show. Turns out, the guy had less than congenial intentions and a foul entitlement problem. It made me realize he was never what I wanted.”

“I don’t understand.”

Katara smiled faintly. Of course, he didn’t. She stared up into his eyes, which burned amber. They were so pretty. Katara could feel herself getting lost in them. _It’s now, or never,_ Katara thought. She grabbed Zuko’s robe and pulled him in. Her lips pressed into his firmly, and _Oh._ Zuko’s hands immediately found the small of her back, and his lips parted to welcome hers. He brought his hand up her back to rest on the back of her head to help deepen the kiss. Her hands were trapped in between their bodies, but she couldn’t be bothered to care. Katara had kissed a fair share of people, but it was never like this. If this was how kissing was supposed to feel, man, she had been missing out.

They both pulled back eventually. Zuko’s hands now rested on her waist. Her hands rested on his chest. A goofy smile was plastered on Katara’s face.

“But I saw you kissing Panuk?” Zuko questioned. So, that’s why he had been crying. Katara made an embarrassed face.

“Actually, you saw Panuk kissing me. It’s a technicality, I know, but it’s important to me that you know that I didn’t initiate that. I wanted to try with him, but my heart always belonged here.”

“He came to talk to me yesterday. He threatened me. He told me I was “confusing you.””

“I was never confused about my feelings. I was conflicted about my duties, but not my feelings. I've known since before Panuk arrived how I felt—feel—about you, but I didn't have the guts to give in. Zuko, I’m so sorry for everything I put you through.”

“It’s not your fault."

“It is, and I’m sorry.” Katara brought her hands up and around Zuko’s neck. She played with the hair at the base of his neck. She loved it when his hair was down like this. It was longer than they were kids. It was just as unruly, though, but the style made it easier for him to put up into a royal topknot. “I cannot believe you brought up Panuk after our first kiss,” Katara laughed. Zuko did too.

“I promise I’ll do better next time.”

“Oh, you think there is going to be the next time? How presumptuous of you,” Katara said, but she was already leaning up to kiss him.

“Shut up,” Zuko barely got out before he pressed his lips to Kataras.

They were warm and soft, and Katara could taste just the faintest hint of Fire Whiskey. The kiss was more intoxicating than any alcohol she had ever tasted, though. She gripped Zuko's hair, and Katara swore he let out a guttural moan. She bookmarked that information in her mind for later. 

Katara deepened the kiss, licking into his mouth. Zuko's hands moved from her waist to around her back. He encased her in his arms and pulled her closer to him. There was no room between them, and somehow Katara wanted more. She needed to catch her breath, but she didn’t want to. Kissing Zuko had to be the best thing she’d ever experienced. Eventually, they pulled back, but barely.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” Zuko breathed out.

“It was worth the wait.” Katara was smiling because it was. Her responsibilities could crush her tomorrow, but right now, she was just so happy. Zuko leaned in to kiss her again. Katara felt her heart rate speed up. Just before his lips pressed hers, he pulled back.

“Katara, what about your ambassadorship?”

“I don’t care,” She stated, moving in to kiss him again. Zuko pulled back.

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do. If the Tribal Council wants to remove me from my position because I refuse to marry a pompous asshole who thinks I’m available to own, then fine. I don’t want to help them,” Katara griped. She felt herself getting angry again. Zuko’s hand rubbed her back, and it calmed her down almost instantly. If she'd known just his touch could calm her down, she would've utilized that years ago. “I do want to help them, but not like that. I don’t want to think about that right now.”

Katara caught Zuko’s lips in her mouth. The kiss was needier and more desperate than their last two. It felt good. Katara was standing on her tippytoes to make the kiss as close as possible. Without breaking the kiss, Zuko bent down and grabbed the back of her legs, hoisting her up so her legs could wrap around his waist. With some struggle, he backed himself up until he found the edge of the bed. He sat down, still holding Katara in his arms. Katara tangled her hands in his hair, afraid that if she let go, the kiss would end too soon.

The air in the room shifted as Zuko’s hands found his way under the top Katara was wearing. The feeling of his hands on her bareback was enough to send Katara into a frenzy. She moved her hands from his hair to his robe and pulled it off his shoulders quickly. Her hands made their way to his back, where she attempted to pull his shirt off over his head, but he stopped kissing her. She sat back on his hips, afraid she had done something wrong.

“Katara, I can’t do this if I’m going to be a mistake for you in the morning.” Zuko sounded so insecure, and it hurt Katara to think that he might think that she thought of him that way.

“I’m risking my position to be here with you, and you think you’re a mistake?”

“I can’t be a lesson you’re attempting to teach your tribe either. I’ve wanted this for too long. I care about you too much. I just can’t.”

“Oh, Sweet Boy,” Katara said, running her fingers through his hair. He leaned into her touch like a kitten. It made her insides squirm. “This isn’t about revenge. I’ve liked you since I was 14 years old.” Zuko’s eyes went wide in shock. Katara nodded to confirm the question he hadn't asked. “I had an incurable crush on you for so long, and you didn’t even give me the time of day. It’s so much more than that now. I fell for the boy who saved me from lightning, and I've continued falling form him, even with all this pretense,” Katara gestured to the royal décor. “Right now isn’t about my tribe, or your nation, or any of that. Tomorrow we can figure out what all of this means, but tonight, it’s just you andme.”

The circles Zuko drew on her hips with his thumb made Katara want to grind down onto him, but she didn’t. It wouldn’t be appropriate… yet.

“I want this, you, so badly,” Zuko said softly. He kissed Katara’s shoulder softly, and Katara stifled a moan. _That’s an interesting sweet spot._

She leaned in to whisper into his ear, “Then take me.”

She kissed the skin directly under his ear and began leaving wet kisses down his neck. His moans only egged her on. She didn’t even care about leaving marks. She’d wanted this for too long to care. She made her way back up to his lips. She stared at him, and he stared back through half-lidded eyes. She ground down on Zuko, who was already halfway to hard. A smile broke out across her face. Zuko flipped them around with ease so that Katara was the one laying on the bed. She scooted herself back so he could climb on top of her. His lips attacked her neck, causing her to moan and whimper.

“Are you sure?” He asked, fiddling with the tie on her top. Katara grabbed his face and pulled him down to kiss her. Each kiss was just as electrifying as the last.

“Yeah,” she whispered.

“Agni, you’re so beautiful, Katara,” Zuko said.

It was the second time she had heard that that night, but it was the first time it had mattered. It was the only time it had ever mattered. Katara was sure that it would never matter again unless it was coming from Zuko’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the link to the outtake for those who want it! Like I said, you absolutely don't have to read it if it makes you uncomfy for whatever reason! The next chapter will pick up right after this one with only slight inferences to the smut, so don't feel like you need to read it :)
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/25863721


	14. Heart Beats Like the Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiii if you didn't read the smutty outtake (and you still want to!!!) you can find it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25863721 and if smut isn't your thing, then enjoy this fluff and tenderness and you didn't miss anything!!!

Zuko didn’t dare move, afraid that even the smallest movement would ruin the moment. He wasn’t even sure he was alive. There was no way what he had experienced was real. He was 90% sure he’d died in his sleep and woken up in the spirit world, and if this was the afterlife, death had been worth it. 

Katara slept soundly next to Zuko. He couldn’t keep his eyes off her. Seeing her sleep next to him, in his own bed, was better than he’d fantasized about. The sight of her breathing peacefully was almost too much for him to handle. Her hair sprawled across the pillow. It took everything not to reach out and run his fingers across her soft, flush face. His heart felt like it was going to burst.

Katara’s chest rose and fell rhythmically. Her exposed breasts, which were littered with red and purple marks, were perky as the morning sea air drifted through the window and blew over them. The silky gold sheets just barely covered both of her hips. One leg peeked out of the covers exposing finger-print shaped bruises that Zuko couldn’t bring himself to be sorry about leaving. Truthfully, he couldn’t bring himself to be sorry for anything that had happened last night. 

_But what if she could?_

With every breath that Katara took, Zuko worried about what her reaction would be when she woke up. What if she regretted it? What if she thought it was a mistake? What if she really was using him to teach her tribe a lesson? _It can’t be_. Zuko thought back to last night, the images and sounds ingrained into his mind. Katara had been so needy and so willing. The small whines, moans, and whimpers which escaped her mouth onto his skin still rang in his ears. She'd initiated it, hadn't she? And even before clothing had been removed, she had wanted him.

Even still, what if she woke up in horror?

She hadn’t wanted to leave last night. Sweat stuck to both of their foreheads as Katara had laid on his chest. She was smiling and giggling and kissing his neck. The memory made a small smile break across his face. Katara had rested her head on his chest and sighed contently. Her eyes drooped, and Zuko had quietly laughed. 

“You know,” Zuko had said. “It’s going to look suspicious if you leave my private quarters looking like this.”

“Are you calling me ugly?” Katara had teased back. 

“I’ve never seen you look hotter, trust me,” Zuko had whispered, and he had meant it. If he hadn’t been wiped out, he’d have been hard again. “It’d be indecent to let others see you like this, though”

“So, I’ll go through the private door,” Katara had reasoned.

“Yeah, that’ll look good," Zuko had practically snorted, "You basically assault my guards to come to talk with me, and then they don’t see you leave? I can only imagine the gossip in the staff quarters tonight.”

Zuko was teasing, but he knew that his entire crew would be whispering about this. 

“Are you asking me to leave?” Katara had seemed a little hurt.

“I’m begging you to stay,” Zuko had whispered, attempting to hold her close to his chest. He had been sure that if she left, it would break his heart, but he wanted her to make her own decisions. He wanted her to know what to expect. “but people will talk.”

“Let them. I want to stay.” Katara had slid off Zuko’s body and snuggled into the space between his arm and his ribs. She had wrapped herself around him, intertwining their legs and pressing small kisses onto Zuko’s pectoral.

They had fallen asleep like that. Zuko stayed awake too long and woke up too early. He still couldn’t be convinced that it had all been real. Even now, with Katara still next to him, he wasn’t convinced. The early morning like baked through the windows, and as the boat passed through a large swell, Katara stirred. Zuko went completely rigid; he held his breath, preparing for the worst. Katara moaned quietly. Her hand, which had been resting on the pillow, by her face began moving slowly. When she found Zuko’s arm, she rolled into it, wrapping both arms around it, and pulling her leg up over his hip. Zuko instantly relaxed into her touch.

“It’s not polite to stare,” Katara said into his shoulder. Zuko hadn’t even seen her open her eyes.

“I can’t help myself.”

Katara giggled. She mumbled, “What time is it?”

“Early. Far too early for either of us to be awake, probably.”

Katara hoisted herself up onto her side. She leaned her head on her elbow and smiled down at Zuko, who brought his hand to her arm, and stroked the soft skin of her forearm. She stared at him, and he stared back. He wanted every morning to be like this.

“Morning,” Katara smiled. It was a soft smile that seemed to radiate from somewhere deep inside. She leaned down and kissed Zuko passionately. Her hand rested on his chest while his hand tangled itself in her hair. Both of them let out a breathless moan into the kiss. Katara pulled back, smiling.

“You stayed,” Zuko said, or maybe asked.

“Of course, I stayed.” Katara’s fingers lightly danced over the star on Zuko’s abdomen. She seemed sad. Zuko couldn’t really read her emotion. He cocked his head at her to ask what was wrong. “Does it ever bother you?”

Zuko wondered if she meant physically or mentally. Either way, the answer was, “No, not really. You did a good job healing me.” Katara smiled sadly again. “What is it?”

“We have a lot to talk about, don’t we?” Katara asked.

“I suppose so.” Zuko was afraid to talk. He wasn't good at expressing himself. He didn’t want to ruin anything, and life had a way of getting in the way. 

“I don’t think we should tell anyone about this. About us.”

Zuko didn't like that one bit. He'd tattoo her name across his chest today if he could. A knot in Zuko’s stomach formed. “I… are you ashamed?”

“What? No, of course not! Zuko, I told you last night how much I’ve wanted this. Last night was everything to me. I know I already said this, but, like, seriously, wow.” Katara kissed Zuko feverishly. Zuko forgot all of his worries to give in to the kiss. He wanted to whine when Katara eventually pulled back. “I’m the furthest thing from ashamed, but as much as I want to be public about this, we have a lot to take into consideration. I mean, we have to think about what this means for you, the Fire Lord, and me, an ambassador... While I'm still am one. I’d like to do that without the questions and prying eyes of our friends, you know?”

Katara kissed him again, then continued, “I just want us to be just us for a little while. No titles, no higher responsibilities, just you and me. I think we should figure out what we are, and what that means, on our own. I don’t want to get bombarded before we’re ready. Do you understand where I’m coming from?”

Zuko did understand. He loved their friends, but they’d all want to know too much before he and Katara had figured anything out. Zuko nodded. “I think that’s probably a good idea. Besides, I don’t know if I can look Aang or your brother in the eyes after last night. If they knew what we did, I think they might kill me, or worse, Toph will ask invasive questions.”

Katara cackled, howled, really. Zuko thought it might be the second prettiest sound she’d ever made. The first being the way his name staggered from her lips as her legs shook with pleasure. Zuko rolled on top of Katara and pinned her on the bed to kiss her. He worked his way down her neck and started to kiss down her chest.

“I like the idea of keeping this all to myself,” he mumbled before he blew a raspberry on her stomach.

“Zuko! Stop,” Katara giggled, pulling him back up for another long kiss. She flipped them again so that she was now resting on his hips. She pulled off the kiss and sat up straight. Zuko loved his view: Katara, shamelessly topless on top of him, hair beautifully sticking in different directions, and littered with marks that he’d caused. Despite wanting to bring his hands to her chest, his fingers traced the faint bruises on her thighs and hips. She smiled.

“Do they hurt?” Katara shook her head. She brought her hand down to cover Zuko’s, but let Zuko continue to roam her body with his hands.

“I suppose I should fix them, though,” Katara finally said. “I think our cover will be blown if both of us walk out with purple necks.” Zuko brought his hand to his neck. He sat up so he could see himself in the large mirror that rested against the wall next to his bed. His body was also covered in hickies. He wanted to tell Katara to leave it because he liked being branded by her, but he knew she was right. He let Katara work water into his neck and chest to get rid of the marks.

Katara was now sitting on the bed, but her legs rested comfortably over his thighs. As soon as she was done healing both of them, Zuko pulled her in for another kiss. Katara pushed him back onto the bed, keeping their lips connected. Zuko never wanted the kiss to end. He let his fingers innocently slip under the waistband of her underwear. Katara was painting into his mouth, but a knock jarred them apart. They stared at each other in horror.

“Hello?” Zuko called. Katara looked panicked. ' _What do I do?’_ She mouthed. ‘ _Hide under the covers!’_ Zuko mouthed back.

“Your highness? It’s Ming Lee.” Katara scrambled under the covers and laid as flat as possible.

Zuko waited until she was fully covered by the blanket before stating, “Come in.”

Ming lee entered. He looked around, and it was then that Zuko realized what the room looked like. The covers were disheveled. Zuko was sure how obvious it was that Katara was beneath them. Their clothes were strewn across the room, only making matters worse. Zuko wanted to die.

“Sir, we’ll be docking around 10:30 AM. I wanted to know if you’d be requesting breakfast here, or if you’ll be eating on Ember Island?”

“We can eat when we get there,” Zuko replied.

“Very well. Also, Prince Panuk left early this morning. He asked that you, as well as the group, were given this note.” Ming Lee had an envelope in his outstretched hand. Zuko sat forward to grab it, but he realized that if he moved forward too much, Katara would be found out. Katara bit his thigh lightly, warning him that her cover was only his legs and the blankets. Zuko yelped and laid back down. Ming Lee gave Zuko a concerned look.

“You can just leave it on the table,” Zuko said. His face flushed a deep magenta shade. Ming Lee gently placed the envelope on the table next to his undrunk glass of fire whiskey from the night before. Ming Lee caught Zuko’s eye before he left and gave him a sly smile. As soon as the door shut, Zuko threw back the covers to reveal Katara smiling up at him. The sight of her between his legs made him, _all of him_ , twitch. She seemed to know what she was doing, judging by the sly smile on her face. “You’re evil, you know that?”

“Do you think he knew I was here?”

“He definitely knew something was up.” Katara laughed at that. She slowly dragged her body up his, sure to roll her hips into his. She pressed her lips firmly into Zuko’s. Both of them moaned into the kiss breathlessly. Zuko couldn’t control himself, he was hard again.

“I guess I should probably go get ready,” Katara whispered. Zuko whined in detest as she pulled herself up and off the bed. Katara smiled cheekily at him. His heart skipped a few beats; _Agni, what a view._ “It’s a shame we didn’t get to use this private door more,” Katara mused, unlocking the door.

“At least on Ember Island, we’ll only be sneaking around our friends and not guards,” Zuko said.

“That’s ultimately less sexy, isn’t it?”

“Not really. Not when it’s you.”

Katara smiled at Zuko before she slipped through the door. Zuko’s heart pounded in his chest, and his hands felt clammy, but in a good way. His sheets smelled of Katara. He could still feel her lips on his, and her hands in his hair. He sighed to himself, knowing he needed to keep his mouth shut around his friends. He was sure his mouth wouldn't be the problem, but he knew the dumbstruck smile would be a dead giveaway. Oh well, He couldn’t be dammed anyway. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone wants to know how my mental health is, know that I've cried 6 times rewatching Korra and I only just finished season 2 lol. Thank you for continuing to support this i'm emo at all your support and comments!!!


	15. Deep Blue, But You Painted Me Golden

Katara sunk her body into the warm water of her bath. The porcelain tub was fancier than any of the ones in any of her modest homes. It was long and deep with golden feet. Unlike her tubs, though, this one didn’t have a faucet. Two servants had to bring pales of hot water, which made her mildly uncomfortable, but they assured her it wasn’t a problem. Katara assumed that fire benders were able to keep the water warm for extended periods, making bath time relaxing in faucet-less tubs. As it was, Katara’s baths on the ship had to be somewhat quick.

As she closed her eyes and sunk deeper into the water, she thought about what it would be like to have _her_ fire bender in the tub with her. She wouldn’t even need Zuko to warm the water up with bending; she could think of other ways to keep them warm. A sly smile spread across Katara’s face. She thought of the events that had transpired last night as she lightly scrubbed her body with a soapy cloth. The bruises and marks were gone, but the feeling of Zuko’s hands and lips still lingered.

The blissful feeling of Zuko’s soft, warm lips muttering into her collarbone wasn’t something Katara could forget so easily. Had it all been real or some hazy dream that she’d wake up from with the next jolt of the ship? Katara didn’t want to wake up if Zuko truly wanted her. After 7 years, she finally let herself give in to the temptation and terror of letting Zuko know her intimately, and it was... exquisite. He had been kind and gentle and loving until he was passionate, animalistic, and wild. She was so, _so_ happy.

Katara dunked herself underwater. She needed to pull herself together. If she didn’t maintain some level of social decorum today, she and Zuko would be known. While Katara wanted to scream from the mountaintops that her heart belonged with Zuko, she didn’t know if she could yet. She knew he wanted her, but did he understand the implications? Never mind what the Tribal Council had to say about their relationship, what of Zuko's advisors, and the people of the Fire Nation. Katara wasn't so sure they'd take too kindly to a Water Bender stealing the affections of their Fire Lord. Still, Zuko was an idealist, Katara was a realist. His blind optimism was attractive, but it wouldn’t help the push back Katara knew was inevitable. They had two weeks of bliss ahead of them before the real world caught up to them.

The air in her quarters chilled her to the bone as she emerged from the tub. She hadn’t come in last night to close her windows. She shivered as she dressed. She’d give anything to be tangled in Zuko’s sheets right now. His perma-warm body would pull hers against his. His hands would roam freely over her body, and she’d shiver even though she’d be the warmest she’d felt in a long time. Katara was used to the cold, she loved it, really. She never imagined a life without it, but in a surprising turn of events, her heart suddenly longed for heat. 

The two women who fetched her water for her bath were now asking for her baggage. She really didn’t like people helping her like this, especially when they were being paid to do so. The whole idea of servants just rubbed Katara the wrong way, even if it did provide jobs. Zuko never called them that, though. They were always his “personal staff.” He knew their all names and treated them so kindly. Still, it was a luxury Katara didn’t grow up with and didn’t think she could ever get used to.

Katara made her way to the weatherdeck to meet her friends. She attempted to control her breathing as she stressed about how she was going to be able to act normal with Zuko. She was pretty sure that if she saw him in his royal regalia with windswept hair, she wouldn’t be able to restrain herself from jumping him right there. To her mixed relief and disappointment, Zuko was not there yet. Her friends laid against Appa's furry legs casually. 

“Good morning,” Katara sang. She had a pep in her step that did not go unnoticed.

“What’s so good about?” Sokka asked, looking at Katara through groggy, tired eyes. Katara rolled her eyes playfully at her brother.

“What? You’re not excited to get off this ship? C’mon, Sokka! Ember Island has beaches and markets, and nightlife, Oh My!” Katara teased.

“Too early for positivity,” Sokka buried his head into Suki’s shoulder.

“I know I’m excited to get off of this watery death trap! I’m sick of not being able to see well. It’s awful!” Toph added.

“I bet Appa’s excited, aren’t you, Boy?” Aang asked. Appa roared softly in agreement. Katara leaned against Appa’s warm furry leg and sighed dreamily. She zoned out, thinking about her and Zuko sneaking away from the group to see a play, or getting “lost” in town for an afternoon stroll.

“Katara? Hello? Earth to Katara?” Toph yelled, pulling Katara out of her fantasies.

“Huh? Oh, sorry.”

“Geez, daydream much?”

“Sorry, what’s up?”

“I was asking where Panuk is?” Aang asked.

“Oh, um… I, uh…” Katara had been so caught up in her and Zuko that she completely forgot about Panuk. _Spirits, a world where Panuk didn’t exist…_ Katara couldn’t let herself daydream for too long. She started to panic. Katara couldn’t tell her friends he threatened her, or that she threatened him right back. At least, not until she figured things out with Zuko, so how could she explain what had happened? Ming Lee had said he’d left, right? Katara sputtered, “He had to leave this morning.”

“What? Why?” Sokka inquired.

“Um, he wasn’t super clear.”

“Aw, look at her, she’s blushing!” Suki teased. "Judging by the mark on her neck, it couldn’t have been an easy choice for him to leave.” Suki winked. Aang and Sokka both gagged.

Katara nearly squealed. She brought her hand to her neck. She thought she had gotten rid of all her hickies. Katara was mortified. She didn’t even know how to go about correcting Suki. Katara’s cheeks blushed again.

“So he macks on you and then just leaves with no explanation?” Toph asked. "Not very propper of him, but respect."

“No! Um, well… he said…” _Shit, shit, shit!_

“He left us a note!” Zuko interjected, joining the group. _The note, of course!_ Katara sighed in relief until she saw the weary look on Zuko's face. _Uh_ _oh._

“Well? Do tell, Hotman,” Aang urged.

Zuko cleared his throat, _“I’m so sorry that I have to leave on such short notice. Last night I received a message from my correspondent in the Earth Kingdom who I was originally traveling to meet with. His father has fallen ill. The trade negotiations have been moved up to ensure his father will be well enough to approve the terms of the agreement. I hate that I didn’t get to say goodbye, but I have to fulfill my duties.”_

That felt like a call out. 

Zuko continued, “ _Sokka, it was great seeing you again. I wish you and Suki a lifetime of happiness, and I look forward to attending your wedding."_ Over my dead body, Katara thought. “ _Toph, it was lovely meeting you and I look forward to building stronger relations with the Earth Kingdom through our continued friendship. Aang, thank you for your kind words and generosity both in the past and on this trip. The Northern Water Tribe will not forget your kindness. If there is anything we can do for you, just ask. Fire Lord Zuko, thank you for your hospitality and humility. I hope that you’ll remember our talks and heed my advice. I imagine you won’t, but that’s your decision to make. Just remember what the consequences are of your actions. Be smarter than your father before you.”_

Zuko paused. It was brief enough that someone unknowingly would assume that he was just catching his breath, but Katara knew it wasn’t just that. They made eye contact that seemed to communicate everything: this letter wasn’t just to explain why he left, it was a warning. It was a reminder that Panuk believed he held the upper hand.

“ _Lastly, to My Katara, I wish our last conversation had gone differently, but I enjoyed our time together nonetheless. I look forward to more of it in the future. Sleep on things. Remember who you are. You know I’m right. My heart stays with you. You’ll see me again soon. Yours, Panuk."_ Yuck.

“Aw, that’s so sweet,” Suki said. Katara rolled her eyes. It wasn’t sweet, it was manipulative. She looked at her friends, who all smiled at the message. Panuk was so good at charming people. No one knew what he said to her or Zuko, and she couldn’t tell them without risking exposing their relationship, which was still so fragile. She looked at her toes, hoping they wouldn’t notice her.

“Aw, Katara, are you blushing?” Aang asked.

“No!” Katara protested.

“You so are! You like him, don't you?" Aang asked, and what was Katara supposed to say to that? If she said yes, she'd be lying. If she said no, questions would be asked that she wasn't ready to answer. She hadn't been blushing, but now she assumed she was. Her cheeks felt hot. "Katara, that’s so cute!” Aang gushed. "

“It _is_ so cute, Katara,” Zuko added. “Nice hickey, by the way,” Zuko smirked at her. Katara's mouth gaped. For the second time that morning, she brought her hand to her neck. The group laughed, mounting Appa, who would take them to shore. Katara didn't move. She let everyone board before her, still rubbing the slightly purple mark on her neck.

As Zuko moved to mount Appa, he teased in her ear, “Maybe you should double-check your healing next time.”

“Maybe you should check where you leave your marks next time,” Katara hissed back.

“No, I don’t think I will.”

Zuko’s hand slid down her back and briefly, rested on her butt before he removed it and pushed passed her as nothing happened. She shook her head and smiled at him as he passed. Suki caught her eye from atop Appa and squinted suspiciously at her. Katara looked away quickly, afraid her eyes would give her away. She heard Suki gasped like she'd figured something out, but when Katara reached Appa's saddle, Suki was already on Sokka's lap like she hadn't seen anything. Katara's eyes flicked to Zuko's lap, which looked so inviting. Zuko caught her staring and hid a smile by looking towards Ember Island. Hiding was going to be harder than Katara thought.

* * *

The Fire Lord’s private home came into view as they soared towards the peak of Ember Island. The façade was different than Katara remembered. It seemed cleaner and brighter. It must have been refurbished, but it still brought back an eerily familiar feeling. Last time she had been on Ember Island, she was nearing 15. Here she, along with the rest of the group, learned to not just trust Zuko, but to view him as a friend. Back then, the future was terrifyingly uncertain. Now, things were falling into place despite the constant haze of uncertainty the future always held. This time, the thought of the future, excited her more than it scared her.

She stifled a giggle as she thought about how the Ember Island Players would react if they saw her and Zuko’s relationship now. Maybe that playwright hadn’t been that far off.

“What? No servants here?” Toph asked, waiting for someone to take her bag, but no one came. The foyer was overwhelmingly intimidating in stature. The décor was different than Katara remembered too. It was warmer, somehow.

“No. My mom wanted this place to be a real home for us. Somewhere we could be a real family without the responsibilities the Fire Palace brought on. I used to love coming here when I was little because it was the only time I felt normal. No staff is a tradition I like to keep here.”

Katara smiled at that. The idea of no prying Fire Nation eyes for two weeks made Katara relax a little bit. It was one thing less to worry about. It didn’t hurt that she and Zuko’s rooms were next to each other, either.

* * *

The morning passed by quickly and melted into a blistering afternoon. Sokka suggested the beach, and Katara couldn’t think of a better way to beat the heat. The beach was private, only accessible by boat or from the back of the Fire Lord’s private home. It was nice that they didn’t have to deal with a hoard of Fire Nation teenagers. Katara wasn’t sure she wanted to see the girls throw themselves at Zuko, because she knew they would. They had done so before he was the Fire Lord, so something told her it would be exponentially worse now. The afternoon was filled with swimming, laughing, and one too many games of Volleyball for Katara’s taste. She did enjoy watching Zuko’s body flex every time he went to spike the ball, though. 

“You alright over there, Zuko?” Aang asked. They were all laying out on the warm sand, letting the sun bask over them. Zuko was sitting up, staring at the water. His brows were furrowed.

“Hm? Oh, yeah, I’m fine. I’m just thinking about how different my life is every time I come here.”

“How so?” Suki asked.

“Well, I used to come here a lot when I was a kid, and I had really fond memories of the place. Then I was banished, and I didn’t come here again until my “honor” had been reinstated. I was with Azula at that time.”

“Gross,” Sokka interrupted. “No offense, Man. But you know… gross.”

Zuko laughed. “None taken. That wasn't a trip I remember fondly. It’s just funny because the next time I came here was with you guys. I was the banished traitor prince, and we still had to fight my father.” Zuko squeezed his eyes shut. That couldn’t have been a happy memory for him. “And the time after that, I was here with Mai. I was the Fire Lord, but I had no real grasp on it, and I was so stressed the whole time. Now I’m here with you guys, and it feels… good for the first time since I was a kid. Normal, I guess.”

A chorus of “Aw’s” rang out from her friends. She was sure they kept talking, but her brain stopped functioning after Zuko said Mai. He had brought Mai here for a romantic getaway. _Does he bring all of his girls here?_ Katara was being stupid. She knew that it wasn’t like that, but her chest tightened. She felt horrid.

“I’m going to go for a swim,” Katara said, interrupting her brother’s story. She didn’t wait for a response. She stripped off the swim cover she had been wearing and made her way to the ocean. She felt better as soon as the cold water licked at her toes. She waded out until the water line hit below her chest. She dunked herself under the water, letting the ocean clear her head.

She couldn’t help the feeling of jealousy that had erupted inside of her. She didn't want to feel that way. She liked Mai well enough, and they had broken up a while ago. She knew Zuko liked her now, so his past shouldn’t matter. She had exes too. She realized she was upset not because he dated Mai, but because of how casually he brought up their rendezvous here. The implications of him and Mai vacationing together on this beautiful island were pretty clear, and it made her feel less special. 

It was childish to be upset. Knowing that made Katara even angrier. To make matters worse, she couldn’t get Panuk’s comments out of her head: _He’s fire nation, you’re water tribe. It’d never work._ What if he was right? Katara has been floating for some time, trying to mull over her feelings. She didn’t want to go back to the group angry and spoil everyone's fun.

“You know, you’ll prune up if you stay in here any longer,” Zuko’s voice called to her. She opened her eyes to see him standing over her floating body. He looked so cute, she was angry. Katara didn’t know how to respond without snapping. She stayed silent. “I’ve been sent to fetch you. We’re going back to the house.”

“Okay,”

“I wish I could kiss you right now.”

Katara lifted her head to see her friends watching them as they packed up the beach. “Too many prying eyes.” Her response was cold.

“Are you mad at me?” Zuko asked. _Shit._

“No, I’m just being stupid,” Katara sighed. She placed her feet on the muddy ocean floor and stared at Zuko. He cocked his head in confusion. “I got kind of upset earlier when you mentioned Mai,” Katara admitted. Her voice started speeding up as she got nervous. “And I know that’s really stupid because you aren’t even together anymore, and who am I to judge? My ex-boyfriend is my best friend. I have no right to be upset with you, and that makes me even more upset with myself and—“

Katara stopped talking when Zuko grabbed her hand under the water. He whispered, “You’re cute when you’re jealous.”

“I’m not jealous!” Katara nearly screamed. Zuko raised a brow at Katara. “Okay, fine. I’m jealous. I’m crazy jealous, but I can’t shake what Panuk said about our differences, and things with Mai must have been so easy.” Katara bowed her head. Under the water, Zuko’s thumb traced a small circle on her hand.

“Just because it was easy, doesn’t mean it was right. Trust me, you don’t have anything to worry about when it comes to Mai. She should’ve been worried about you, though. She was worried, actually.”

"Really?"

"She almost didn't let me come to your 16th birthday. In hindsight, she had a point."

“I wish I could kiss you right now,” Katara repeated Zuko’s earlier sentiment. Zuko smiled a goofy smile, and Katara really, _really_ wanted to kiss him.

“What do you say we come back out here tonight for a midnight swim, just the two of us?” The thought of sneaking down to the beach with Zuko made Katara’s heart flutter.

“I’d love that.”

When they got back to the beach, their friends were debating what to have for dinner. Katara put her bag around her shoulder, still smiling at the thought of having some alone time with Zuko. Suki caught Katara’s eye for the second time that day and gave her another suspicious look. Katara smiled guiltily. Suki was definitely on to them.

Hiding definitely wasn't going to be easy.


	16. Illicit Affairs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all the support! I've been having some bad writer's block with the final few chapters, but your support really motivates me!

Zuko quietly crept out of his room around midnight. He shut his door softly and tiptoed down the long hallowed halls. Sneaking around his home was mildly easier than attempting to lurk around his ship. He valued the privacy of his Ember Island home. There were no guards, no staff, and no advisors breathing down his neck. 

He felt like a whole person here.

Zuko found Katara standing in the courtyard waiting for him, staring at the moon. The way the pale light illuminated her face reminded him of what she looked like when they were kids. She was beautiful then, but now Zuko didn’t have the words to describe her. He walked up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. She jumped slightly at the touch but relaxed into it once she realized it was him. Intertwining their hands, Katara leaned her head back against his chest. Zuko craned his neck to place a soft kiss on her lips. He made his way down her neck placing supple kisses on velvety skin. He stopped at the curve of her shoulder.

“Ready?” Zuko mumbled into her skin. Katara nodded and took his hand. 

"What's that?" Katara asked. 

"Rice wine," Zuko whispered. "I found it in the cellars today and thought it might be enjoyable under the moonlight." 

A smile broke across Katara's face. "Open it."

Zuko complied, twisting the cork out of the ornate, plum bottle. He offered Katara the first sip. They walked silently down to the beach, passing the wine back and forth until both of their bodies hummed happily from the alcohol. Zuko always liked how silent the world got at night. The silence reminded him that he was alive. The quiet nature sounds drowned out his thoughts better than his daytime distractions. He liked being the only one awake as everyone slept. In those hours, he felt the world opened up to him.

“It looks so peaceful,” Katara said in a hushed tone when they got to the beach. The moon created a shimmering reflection upon the dark water. The stars were vibrant, casting shadows on the night sky.

“You know we don’t need to whisper anymore,” Zuko said, but he was whispering too. It felt wrong to be brash and loud in a setting this serene. They were silent for a long time, staring onto the dark horizon. “So, are we going to swim?”

“Race you to it!” Katara exclaimed, stripping off her cover and kicking off her shoes. Zuko started to undress, too, but became distracted as Katara began throwing her hair into a ponytail. He stared at her. He didn’t get to really look at her when they were with their friends. He couldn’t. He wasn't strong enough to not kiss her in front of everyone. Not when she looked like that.

“What?” Katara asked. She looked down at her body. Her hands crossed over her midriff in an insecure manner. Zuko grabbed her hands and uncrossed them, placing them on his shoulders. Katara instinctively wrapped her arms around his neck. Zuko let his hands roam around her waist.

“Now that I know I can kiss you whenever I want, it’s even harder to restrain myself,” Zuko said.

“You don’t have to right now.”

Zuko leaned in and connected their lips. Katara’s body molded against his. It was a sickeningly sweet kiss. There were no ulterior motives. This kiss wasn’t intended to lead them anywhere other than right here. Zuko didn’t think he’d ever get sick of kissing Katara. He pulled off the kiss and rested his forehead on Katara’s.

“You lost,” Zuko said.

“Wha—” Zuko broke into a full sprint towards the water before Katara could finish her sentence. She squealed, running in after him. They splashed around in the water for a bit. Katara attempted to dunk Zuko under the water.

“I hate you!” katara giggled on Zuko’s back, attempting to drag him under the water.

“No, you don’t.”

“You’re right,” Katara admitted. Her arms fell from his head to his shoulders. Zuko pulled her around, so her legs were wrapped around his torso still, but she was facing him. He beamed at her. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“How am I looking at you?”

“All… _fo_ _nd_.”

“I can’t help it,” Zuko sighed happily. Katara closed the gaps between their bodies. Kissing Katara took his breath away every time. Through the night, kisses were interrupted by giggles and splashes. The midnight air was chilly, especially as they walked back to the dwelling, but it didn’t feel so cold with Katara’s hand in his. They were sopping wet, but Zuko didn’t care.

They ended the night tangled up in his sheets. He relished the feeling of Katara’s body in his arms. She was soft and warm as she fell asleep. Their legs intertwined, and her toes buried under his leg to find extra warmth. He threaded a few locks of her hair between his fingers as he listened to her breath steady out. Zuko liked letting Katara fall asleep first just so he could thank all the cosmic forces in the world that she was there with him. He’d make it a habit of praying more if it meant Katara never slept in another’s bed.

In the morning, he woke up to Katara, smiling down at him, and she ran her fingers through his hair.

“We can make things work, can’t we?” She asked so quietly that Zuko wasn’t sure he heard her correctly.

“I don’t know what I’ll do if we don’t,” he whispered back. Katara smiled at him, almost sadly. He knew what that look meant. They weren't out of the woods yet. There was so much, maybe too much, left to discuss. She kissed him briefly before she slipped out of his bed, back to her own room. The bed was still warm where she had laid. Zuko let himself drift back to sleep for another hour with the smell of Katara lingering in his nose. 

* * *

Each day became a game for Zuko and Katara. How far could they take it without their friends noticing they were together? How many stolen kisses and sly touches could they slide under their friend's noses? It was dangerous and exciting, and so unbelievably sexy. He loved watching her shiver and blush at his light, innocent touches under the dinner table. He loved teasing her until she’d punch or shove him slightly just so he could give her an apology hug that would last only a second too long. Katara retaliated by finding all of Zuko’s weak spots and exploiting them whenever she could. She’d purposefully walk in the way that made her hips sway just to drive Zuko mad just so he'd slam his hips into her backside and kiss her neck in hidden corridors.

The days were long, and the nights were painfully short. The days were filled with adventures and games. Zuko had been counting down every second until he’d have Katara alone again. If he hadn't, he might even enjoy the time he was spending with his friends. To be fair, he was enjoying it, but not as much as he was enjoying Katara sneaking into his room every night. He didn’t even care if they had sex, though most nights they did. 

Zuko knew not all problems can be solved with sex; he had tried that before, and it didn’t work, but he felt confident sexually. He knew he could please her, and that he was good at pleasing her. His confidence faltered at the emotional aspects of their relationship... if that's what they had. He wasn't quite sure. They hadn't talked about it. Nevertheless, it felt good to be with Katara without being observed. He didn’t have to worry about anything when he was with her. Stolen kisses, and clandestine brushes of the skin, filled Zuko’s mind with a starry fog he had only ever seen in dreams.

Four nights in and Zuko found himself aching more than ever for the feeling of Katara’s hand in his and the sweet, fresh scent of her hair. She hadn’t snuck through the door yet. He was used to the agony of anticipation as he listened for the quiver of the floorboards under Katara’s toes as she slunk into his bedroom. She had never left him waiting this long. Resentfulness befell Zuko. What if she wasn’t coming? And if she wasn’t, why?

Anxiety engulfed Zuko until he became restless. He threw back the covers with a fervor. Reluctantly, he hurried to her room, careful to leave his footsteps light. He hesitated briefly before discretely rapping his knuckles against the white door. The door opened to reveal an anxiety-ridden Katara. Her hair was pulled back into a long, bushy ponytail. The robe she wore was tied tightly around her waist. If she was surprised to see him, she didn’t show it.

She didn’t speak as she let him in. Her body moved into his silently. She let out a breathy sigh of relief against his chest. Each night Katara had been the one to come to Zuko’s bed. Zuko wondered if she was testing him to see if he’d sneak to her. Judging the anguished expression she tried to hide, he assumed there was more going on.

“Is everything okay?” Zuko questioned, thumbing her cheek. His lips pressed into her forehead.

“I’ve been thinking.”

“Agni, forbid.” Katara shoved him playfully. Her smile wasn’t quite as bright as it usually was.

“I’ve been thinking about us, the Tribal Council, and pretty much all of the consequences of this.” Katara gestured between. Zuko gulped nervously. Could the fortress he’d built up in his mind to protect them finally be crumbling?

“And?”

“And my position in A.P.P.A. is contingent on the Tribal Council, but it doesn’t have to be. I’m a peace ambassador now, but there are so many other international positions. The governing body of A.P.P.A. is made up of individuals from all nations. I could be one of them, right?”

“I don’t see why not,” Zuko said, but somehow he worried about that in the long run. 

“I love being a peace ambassador, but the more I think about it, the more I’ve realized that it was never meant to be a forever thing. I want to serve my nation, but I don’t think I was made to do that under someone else’s rules. Especially not when those rules devalue me for being a woman and fault me for my feelings. Still, I need to talk to the tribal council. They need to hear about everything, us especially, from me. After this vacation is over, I’m going back to meet with the tribal council. I’m going to explain everything and suffer the consequences.”

“Katara…” Small tears welled in Katara’s eyes. “What do you think they’ll do?” Zuko rubbed her arms in a way he hoped was comforting.

“I don’t know. It’ll probably just be a slap on the wrist. I mean, if the worst the council can do is remove me from my position and I remove myself, then they have nothing over me.”

“But you shouldn’t have to do that.”

“No, I shouldn’t, but if it means I can have you then…” Katara trailed off. She stared into Zuko’s eyes. Zuko was sure she was staring directly into his soul. 

“Katara I don’t want to be the person who pulls you apart from your people. If that happens… then Panuk was right,” Zuko sighed.

“Don’t you get it? You’re not the one pulling me away from them, you’re the one giving me the courage to stand up to their outdated mentality.” Katara flung her leg over Zuko’s hips, so she was straddling his thighs. Zuko had to stifle a moan as she ran her nails over his scalp. “I want to fight for this. For us.”

Those were the words Zuko wanted, needed, to hear. In all of Zuko’s wildest fantasies and darkest dreaming, he’d never allowed himself to entertain the idea of Katara wanting him. Zuko had indulged himself in the occasional wandering vision where he and Katara got together, but he never allowed himself to imagine that she would want him long-term. How could she? And now she was smiling at him, on his lap, confirming that she wanted him not just in her bed but by her side.

Zuko ran his hands over her back then pulled her in for a passionate kiss. He was smiling through the kiss, and so was she.

“Do you want me to come with you? To meet the tribal council, that is,” Zuko said breathlessly.

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to. I don’t think I’ll be much help with the tribal council, but I at least want to be there for support.” Katara beamed at him as he spoke. A screech sounded from outside the large window of Katara's room, which looked out over the rolling hills and jutted cliffsides of the island. Zuko and Katara exchanged a confused glance. "Expecting mail?"

"No, but I suppose it could be from my Dad," Katara whispered, standing to let the hawk in. Katara untied the parchment from the bird's foot. The letter was sealed with dark green wax and a familiar lotus emblem.

"It's from Uncle," Zuko said.

Katara handed him the letter. "What does he have to say?" Katara sat down behind Zuko on the bed, letting her lips press to the small amount of exposed skin where his neck meets his shoulder. Zuko shuddered. 

"I don't know— _Oh_ , Agni," Zuko muttered, remembering the letter he sent his Uncle Last week. The one where he described in agonizing detail, the inner turmoil of his feelings.

"What?"

"This is embarrassing."

"What?" Katara pestered again, smiling at Zuko's flushed face. Zuko bent the letter inward so Katara couldn't see his Uncle roasting him for being indecisive. 

"The night before we, you know, got together, I kind of sent my Uncle a letter asking him what I should do about my feelings for you. This must be his reply."

"You what?" Katara giggled. "You asked the great General Iroh, Dragon of the West, for girl advice?" Katara was nearly cackling now. 

"Well, who else was I going to ask?" Zuko was exasperated. His voice raised more than he wanted it to. Katara flinched slightly but didn't let his frustration deter her from wrapping her arms around his middle and kissing his cheek. "You're hopeless. And adorable. Go ahead and read it."

Katara pushed off the bed to give Zuko privacy with his letter. Katara poured both of them a cup of tea as Zuko read his letter. 

_Nephew,_

_It is good to hear from you, though I wish I got news more often. Have you forgotten your humble uncle and his tea shop in the Earth Kingdom? I am glad to hear you are connecting with your emotions, even if the ones you feel are heartbreak and anguish. To feel pain is better than to feel nothing at all. You challenge my tea logic often, but I do believe this problem could be solved with tea. Make her a cup of oolong tea (her favorite if I remember correctly), and tell her how you feel. I cannot promise you she will return your sentiment, but I can promise that you will not lose her. She is far too kind and loyal for that to happen. I suspect, though, that she does love you in some capacity. There is a balance between fire and water. The elements are more complementary than we are led to believe. I think, should she return your love, there is more hope for the two of you than you might think._

_As for her other suitor, all I can tell you is to be better than him. Love is a mysterious force, one that not even duty can overpower. I wish you luck, Nephew. Please come visit me at the Jasmine Dragon, soon. We can discuss love and war over a lively game of Pai Sho. I am an old man, and your visits bring me the fleeting joys of youth._

_Love,_

_Iroh_

Zuko smiled as he read Iroh's letter. Somehow, his uncle always knew the right things to say. As a teenager, that had really pissed him off. Now, he found comfort in his uncle's advice. Katara placed two cups in front of Zuko's face. 

"Heat?" She asked. Zuko inhaled, then breathed small flames over each cup to heat the tea inside. Katara sat next to him as the tea steeped. 

"Oolong?" 

"Always." Zuko chuckled. Iroh was always right. "What did your uncle have to say? Anything about me?" Katara waggled her eyebrows. 

"His advice came a little late, but he'd be happy to know we're together. He's always really liked you, Katara."

Katara blushed. "Iroh's a good man."

"Yeah, he is. He wants me to come to visit."

"At his tea shop?" Katara asked. Zuko nodded. "Do you think you could pick me up some tea while you're there? I've looked, but no one makes oolong leaves like the Jasmine Dragon."

"Is that all I'm good for? Fetching you tea and heating up beverages?" Zuko teased, placing his now empty cup on the ground. Katara did the same and mounted his hips again. The contact of her center moving over his thinly-clad dick made Zuko want to moan. 

"Among other things," Katara whispered filthily, inches from his lips. She kissed him while bucking her hips into his. 

“I want you to come with me to Ba Sing Se to visit my uncle after you talk to the Tribal Council. That is, if you want, of course.” Zuko awkwardly felt like he had demanded that she accompany him, and that was not what he wanted.

“Okay,” Katara said, pressing her forehead against his.

“Yeah?” Zuko smiled.

“Yeah,” Katara nodded and giggled. She kissed him furiously. Once again, he was smiling into the kiss. Katara pressed down onto Zuko’s shoulders, pressing him back onto her mattress.

Katara started to pull back. Zuko kept his mouth locked to hers for as long as he could. He looked up at the vision of a woman sitting above him. His hands roamed up her sides lazily. She smiled at him. 

“Spirits, Zuko, do you have any idea how hot you are?” Zuko just blushed. He didn't know how to respond. “You’re so cute when you’re bashful,” Katara whispered into his ear before nibbling on the lobe. 

“You don’t have to do that,” Zuko closed his eyes. His brows furrowed. He knew he wasn’t, not really. Not with the monstrosity his father had created. Katara leaned down and kissed his lips, then his cheek, then his scarred cheek, until she was peppering his face with kisses that burned. 

“You really don’t know, huh? Zuko, that scar doesn’t make you ugly. It never has. You’re absolutely gorgeous. Anytime we’re out in public, all the girls just gawk at you. Boys, too. And you don’t even notice, do you?”

“C’mon, stop it.”

“No, I want you to know how attractive you are. People throw themselves at you all the time.”

And that Zuko did know, but it had nothing to do with his looks. He'd never been particularly lucky or skilled in the girl department. The only girl that showed minor interest in him as a kid was Mai, and while that worked out well in the long run, it wasn't like she had been busting down his door to date him. That all changed when he assumed his responsibilities as Fire Lord. He did see the girls who stared at him and giggled when he walked by. They saw the title, not the person within the robes.

“It’s an occupational hazard, really. It has nothing to do with me,” Zuko sighed. 

“You're wrong. You’re really, truly devastating. Even before you were the Fire Lord, the girls in all the towns we’d pass through would stare at you. I can’t—look, I spent so long in the background watching you, afraid to make a move. The girls from the Fire Palace would kill to be in my position right now, and it has nothing to do with your title and everything to do with you. You capture everyone’s attention, and you don’t even notice.” 

Katara’s fingers moved Zuko’s hair out of his face as she spoke. She looked at him, so fondly, that Zuko wanted to freeze time just to remember her face like this.

“Only one person’s attention has ever mattered,” Zuko brought his hand up to Katara’s hair.

“You have it,” Katara whispered, Laying her chest on his. “You’ve always had it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really considering making a spotify playlist based on this fic because I draw a lot of inspiration from music and also idk if you've noticed but a majority of my song titles are lyrics ahahhaha


	17. Glass Houses Can't Keep Secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I say this every time but thank you all so much for the support! This has made me fall in love with writing again :)

Soft, warm sun pooled around Katara as she stretched like a kitten on a lounge chair on the large stone balcony of Zuko’s home. Suki reclined lazily next to her while Aang, Toph, and Sokka played cards. Zuko sat across the terrace under an umbrella as he read a book. The reflection of the sun glittering on the bay was enough to blind someone, but Katara became entranced by the way it sparkled.

Katara had not noticed that she had been absentmindedly tracing a spot on her inner thigh. If she removed her pants, she would reveal a maroon bruise, one that she could not bring herself to heal. A fond smile found it’s way to Katara’s lips. From across the balcony, she caught Zuko’s eyes. He stared back at her from over his book. Without words, they spoke to each other in lustful, longing looks. Zuko raised his eyebrows at Katara causing her to giggle quietly

“You seem happy,” Suki quipped.

“I am happy,” Katara replied, quickly moving her finger away from her leg. “It’s good to be here with everyone.”

“No, this is a different kind of happiness." 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Katara’s heart fluttered nervously. 

“No, of course, you don’t,” Suki’s tone suggested jest. "You must miss him deeply." Katara hummed quietly. Maybe Suki was not as astute as Katara believed. "He's very handsome, no?" Suki continued. "He really has grown into quite the handsome Fire Lord."

"Yeah, he has—wait, what?" katara squeaked. 

Suki chuckled, "Got ya!" 

"Look, Suki..." Katara started to explain, but Suki raised her hand to stop her.

“It's none of business, Katara. I’m just happy to see you happy,” Suki smiled brightly.

“Thank you, Suki,” Katara whispered. So, Suki knew what was going on between her and Zuko. She probably did not know all of it; it was likely just an inkling, but suki supported them, and somehow that was enough.

Katara knew she and Zuko had a lot to figure out, but she was willing to fight for them, and so was he. Katara closed her eyes again and let herself fall back into her daydreams about her and Zuko. The prospect of marriage and children had never excited her all the much. She knew she wanted those things, but when she pictured her future with the men of her past, it made her feel uncomfortable and anxious. Now, her stomach fluttered with excited nerves. _Not now, though, but eventually._

A hawk cawed overhead, pulling Katara out of her dreaming. The hawk swooped down onto Sokka’s shoulder, dropping a letter with a dark blue ribbon tied around the scroll. _Water Tribe._

“Thanks, Hawky!” Sokka chirped, petting the impressive bird. “Katara, it’s for you!”

Katara assumed it was from her father. Hakoda loved to send her and Sokka notes, especially when they were together. She raised her hand to catch the letter that Sokka had tossed. The ribbon caught Katara’s eye. It was not just _a_ Water Tribe ribbon; it was _the_ Water Tribe ribbon. Her father had not sent this letter, the tribal council had.

“Thanks,” Katara muttered.

“So, what does Panuk have to say?” Sokka asked with a sly smile while absent-mindedly shuffling the cards in his hands. Katara had not even opened the letter yet.

“I don’t think it’s from Panuk,” Katara chided nervously.

“Oh, come on Katara, I know he’s been sending you love notes."

"What? No, he hasn't!" 

"Oh, Katara, always so modest with your affections. I saw a hawk come to your balcony the other night. Don’t be shy, read us the mush!”

A hawk did come to her balcony a few nights ago, but the letter was for Zuko, not for her.

"Oh," Katara chuckled nervously, “right.”

Her fingers shakily pulled the ribbon until the soft satin fell over her legs, and the yellowing parchment unrolled. Her stomach flipped, and her brows furrowed. She held the letter tightly in her slender fingers. Her breath hitched. She had not even started to read the letter, but the faded navy emblem of the water tribe made her jitter.

“What is it, Katara?” Suki asked. 

Zuko was still reading under the sizable umbrella. He looked so peaceful. If their fate was not bleeding on the page in murky, black ink, she might have even crawled next to him and let him lull her to sleep as he read.

“Reality.”

“What?” Suki asked. 

Katara stood up abruptly as she scanned the letter. That caught everyone's attention. Zuko was on his feet immediately, but he did not move from his space under the shade. Aang, Toph, and Sokka had realized something was wrong too, and they made their way over to Katara, who was erratically pacing.

“Katara, what’s wrong?” Aang asked, grabbing his glider protectively, ready to strike if necessary. Katara glanced at Zuko, who gulped nervously.

“I’m being summoned to the Tribal Council.”

“What why?” Aang asked. 

“Because I rejected Prince Panuk.“

“Rejected?” Sokka squawked.

“Yeah, Sokka. Rejected. The Tribal Council has decided to take action against my 'defiance' unless a series of presumably unfortunate events get me to change my mind,” Katara spat.

“I don’t understand. I thought things were going well with Panuk?” Sokka mused.

“No, Sokka. Things were going awful with Panuk!”

“Katara, did you even give him a chance?” Sokka sighed like he had been expecting this to happen. 

“Excuse me? You literally saw me giving him a chance, Sokka! I’m sorry I didn’t fall all over him as everyone wanted, but it turns out Panuk is a huge dick.”

“I don’t understand why you always do this!"

“And I don’t _understand_ why everyone is so keen on seeing me married? What? Am I not good enough on my own? What about me being married makes me a more valuable bender or a better ambassador? I really don’t understand. Please, explain it to me.” Katara's was a scorpion, her words were venom, and she was striking for the kill. 

“Katara, you know it’s not like that.”

“Really? Because that’s how the tribal council makes it seem. I’m getting removed from my position because I won’t marry Panuk!”

“What?” Sokka asked. 

“Panuk threatened me the night before he left. He tried to coerce me into marriage with him, saying if I didn’t, I would get removed from my position. Now I’m getting summoned by the tribal council? I can put two and two together.”

“No, that can't be right! They probably just want an explanation," Sokka offered.

"I highly doubt that. When have they, or you, for that matter, listened to what I want?"

“The Tribal Council just wants to see you happy, and so do I!”

“Then, Spirits leave me alone!"

"Katara, you know that's not how things work in our tribe. You're almost nineteen, you should at least be engaged by now. You already knew Panuk, and you basically dated him. Why couldn’t it have been him?”

"Were you not listening? He threatened me!" Katara screeched. "I don't care that I'm being viewed as an old hag by our tribe. It's an outdated mentality, anyway! I’ve repeatedly asked to be left alone, and you just don’t listen. You all think you know what's best for me, and you don’t! 

Sokka looked down. “I just don’t like seeing you all alone.”

Katara was furious. She couldn't even control the words that left her mouth. “Yeah, well, I’m not alone, so.”

“What?” Sokka asked. Katara's heart plummeted to her stomach. _Shit_

“I—uh… well...”

"What do you mean, Katara?" Sokka asked again, this time angrier than the last. 

“Katara and Zuko are hooking up,” Toph said matter-a-factly.

“What?” Zuko, Katara, and Sokka all yelled. Katara's heart dropped even further, through her stomach and out of her body. She felt clammy and dizzy. 

“Oh, come on, guys! I’m blind, and even I can see that you two are totally together!” Toph giggled. _This is so not funny, Toph._

“What are you talking about, Toph?” Sokka asked, glancing between Zuko and Katara. Katara looked apologetically at Zuko, who showed no emotion. His stone face scared Katara a little.

“You guys aren’t exactly subtle,” Toph said, now addressing Zuko and Katara. A furious blush came to Katara’s cheeks. “I can hear you sneaking in and out of each other's rooms each night. Don’t even get me started on how loud you are within the room and your heartbeats around each other? You’re like hummingbats! The sound is honestly defining.”

“Is this true?” Sokka asked Katara. Katara looked at Zuko, who maintained his strict stature. The only difference was his eyes seemed to glisten with the promise of tears. Katara couldn’t lie anymore, even if some of the biggest details concerning their relationship post-vacation were still giant question marks.

“Yes,” Katara looked down at her feet, feeling guilty for lying to her friends.

“Did you guys know about this?” Sokka asked Aang and Suki. They both looked guilty.

“I wasn’t absolutely sure, but I assumed,” Aang said. Katara’s eyes widened; she had no idea Aang knew anything. Zuko didn’t look all that surprised, though, Zuko had barely shown any emotion since Katara and Sokka started screaming at each other. 

“Me, too.” Suki looked at Katara with a shade of guilt because that was not the whole truth. Suki definitely knew. Katara figured Suki knew even before this morning. Katara also knew Suki was not a tattletale, so she did not really mind.

“Unbelievable, so I’m just the idiot who didn’t know?” Sokka screamed.

“It wasn’t like that, Sokka! We didn’t want anyone to know.” Zuko winced at Katara’s words. She wanted to go over and hold his hand to reassure him that she was not ashamed but now was not the time. “We should’ve known hiding it from everyone was a bad and unrealistic idea, but we wanted to figure things out between us without prying eyes. We were going to tell you eventually. This isn’t how I wanted it to happen, though. I was hoping to break the news to the Tribal Council first, and to figure out how Zuko and I can move forward with our relationship given our opposing responsibilities.”

“I really can’t believe this. I put my neck out for you with the Tribal Council, and now I’m going to get in trouble. You made me look like a fool by hiding this from me.”

“Hang on. Your sister tells you that a man _you_ tried to set her up with _threatened_ her, and all you can think of is the slap on the wrist you’re going to get?” Zuko asked, stepping towards Sokka.

Katara could see the flames in his eyes. _Not good._ Katara grabbed Zuko’s hand as he walked passed her. She pulled him back towards her. His hand was hotter than usual. Katara could almost feel the flames that crackled under the skin. Zuko stopped in his tracks to look back at Katara with a hopeless look in his eyes. Katara wanted to kiss away that pain more than anything. She pulled softly on him as she shook her head slightly, begging him not to further aggravate the situation. 

He stepped back to stand next to Katara. Their hands stayed intertwined, and Katara brought her other hand to Zuko’s arm to squeeze it in a gentle, reassuring way. Zuko sighed softly, rubbing his thumb over Katara's hand as if to tell her he was sorry. Zuko's body temperature cooled significantly under Katara's contact. Sokka’s eyes somehow softened at the sight of Katara and Zuko silent communication.

“How long has this been going on?” Sokka asked.

“Since Panuk left the ship,” Katara said. “I tried with Panuk, I did, but it wouldn’t have worked out even if he didn’t threaten me. My heart would’ve always longed for this,” Katara gestured to Zuko’s hand in hers. Zuko squeezed her hand.

“He’s why you never liked anyone the Tribal Council set you up with?”

“Not completely. It's not like The Council ever set me up with the best people, to begin with, but, on some level, yeah, I think so.” They were silent for a long time. Katara had a million things to say, but she couldn’t formulate words. She felt awful that Aang, Suki, and Toph had to witness this family dispute.

“Did Panuk really threaten you?” Sokka finally asked, voice softer now.

“He treated me like a piece of meat. He wanted to see me barefoot, pregnant, and powerless; a submissive wife. Can you see that for me?” Sokka shook his head, eyes still fixated on the way Zuko's thumb traced circles over Katara's tanned skin.

“I, uh, I guess I should uninvite him to the wedding, eh, Suki?” Sokka’s attempt at a joke made everyone chuckled nervously, but it made Katara smile. That was the closest thing to a Sokka apology she could hope for, given the circumstance.

“I know we were friends with him when we're kids, but he’s not that little boy anymore. This group knows better than any that people change. Sometimes For the worse, other times for the better,” Katara looked at Zuko with her last words. All she wanted was to pull him down for a kiss.

"You’re right,” Sokka sighed. “I should’ve reacted better. I let my impending position and perceived loyalty to the Tribal Council blind me from what actually matters: your happiness.” Suki came up behind Sokka and wrapped an arm around his middle. He smiled down happily at her, then looked back to Katara. “I do want you to be happy, Katara. You too, Zuko. If you make each other happy then… I’ll just have to get used to it,” Sokka said. Katara smiled at him.

“Thanks, Sokka,” Zuko breathed out, and his stature became much more relaxed. Sokka nodded at him before he turned to kiss Suki. Katara knew there would need to be a long conversation with Sokka, with all of them, but baby steps were good enough for now.

"I just... I love you both, and I hope you know what you're doing," Sokka said. His eyes poured into Katara's, trying to tell her something that Katara already knew. 

"We do," Katara smiled, but that might not be the truth. Katara knew that Sokka meant that not everyone would be happy with their relationship. That they'd need to have a strong foundation to make things work long term, and that if they broke up, it could negatively impact friendship and international relations. It plagued her every night, and yet, when Zuko kissed her, it all melted away. She'd make it work if it killed her, and it might. 

She turned to Zuko and tentatively wrapped her arms around his neck. It felt strange to be able to openly hug him like this. His arms wrapped around her middle in the strong, protective way they always did, but something felt off. 

“Not exactly how I wanted to tell everyone,” Katara said against his chest.

“Are you upset that everyone knows?”

“Are you?” Katara asked, suddenly scared that she had made a mistake. She attempted to pull back, but Zuko held her waist and hoisted her up, so they were eye to eye, and her feet dangled down.

“Are you kidding? Katara, I'd tell the entire Fire Nation, one by one, how I feel about you right now.”

"That might take a while." Katara giggled, "We still have a lot to figure out, you know,” Katara whispered, trying not to let her smile interrupt her words.

“I know,” Zuko said, but he was smiling too. He leaned in to kiss her, but Katara closed the gap aggressively. She didn’t think she could be closer to Zuko, but he pulled her in as tightly as he could. Katara had worried that their passion had been rooted in the secret nature of their relationship. She worried that once their friends knew about them, kissing wouldn’t feel as good, but she was so wrong. It felt even better.

“Oh, great, Twinkletoes. Now we have two lovesick couples,” Toph gagged, breaking Zuko and Katara, and Suki and Sokka, out of their respective kisses. 

"It's sweet, Toph," Aang replied.

Katara slid out of Zuko’s arms until her feet rested solidly on stone. As Katara went to lean in again, Sokka let out a groan.

“I know I said I’d get used to you two, but I don’t know if I can handle watching you two suck face,” Sokka said, but Katara could tell he was joking… mostly.

“If I have spent the last 7 years watching you and Suki together, I think you can handle a week more of Zuko and me,” Katara teased. Sokka stuck his tongue out at her like a child, and Katara returned the gesture.

“Right, well now that everyone is aware of the obvious, can we get back to cards now? I would really like to continue beating the Avatar,” Toph said with a maniacal laugh. Katara rolled her eyes, realizing how easily her big revelation was accepted, and subsequently ignored. 

"Sit with me," Zuko requested. As everyone went back to their activities, Katara followed Zuko to his shaded seat. Katara squished in next to him and laid her head on his chest.

"Read to me?" Katara asked. Zuko began to read aloud softly. Katara wasn't sure that the book he'd been reading was particularly interesting, but she was overwhelmingly happy. Katara thought as her lids began to feel heavy as Zuko rubbed circles on her upper arm. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I did decide to make a playlist which you can find [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1q2A6ScDyWUecp8MUduKJ3?si=-ZtfDc_eQqeRTG0gT-IHGw)! It's so much longer than I was expecting lol, but enjoy!!


	18. Baby, We're Fireproof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot believe 8 of you followed my spotify playlist lmaoooo thank you! I'm really excited to be getting down to the wire. I ended up writing more than I thought, so now there will be 26 chapters instead of 24! Enjoy!

**“** Hey, Aang, can I talk to you?”

Aang sat on the thick stone railing of the balcony with his legs over the edge, that jutted out on the cliffside. Momo purred as Aang pet him. Sokka and Suki had gone down to the beach about an hour ago, bringing a reluctant Toph in tow. Katara remained asleep on the chair Zuko had been reading on. Zuko's heart contracted when he left her on the chair. She had been soft and warm and held to him tightly. 

“Sure, Sifu Hotman,” Aang replied, gesturing for Zuko to sit next to him. Zuko nervously crossed his legs over the railing. He was not exactly a fan of unprotected heights, but that was not the real reason Zuko felt jittery. The conversation he was about to have with Aang had the potential to be severely unpleasant. While Katara had been concerned about Sokka’s reception to her and Zuko’s newfound relationship, Zuko was worried about Aang’s.

“Are you okay with Katara and I dating?”

“Am I allowed to have an opinion?” Aang asked indifferently. _Oh no._

“Katara values your opinion more than you know, and I—you were my first real friend, Aang. You’re my best friend. Your happiness and comfort matter to me. I should've talked to you about this before, but I didn't know how to. I know that you had feelings for Katara once. I just want to make sure I’m not stepping on any toes, especially not yours.”

“Would you break up with her if I told you I was uncomfortable?”

“I… No, I don’t think I could, even for you.”

“You love her, don’t you?” Aang asked. Zuko didn't answer. He did love her, but he wasn’t quite ready to admit that yet, especially not to Aang. Aang sighed, then placed a hand on Zuko’s back. “I’m happy for you guys.”

Zuko’s head perked up. “Really?”

“Really. It’s a little weird to see you two together, I’ll admit, but I think this is the way it was meant to be. The Monks always told me, ‘if you love someone set them free. If they don't come back, it wasn’t meant to be.’ I always found it a bit cliché, but it did help me realize that Katara would have never fully belonged to me when part of her longed for you.”

“Katara doesn’t belong to anyone,” Zuko mused dreamily. He loved her independence. Despite being a water bender, she had a fierce, fiery spirit.

“You’re the first guy I’ve seen who hasn’t tried to cage her, including me. Keep setting her free, and I promise she’ll come back to you every time. She always does,” Aang said like he had been expecting this for a long time. Zuko’s heart filled to the brim with something indescribable and warm.

"When did you figure out we were together?" Zuko knew Aang at least assumed his and Katara's feeling for each other after that conversation on the boat. He had no idea Aang actually knew anything was going on, though. 

"Well, I wasn't entirely sure, but you were both so happy as soon as we got here. At first, I thought it was just due to Panuk's absence, but... Toph is right, you two are really obvious. You can't stop smiling at each other." Zuko blushed furiously, losing any semblance of lordly decorum he maybe never had. "Don't be embarrassed. It's sweet." 

“So, no hard feelings?”

“None,” Aang replied with a smile. “I mean, I will be requesting that you name your firstborn after me as a tribute to my good looks and grace, but we can talk about that later,” Aang teased. Zuko shoved him playfully, and they both giggled. A weight lifted off of Zuko’s shoulders. Zuko mentally checked Aang off the list of people he needed to consult with concerning his relationship with Katara. Zuko's advisors, Hakoda, Uncle Iroh. He should probably let Azula and Ozai know too, but then again, what did he owe them? _Hm, anyone else? I feel like I’m missing someone_. A yawn sounded from behind Aang and Zuko. Oh, right, Katara might be the most important person to talk to. 

Footsteps approached Zuko and Aang, who were both still giggling slightly. Out of his peripheral, Zuko saw an arm wrap around Aang. Before he could fully process, a tan arm wrapped around him and pulled him tightly. The smell of waterlily and linens in engulfed him in a familiar and calming way. _Agni, I love how she smells._

“Aw, my two best boys getting along!” Katara cooed, hugging the boys closer.

“Man, don’t let Sokka hear that he’s been demoted to number 3, he’s already trying to process your relationship,” Aang teased.

“Please, Sokka is lucky if he’s number five,” Katara teased back. Aang and Zuko looked at Katara confusedly, unsure who else would pass Sokka on Katara’s list. She rolled her eyes. “Clearly, Momo and Appa outrank him, duh.”

Zuko snorted while Aang howled, falling back onto the balcony in a fit of giggles. Katara smiled proudly. She wrapped both arms around Zuko’s shoulders to hug him from behind. Zuko craned his neck to kiss her briefly.

* * *

The afternoon became sunset, sunset became twilight, twilight became dusk, and without any of them noticing, the sky was freckled with low, shining stars. Dinner was long over, but the fire still roared in front of them. Katara was babbling on about an encounter she and Aang once had with an outlaw in the Earth Kingdom, but Zuko was only half listening. He sat with Katara leaning against him. His arm draped lazily over her shoulders. Being open with his affection for her was even better than when it had been a secret. There was no denying that all the sneaking around was sexy and fun, but now if he wanted to kiss her, he could.

Zuko was never one for public displays of affection, but maybe that was something ingrained into him by his father. His father wasn’t particularly fond of any displayss of affection. His mother loved deeply and wasn’t afraid to show it behind the palace walls. In public, however, she strayed from her normal doting ways to uphold the stature of the Fire Lady that his father wanted.

Even with Mai, Zuko hadn’t shown much affection to her when they were with others unless Mai was kissing him to piss off Azula or somebody else. It was different with Katara, though. He wanted to be near her all the time. He always wanted to have a hand on her or an arm around her; Anything to remind him that she was real and that she wanted him too.

Zuko was surprised by how natural it felt to have Katara in his arms. Zuko wasn't even bothered that the group was there, too. He didn't feel shy as his fingers fiddled with the end of her braid. Of course, Zuko had cuddled her by the fire with them there before, but this time they were together, and everyone knew they were together, and it felt normal. Zuko sighed happily, as Katara cuddled deeper into his side. She turned to look at him with a soft smile.

“What?” She asked.

“You’re cute,” Zuko replied. Katara hummed happily and pecked Zuko’s lips.

“Yuck,” Aang teased. Katara had a habit of sticking her tongue out at Aang whenever he teased her and he had a habit of returning the gesture, however, this time it was Zuko who stuck out his tongue playfully at the Avatar.

“Real royal of you, Zuko,” Sokka teased.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Sokka. Is this royal enough for you?” Zuko lowered all his fingers but one, sending a poignant, sarcastic message.

“Is that how you’re going to treat your future brother-in-law and strongest political ally?” Sokka teased again, but Zuko tensed. _Marriage_. It was definitely a conversation he and Katara needed to have, but it seemed too early for a normal relationship. Zuko realized that nothing about them was normal, but still. “Jeez, relax, Zuko. I was just busting your chops. Tough crowd.” Suki elbowed Sokka in the ribs and mouthed an 'I'm sorry,' but Zuko wasn't sure if it was to him or Katara.

Zuko realized Katara had tensed up at the comment too. Somehow that calmed Zuko down and stressed him out further at the same time. For the first time in nearly 6 years, Zuko and Katara were the first ones to leave the ring around the fire, not the last. They walked silently to the bedrooms. The air around them thickened as they stepped into Zuko’s room. It felt weird not to sneak around, but it felt good, too. Zuko might have let himself enjoy holding the door open for Katara had his nerves not been bitting at him.

“So…” Katara pondered aloud.

“So...” Zuko replied anxiously.

“Look, I’m sorry about my brother, he’s—He never learned how to shut his mouth.” Zuko hummed along as Katara spoke. “Zuko, I hope you know, I’m not expecting anything like that. Not now, at least,” Katara said.

“You do eventually want those things, though. With me, I mean," Zuko said, then held his breath, waiting for the worst.

“Yeah, I do. Do you… You don’t want those things with me?”

“What? No, of course, I do Katara! How could you think I wouldn’t?” Zuko began to panic.

“I don’t know, you just seemed… unenthused when Sokka made those comments. I thought maybe, I don’t know, given your history, it might scare you.” _Shit._

“Kat, of course, I want that with you. Weren’t you the one who said I’m not my father?” Katara looked like she was about to cry. Zuko pulled her down to his lap. He nuzzled his head into her neck and pressed one wet kiss to the tender skin. “I’d elope if I didn’t think your father would kill me,” Zuko whispered, and maybe that was too much. It definitely was, but it was true. 

Katara giggled, and Zuko felt his body shake with relief. 

“Trust me, I don't think you need to worry about your father.”

“I’m sorry I made you feel like I didn’t care about you that way," Zuko said after a brief moment, where they held each other. 

“You didn’t, really. I think I’m just used to the men I date trying to marry me after one night, and as much I hate that, I got kind of scared. I don’t know, it’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid, Kat. I just didn’t want to rush us.”

“Thank you,” Katara whispered, leaning her head on Zuko's. 

“Would you move to the Fire Nation, though?” Zuko asked tentatively. Katara tensed.

“I don't know. I mean, I suppose it depends on what happens with the Tribal Council. If I'm able to keep my ambassadorship, which at this point is doubtful, I'll have to be in Republic City for three weeks for the Building Summit, and I've been away from the Southern Water Tribe for so long this year already. I do love my house in Caldera, and being closer to you sounds nice, but I don't think I could move there full time," Katara said, and Zuko's stature deflated. If she wasn't willing to be in the Fire Nation full time, Zuko didn't think they could work. Zuko suddenly felt even worse. _How can I ask her to leave her home? She's a world leader, what am I thinking?_

"No, right. That makes sense," Zuko sighed.

"Oh, Zuko, I didn't mean that I don't want to, it's just that I don't think I'm ready to leave my real home full time yet. I mean, would you settle for part-time?" Katara asked as she pulled Zuko’s hair out of its topknot and combed through it the way she knew he liked. His eyes closed as he leaned into every touch.

"That wouldn't be settling, Katara." 

"Would you stay with me in the Southern Water Tribe for a bit? I know you're busy, but I'd love to show you where I grew up," Katara shyly asked. 

"Name the date. I'll cancel all my meetings," Zuko whispered. Katara smiled before she kissed Zuko softly. 

"You should come to Republic City during the Building Summit regardless of your Ambassador Status. I'd love to see you."

"You're seeing me now," Katara laughed. "But okay."

“Well, I like the idea of seeing you every day.”

“Every day? I think you might be ever so slightly too busy for that, or did you forget that you’re the Fire Lord?”

“Ask me to step down.”

“And why would I do that? I’m only dating you for my own ascendancy,” Katara pestered. Zuko laughed as he tossed Katara gently back onto the mattress. He kissed down her chin to her neck, causing Katara to moan quietly. She pulled on his hair to grab his attention. He pulled off her neck to look her in the eye. “When did you realized you like me?”

“Honest answer?”

“No, I want you to lie,” Katara teased.

“Remember that time in the caves of Ba Sing Se?” 

Katara gasped, "That long?"

“On some level since then, but I think I realized I had genuine feelings after you left the Fire Nation to go with Aang.”

“I wish I had stayed. I wish I had known I wanted to stay.”

“It was your destiny to go,” Zuko sighed. He brought his lips back down to Katara’s neck. He had spent far too much time dwelling on what could have been. Zuko let out a breathy chuckle. Two weeks ago, Katara had been some unattainable pipedream, and tonight she was going to fall asleep in his bed.

“If I hadn’t, do you think we would’ve gotten together earlier?”

“Maybe, but you have no idea how much you terrified me back then.”

“Me? Why?”

“You’ve just always been so sure of yourself. You were so kind, and beautiful, and I was… awkward. It didn’t help that Aang was in love with you. How could I compete?”

Katara rolled her eyes. “Had you tried, you would’ve won. I love Aang, I do, and I’m so grateful he was my first relationship because it was so sweet, but had you asked, I would’ve been yours.”

Zuko couldn't help the blush and smile that took up his face. Katara's chest heaved under his feathery touches. How lucky he was to see this. 

“Did you and Aang ever…” Zuko trailed off, moving his hand dangerously close to Katara’s waistband.

Katara gasped. “Ew, Zuko, no! We were literal children. No! Absolutely not!” 

“Good,” Zuko said smugly. “I’d like to have at least one thing over the Avatar,” Zuko joked, taking her lips into his. His finger, which had been ghosting her sex dipped below the satin shorts she wore, and she was putty in his hands after that. 

They stayed up talking until neither of them could keep their eyes open. It was the first night that Zuko couldn’t be sure who fell asleep first. His face was full of Katara’s hair, and it was a wondrous annoyance. He had never been more comfortable. 

A sound woke them both up hours later.

_Boom._

_Boom._

_Boom._

Crashed from the hillside thundered through the halls of Zuko’s home. Zuko shot out of bed, and Katara was quick to follow him. They stared at each other, unsure of what was going on.

The floor shook.

Whatever was making noise on the hillside had reached the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really curious... how old are y'all? I feel like the ATLA fanbase ranges SO much in age, I'm curious to know how old my readers are hahahah


	19. Bad Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no self control, enjoy this extra chapter! Ahahahaha this chapter was really challenging, but sooooo fun to write! TW for violence, but it's not graphic!

“Aang, what’s going on?” Katara yelled once she had reached the hallway.

“I don’t know! I think we’re under attack!” Aang grabbed his glider and started running towards the courtyard.

Katara and Zuko followed after him, both attempting to make themselves battle-ready. Katara tied her pants tightly around her waist and pulled her hair back while Zuko put his hair up and shoved his swords into the carrier on his back. The noise had awoken Sokka, Suki, and Toph, too. The group met in the courtyard, ready to fight whatever had been attacking. They were met with silence.

“What’s happening?” Suki asked.

“I don’t know, I’m going to try and get a look at what’s happening!” Aang exclaimed, grabbing his glider, and kicking off the ground. He soared upward until he disappeared behind the building. _Be safe,_ Katara thought, just before he disappeared beyond her line of sight. 

“Toph, can you sense anything?” Sokka asked.

“No, nothing!”

“Let’s see if we can see anything from the balcony!” Katara grabbed Zuko’s hand and pulled him along. On the balcony, they looked down over the town and towards the small, private cove. A similarly sized, yet considerably less impressive, boat floated on the water next to Zuko’s ship.

“Whose boat is that?” Katara asked.

“Dunno, it’s not Watertribe,” Sokka said.

“It’s not Fire Nation either,” Zuko added.

“It’s Earth Kingdom,” Suki said, as perplexed as the rest of them.

Before they could process and question the Earth Kingdom boat, the boat launched a large boulder towards them. Zuko dove over Katara, protecting her from the inevitable blow. The boulder narrowly missed the group, skidding to a halt against the archways that led to the courtyard. Rocks hurtled down over them, but Aang created a dome of air to protect them. Katara shoved Zuko off of her. She appreciated the sentiment, but she could take care of herself. If he was focused on her during the battle, he’d leave himself vulnerable.

“Why would the Earth Kingdom be attacking us?” Katara shouted over the sound of rubble crashing around them.

“It’s not the Earth Kingdom,” Aang said, landing gracefully on the balcony. “It’s Panuk.”

“What?” They all screamed, trading nervous stares. 

Katara shared a glance with Zuko, who seemed worried, and oddly like he had been expecting this. Katara was nervous, too, but she was mainly furious. Panuk was relentlessly detached from reality. What did he expect was going to happen? He was going to attack, and Katara was just going to flock to him? Unless… unless he didn’t plan on taking Katara willingly. 

“Seems like someone didn’t take Sugar Queen’s rejection very well,” Toph cackled.

“It’s not funny, Toph! He told me I’d regret rejecting him. He’s unhinged!”

“He never did take losing very well,” Sokka said, staring at Zuko. Katara’s heart rate accelerated. Katara’s eyes widened as she stared at Zuko. Zuko seemed to know what she was thinking.

“He won’t do anything to me, Katara. Not if he doesn’t want to start another war.”

“What if he does want another war, though? The first night he was here, he talked about you needing to ‘answer for your mistakes,' and then he told me that you attacking him would be viewed as an act of war, but what if that’s what he wants? What if he's fulfilling some testosterone-fueled revenge fantasy?”

“Then we’ll stop him,” Aang said. Katara hadn’t taken her eyes off of Zuko. She tried to read his emotions, but his face was resolute, the way it always seemed to be during a crisis. _Must be a Fire Lord technique to save face,_ Katara thought.

“Yeah, we ended one war together, what’s another under our belt?” Toph asked. Katara beamed with a mixture of love and pride. She grabbed Zuko’s hand and gave it a squeeze, which he returned with a nervous smile.

“So, what do we do?” Zuko asked Sokka.

“Why are you asking me?” Sokka questioned.

“Cause you’re the ideas guy,” Toph added.

“And exactly how many times have my plans worked?”

“Zero, but they’re a good starting point,” Zuko replied, clapping Sokka on the back.

Sokka smiled, but not a real smile. It was a mixture of pride and anxiety. “Okay, well, if Panuk is here to enact revenge on Katara and Zuko, then we need to keep you guys protected, and far away from the edge. You two watch each other’s backs over by that fountain. Hopefully, you two won’t even need to attack. How many people does Panku have with him, Aang?”

“At least 40, from what I saw!”

“Right. Toph, I need you to send as much force down the Cliffside as you can. The fewer people who make it up here, the less we have to actually fight. Suki, you get on the roof and protect the backside in case Panuk has a secret battalion coming from the north. I’ll help you if need, and work to protect Katara and Zuko. Aang, you go wherever you’re needed most!”

Katara smiled at Sokka. She’d known that Sokka had always been an overzealous, but brilliant tactical mind, but he’d really grown into a true strategist. This plan might actually work.

“Just like old times, eh?” Zuko asked, trying to relieve some of the tension as they walked to the fountain. Being near water would be advantageous for Katara. Zuko was a powerful bender, but being nighttime and all, he was already at a disadvantage. Especially if Panuk brought water benders with him. Katara assumed he did.

“It’s a full moon,” Katara said, slightly ignoring Zuko’s question.

“Yeah?” Zuko questioned awkwardly. He didn’t understand, and for that, Katara was glad.

“Never mind.” Katara wrapped her arms around Zuko’s neck. He pulled her into his chest, placing his face in the crook of her neck. He muttered something into that space that she could not quite hear, but she was almost sure she knew. She felt the same, but she could not bring herself to say it. If she said it now, it would be an adrenalin response, wouldn’t it? Real, but based on fear, not the feeling itself.

Katara pulled back. She was ready to lean forward and kiss him, but another boulder came barreling towards them. Aang jumped into the air to blast the boulder away with air. Katara winced.

“They’re coming up the mountain!” Toph yelled.

Katara watched as everyone readied their stance. Suki kissed Sokka firmly before grabbing onto the gutter groove and swinging herself onto the rooftop. Katara closed her eyes to center herself. As she grounded her feet, she heard the sound of Toph shedding the mountainside and the sound of her delirious laugh. Above her, she heard Suki’s feet pacing, waiting for an attack from behind.

“They’re coming from the front of the house, too!” Suki shouted. Katara opened her eyes. Sokka ran passed Zuko and Katara, through the archways, and into the courtyard. He was met with a swordsman. Aang helped Toph ward off the people climbing up the sides.

“We have to help them!” Katara pleaded with Zuko.

“No!” Zuko said. Katara glared at him. “No, we should do what Sokka said, Kat. It’s in our best interest to stay together and to not put ourselves in more immediate danger.”

“Yeah, “Kat,” listen to the Fire Lord,” A chillingly familiar voice called from the shadows of the corridor. Zuko ushered Katara behind him as they turned to face the owner of the ominous voice. “Aw, don’t be shy, Katara. _I’m_ certainly not going to hurt you.”

“What are you doing here, Panuk?” Katara sneered.

“I did tell you I’d make your life a waking nightmare, did I not?” Panuk leaned coolly against a stone pillar. “And you, all mighty, Fire Lord, I thought I told you to stay away from Katara.”

“You didn’t answer my question," Katara asserted. Her anger boiled. 

“I’m here, _Kat_ ,” Panuk spit out the nickname only Zuko ever called her, “to take what is rightfully mine.”

"Yours?" Katara cackled, nervously and high-pitched. "Panuk, I told you I'm don't, nor will I ever belong to you! No matter what the council has to say."

"You're wrong, Katara. Whether or not you want to, you're mine."

""I thought I told you that you can’t treat Katara like she’s property,” Zuko shouted, shooting flames at Panuk, who effortlessly somersaulted out of the way of the heat.

“It’s sweet that you have your boyfriend fighting your battles for you know, Katara. Too bad, this fairytale will be short-lived.” Panuk shot a boomerang at Zuko, but Katara spotted it mid-air and encased it in ice. The sounds of her friends fighting Panuk’s cronies made Katara nervous.

“I’m perfectly capable of fighting for myself, Panuk. I thought I taught you that lesson last time.” From the corner of her eye, she could see Zuko grinning at her. “What did you hope to accomplish by coming here? I mean, really, did you think I was just going to run into your arms as you attack my friends?”

“No, I figured you’d put up a fight, but that just makes this all the more fun,” Panuk sniggered. Zuko prepared to strike again, but Katara placed her hand over his forearm and lowered it. He stared at her confusedly. As much as Katara wanted to watch Zuko char Panuk, she needed answers.

“Why me, Panuk? What makes me so special? I mean, there have to be hundreds of beautiful girls in the Northern Water Tribe that would want to be with you. What is your fixation with me?”

“There’s _nothing_ special about you, Katara, but you have powerful friends and bending abilities, and that makes you special in the eyes of the Tribal Council. I had the best once, you don’t even remotely measure up, but unlike you, I follow through on my orders from the Tribal Council.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I was promised you, and you rejected me. No one rejects me. You turned this into a game. You are prey, Katara, and when I finally capture you, you’ll be gagged and mounted on my wall as the prized catch of a lifetime,” Panuk hissed.

Both Katara and Zuko sent blasts of their respective elements towards Panuk, who jumped up to dodge their attacks. Not that he had much to dodge. Their streams of fire and water intertwined and created a vat of steam.

Panuk laughed as Katara continued to send blasts of water at him. Panuk sent another boomerang towards Katara, which narrowly missed her shoulder but snagged on her shirt and sent her flying backward towards the ivy-covered wall. Sokka’s boomerang ricocheted off of Panuk's, setting her free. 

“Thanks!” Katara yelled into the void, unsure exactly where her brother was. 

“No problem!” 

A dagger pulled her back this time, but she pulled herself free. Zuko shot flames at Panuk, who laughed again. 

“Oh, Zuko. You’re so busy focusing on me, but you’ve left your people vulnerable.” 

“What?” Zuko yelled.

“You didn’t think I’d anchor that close to your ship without attacking, did you?” 

“Zuko’s crew is innocent! You wouldn’t,” Katara said. An explosion sounded from the cove. Zuko’s eyes went wide as did Katara’s.

“Wouldn’t I? No one in the Fire Nation is innocent, Katara. So, who’s it going to be Zuko: Your girl or your crew?” 

Zuko looked at Katara. She could see the conflict swimming behind his eyes. If he was not going to make the decision, she would make it for him. 

“Go!” Katara yelled

“No, I can’t leave you here.” 

“And you can’t leave your crew unprotected! Go, I’ll be fine!” Katara screamed. 

“I’ll be back,” Zuko said, climbing over the balcony's railing. 

“You better,” Katara said, trying to smile, but she was worried. Zuko nodded at her one last time before dropping off the balcony to go to his ship. 

“Well, that was just touching,” Panuk tormented. Katara’s eyes darkened. “Unfortunately, he just walked right into my trap.”

“What?” Katara asked, chest tightening.

“I’ve always heard that the Fire Lord was honorable. I figured, given a choice between you, a powerful bender, and his mostly unarmed crew, he’d chose the latter. Stupid decision, really. My men don’t plan on attacking the Fire Lord’s crew, just the Fire Lord himself.”

“You’re evil!” Katara bawled, tears threatening to spill.

“No, Katara. I’m justice.”

“This isn't justice, Panuk. This is ill-concealed revenge for something you have no stake in."

"I have plenty of reasons to want revenge on that monster."

"So, your plan was to come here, capture me, and kill Zuko? How do you plan to get away with that? Whatever story you have planned, no one will believe you over the Avatar,” Katara chided. Katara and Panuk began pacing in a large circle around the fountain. 

“No, they won’t, but I imagine your friends will see things my way.”

“What makes you so sure?”

“It’s their compliance or your life.”

“Excuse me? I thought I was the end goal of this whole fight, and now you’re threatening to kill me?” 

“You’re just the consolation prize, Katara. This fight will need to have some casualties to be realistic. I imagine your brother will have to go, he’d put up the most fight. Can't say I'll be that sad to see him go. Childhood friendships don't run as deep as I thought they did. Aang won’t be easy to kill, but he’d do anything to protect you, wouldn’t he? I’ll spare the Earth Kingdom girls so long as they comply,” Panuk smiled as he spoke of killing her friends. The knot in Katara’s stomach and the lump in her throat hardened. Panuk was deranged. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Katara sobbed.

“I’ve got a score to settle! The Fire Lord must pay for his actions. He’ll die knowing you’ll live miserably, and maybe then he’ll understand what it’s like!” Panuk shrieked.

“Panuk,” Katara cried, tears spilling over her cheeks, white-hot. “I don’t understand! You have a vendetta against Zuko, but why? I thought it was jealously, but clearly, you don’t care for me. What is it about Zuko? Why do you hate him so much?” Katara’s voice was horse from screaming. She wanted to understand, but she was afraid of what he’d say next.

"How can you love him after all he did to our people?"

"Zuko is not his father, Panuk. Ozai's sins are not Zuko's. Zuko didn't do anything to our people." 

“He did, and it’s his fault that she’s dead!” Panuk Yelled, and he was crying now too. Katara stopped pacing and stared at Panuk, dumbfounded. She began to connect the dots.

“No…” Katara gasped. “You were in love with Yue.” Panuk let out a choked sob. “But… I thought she had been betrothed to Hahn before…”

“Before your brother swooped in and messed everything up? She had been. Hahn didn’t deserve her, and neither did your brother. Yue loved me, but she had to do what was expected of her. She loved me but risked everything for you, and your stupid brother, but it’s Zuko’s fault that she's gone!” Panuk yelled.

Katara actually felt sympathy for the guy. She knew what it was like to want revenge after losing someone you cared about, and she knew that it didn’t help. Katara took a deep breath to center herself. _Spirits, give me strength._

“Panuk, killing Zuko and Sokka isn’t going to fix anything. Neither is imprisoning me. Yue didn't sacrifice herself for Sokka and me. She sacrificed herself for the good of our people; all people, really. She’s a hero.” Panuk unsheathed his sword and gripped it tightly. His chest heaved as he stared at Katara. “Panuk put the sword down. Yue wouldn’t want you to become like this.”

“You didn’t know her!” Panuk screamed.

He charged towards Katara, blade first. She ducked then jumped into the fountain, bending the water into steps to catapult her to safety on the other side. Panuk turned around a fury in his eyes. Katara looked for her friends, who were all engrossed in combat. They looked tired, their faces partially illuminated by both the moon and by the faint, distant glow of the fire from the cove below them. Her heart rate accelerated thinking of Zuko, who was fighting alone. She had to help everyone, and there was only one way to do that.

Katara looked up at the full moon, already ashamed of what she was about to do. _I’m sorry, Yue, but I think I need your help._ As Panuk started to charge again, Katara took a deep breath. She brought her hand up between her eyes and focused on Panuk. As she lowered her fingers, Panuk’s knees buckled.

“What’s going on?” He asked. Katara didn’t respond. She continued to force him down to the ground. She closed her eyes and brought her hands out to a T-position. She repeated the hand motion as her hair whipped in the wind. The sounds of fighting stopped and were replaced by confused cries and moans.

“What’s happening?” Suki asked from the roof.

“Katara’s happening,” Aang replied. Katara exhibited more strength than she ever had, but she felt weak. There was more than one reason she had previously disavowed blood bending. Morally, she knew it was wrong, but it also required a vigor Katara couldn’t regularly demonstrate.

“Quick, restrain them! Katara can’t hold them like this for long!” Sokka yelled. Katara held Panuk and his crew down for what felt like ages. Her breath shallowed, sweat dripped from her brow, and she clenched her teeth. 

A hand finally touched Katara's shoulder right as she thought she might reach her breaking point.

“They’re restrained, Katara. Let go,” Aang whispered. Katara collapsed into Aang’s arms, sobbing.

“Zuko,” She muttered.

“What?” Aang asked.

“We have to help him. It was a trap. He’s in danger.”

“You’ll be too late,” Panuk whispered, still a little disoriented from Katara’s control.

“We’ll help him. You should wait here,” Aang said. Katara protested, gripping onto Aang's robe, and staring at him desperately. Aang begrudgingly helped Katara onto Appa. Toph and Suki followed them onto Appa’s saddle. Suki gripped Katara's hand in a comforting way, but she seemed afraid of Katara, which made sense. Katara was a little afraid of herself. She hated that she had to do that.

“Sokka, are you coming?” Toph asked. Katara realized that her brother hadn’t moved from his place in front of Panuk. He didn’t turn around.

“No, someone needs to watch these guys, and I need to have a little chitchat here with the man of the hour.”

Katara didn’t like the inflection in Sokka’s voice, but she was too tired to care that much. She assumed Sokka had heard Panuk's rant about Yue, and if there was one thing Sokka was sensitive about, it was his girl in the moon. She saw Suki frown uncomfortably. She wanted to dissect that moment, but she could only think about Zuko. She hoped he was okay.

“Appa, yip yip!” Aang exclaimed. The bison took off, zooming straight down toward the cove. The fire was still blasting in increments. _That’s a good sign_ , Katara thought. When she looked down, however, it wasn’t Zuko who was sending the fire blasts; it was Ming Lee. Katara’s blood ran cold. She scanned the ship for Zuko. She found him sprawled on the deck, with blood bleeding through his shirt. He was breathing, at least she thought, but barely.

Katara let out a bloodcurdling shriek. Appa landed with a thud. Before Panuk’s cronies could react, Katara brought her arms back to the T-position to bend them into submission. They yelped and cried as their knees collided with the wood of the deck. She bloodbended them further into the wood. She heard the deck crackle under the weight.

“Katara! Katara, stop! They’re restrained! You can stop,” Toph yelled.

Katara released. When she opened her eyes, everything was blurry. Dark spots clouded her vision. She took one more look at Zuko, then crumbled onto Appa’s saddle.

Everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was not expecting such a wide range of ages from you guys, but as I said to many of you, that's just a testament to how incredible the show is! As for me, I'm 22 :)


	20. Frozen, But The World Still Turns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried not to keep you waiting too long! Time to deal with the consequences of prince crazy lol

Zuko’s side ached. He tried to open his eyes, but they seemed to be glued shut from sleep. When he finally got them open, everything was blurry. Zuko blinked the blurriness away slowly to realize he wasn’t in his own bed. This bed was small and stiff. The room was unfamiliar, too. When he tried to sit up, a sharp pain shot through his ribs.

“Ah,” He moaned, gripping his side through a thick, white bandage. He looked down to see a small, rusty, red stain on the bandage: Blood.

“Be careful,” Aang pleaded in the chair next to the bed Zuko had been laying on. Aang’s voice startled him.

“What happened? Where am I? Where’s Panuk? Where’s Katara?”

“Woah, slow down,” Aang hushed, handing Zuko a glass of water. Zuko hadn’t realized how dry his lips, mouth, and throat were. Zuko took the water in his shaky palms. “What’s the last thing you remember?”

“I was fighting about 20 earth and water benders who were threatening my crew. Ming Lee was down with a hurt ankle. I couldn’t take on all of them at once, not when I had to worry about counterattacks for two elements, and a boulder hit me pretty hard and then… that’s it. It all goes kind of fuzzy after that,” Zuko sighed. Zuko could only see fragments of the fight. Small windows that revealed fire and ice. “Aang, where are we? Where’s my ship? My crew? What about Katara?” Zuko asked nervously.

“Your crew is fine! Just a little shaken up. A few scrapes and such, but fine. Your ship was pretty damaged, so we brought it to the Ember Island port for repairs and sailed out on the Earth Kingdom ship Panuk attacked from.”

“I’m confused,” Zuko admitted. “Where are we going? Where’s Katara?” His head felt hazy. His ribs and neck throbbed. He could barely focus on his own words, but he knew Aang had ignored his question about Katara thrice, and that made him feel worse.

“You got hit pretty hard on your left side. We think you have a few broken ribs, and you ended up hitting your head, too. Panuk surrendered... sort of. He and his crew are our prisoners, for all intents and purposes. We’re heading to the Northern Water Tribe to turn him in.”

“What do you mean by 'sort of?' And for Agni’s sake, Aang, I know that I’m damaged right now, but if you don’t tell me where Katara is I swear I’ll— “

“She’s resting!” Aang interrupted. Zuko felt somewhat better, but he could tell Aang was hiding something. Zuko stared at Aang blankly until Aang spoke again. “Katara was able to distract Panuk and his crew long enough for us to detain them, but what she had to do to get there took all of her strength. It was a forced surrender.”

“I need to see her.”

“No, you don’t understand. It took _all_ of Katara's strength. She collapsed as soon as she finished, uh... doing what she did,” Aang said, but he didn’t meet Zuko’s eyes.

“She didn’t… bloodbend, did she?” Zuko hoped the answer was no, but he knew that wasn’t the truth. Aang merely nodded. “Shit. She’s going to absolutely hate herself when she wakes,” Zuko said.

He recalled the first time he witnessed bloodbending. It scared and impressed him in ways he’d never been able to explain. Upon seeing Katara’s blood bending abilities, Zuko realized what a force Katara truly was. It was then that he first realized that the fluttering he felt around her might be actual attraction and not just a crush. It wasn’t because of her ability, but rather the restraint she showed. She could blood bend whenever she wanted (moon phase allowing), to destroy any enemy, but she chose not to. Her moral compass was fiercer than most. Katara spent most of the flight home on Appa confiding in Zuko about how awful blood bending made her feel.

“That’s the thing,” Aang stared. Zuko’s palms began to sweat as his nerves crept back into his psyche. “She’s been in and out of consciousness. Even when she’s awake, she’s pretty out of it. We’re going to take her to Yugoda as soon as we get to the Northern Water Tribe to see if she can help her. We think she just needs rest, but we don’t know.”

“How long have I been out?” Zuko asked.

“About two days.” _Two?_ What the fuck? How could they even be sure he was going to wake up? The nervous relief on Aang's face told Zuko that they weren't sure he would. 

“I need to see her,” Zuko tried to get out of bed, but the feeling in his ribs stalled him. He moaned in agony.

“No, Zuko. You both need to rest,” Aang replied. Zuko felt impotent and a little peeved. He was the Fire Lord, for Agni’s sake, he should be allowed to see his girlfriend if he wanted to, and neither broken ribs nor the Avatar should stop him. Aang pressed Zuko back down onto the mattress softly, and Zuko knew that wasn’t true, especially the latter condition. He’d do whatever Aang asked of him, even if it meant suffering in an uncomfortable bed, wondering if Katara was okay.

The door to the tiny room they were in swung open. Suki stood in the doorway, picking nervously at her nails.

“Hey, Aang. Katara’s up and talking if you want to go see her. I can spend time with—“ Suki looked up at the bed. Her jaw dropped upon seeing Zuko awake. “—Zuko!” She screamed.

Suki came flying at Zuko with a gusto. She flung herself on Zuko, hugging him tightly. Zuko accepted the hug happily but groaned as Suki’s body made contact with his tender side.

“Shit, sorry! I forgot about your ribs. I’m just so happy that you’re awake,” Suki smiled.

“It’s fine,” Zuko smiled back.

“Oh, Katara will be so happy you’re okay! She’s been lamenting about you nonstop. Do you want to come to see her?”

Zuko shot a smug glance at Aang, who rolled his eyes.

"Please," Zuko smiled at Suki.

“Just be careful, you’re still healing, and so is she. We don’t know how long she’ll stay awake, so don’t get your hopes up,” Aang sighed, helping Zuko out of bed. Once Zuko was upright, the pain subsided, for the most part. He couldn’t make any sudden movements, his head still throbbed, and any deep breath would send him flying to the floor, but other than that: pain-free. He hobbled with Aang’s support down a small corridor. At the end of the hall, Aang knocked slightly on an ornate wooden door. Toph opened the door.

“Sparky!” She cooed, sensing Zuko’s presence. Zuko smiled at her before realizing that wouldn’t do anything.

“Hey, Toph,” He said.

“Zuko?” Katara’s voice timidly called from the bed. Katara didn’t look great. She was still beautiful, but her hair was frizzy and lacked its usual, effervescent bounce. Her skin was dull, and her eyes were sunken in. When she saw Zuko’s face, she smiled. Her eyes still twinkled. “Zuko!” She called again, this time more excited.

“Kat,” Zuko breathed out. Zuko wanted to cry. No, he was crying. He could not help the tears that streamed out of his eyes. Katara was crying a little too. Zuko slowly made his way over to her. Sokka stared at Zuko with something he couldn't read. Zuko tried to smile, but Sokka just looked... sullen. 

"Be careful," Sokka quipped when Zuko reached for Katara's hand. Zuko pulled back, afraid of Sokka's tone.

"Sokka it's fine," Katara sighed.

Sokka sighed, getting up from his chair to give Zuko more room. "You'll know where to find me," Sokka said, leaving the room, quickly, and bringing Suki with him. That was weird behavior, even for Sokka, but Zuko did not have time to worry about Sokka when Katara was staring up at him with watering eyes.

“Why don’t we give these two lovebirds some space,” Toph suggested. “I can’t handle the mush.”

“Katara, will be on deck if you need anything, okay?” Aang said. _Gee, what if I need something?_ Zuko sarcastically thought. Under any other circumstance, he might even tease Aang, but he couldn’t focus on anything other than Katara. Katara nodded, and Aang pulled the door shut behind him. Zuko was alone with Katara. If his ribs weren’t aching, he’d be in bed with her, holding her to his chest, just to prove to himself that she was okay.

Zuko reached his hand out to touch Katara’s cheek. His thumb brushed away a few tears. Katara leaned into the touch. She brought her hand up to meet his and held his hand against her cheek like she was afraid he was going to leave. Then, gently, she pressed a warm kiss into his palm. Zuko had so much he wanted to say, but he didn’t know where to begin.

“How’re you feeling?” That felt like a safe place to start.

“Exhausted. Horrible. Better now that you’re here. Zuko I…” Katara’s body retched as she broke into a wailing sob. Her body convulsed as the cries rippled through her. Zuko’s heart broke.

Zuko swallowed his pain to sit on the bed next to Katara. He winced and whimpered as his bones rubbed together as he scooted Katara to the side to give him more room. She moved, willingly, still uncontrollably crying. Zuko controlled his breath, trying to focus on Katara instead of the sharp sting he felt. He pulled her into his chest and hugged her as tightly as his broken body would allow. She gripped at his shoulder and neck as if trying to ground herself to him.

“Katara, what’s wrong?” Zuko asked.

“I thought I lost you. I thought you… you looked _dead_ on the boat. I thought I had been too late. No one would tell me if you were okay. I just—I was terrified,” Katara sputtered out as she tried to regain control of her breath.

“I’m okay, Katara. I’m here. It’s okay,” Zuko soothed continuously into Katara's hair. 

Katara’s breathing slowed. She didn’t say anything for a long time, nor did Zuko. The silence was oddly pleasant. It communicated everything they’d always wanted to say. Just being together was enough. 

Eventually, though, Katara spoke. “I’m glad that you’re okay. I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t.”

“After the boulder hit me, all I could think about was you. I know I should’ve been worried about my crew and the future of the Fire Nation, but as I was fading out, it was only you,” Zuko admitted. He was being so sappy, but he didn’t really care. He grew up in a family that didn’t show emotions often. Mai never let him talk about his feelings, and that might have been the demise of their relationship; of all of his relationships, really. He wasn’t going to let poor communication destroy this one too.

“A boulder hit you?” Katara asked, slowly propping herself up.

“That’s what you got out of what I just told you?” Zuko was teasing… kind of. Katara leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Zuko’s lips. Zuko’s eyes were still closed, savoring the euphoric feeling of Katara’s lips when he continued. “Yeah, a boulder hit me. Aang said I might have a few broken ribs.”

Katara’s hand touched the bandage adorning Zuko’s abdomen. She gasped. “Oh, My Love…” She whispered. Zuko’s eyes shot open at the nickname. He could definitely get used to Katara calling him that. “I can fix that if you bring me water,” Katara offered.

“No, you need to rest!” Zuko protested and Katara ducked her head. A pink rose to her cheeks. She looked away from Zuko.

“You heard about what I did then?”

“I… yeah. Aang told me. I don’t really know what happened, but I know that it must have been pretty bad if you did that.” Katara was crying again. Zuko pulled her back down into his arms. “Hey, it’s okay. You did what you had to do to protect the people you care about.”

“Maybe, but that doesn’t make me any less of a monster,” Katara groaned into Zuko’s neck.

“Hey, look at me,” Zuko demanded. Katara looked up at him. Her eyes were even bluer than usual. “You’re not a monster. Trust me, I’ve met monsters; I’ve been a monster. But you? You’re the furthest thing from it.” Katara hummed quietly, unconvinced. “Katara, why was Panuk attacking?”

“Because he was—still is—in love with Yue. He blamed you—all of us, really—for her death,” Katara eventually said. She sat up and tucked her knees to her chest.

“Wait, like Moon Spirit Yue?” Zuko asked in disbelief.

“Yeah.”

“But I thought was Sokka’s girlfriend before she turned into the moon?” Zuko asked. Zuko started to understand why Sokka was in such a bad mood. Sokka rarely spoke of Yue, but in times he did, it was clear to Zuko how important she was to Sokka. Panuk's actions couldn't have been easy on Sokka. 

“She was kind of. They were both so young, but I guess you could say she was Sokka's girlfriend. Yue was betrothed to a military officer named Hahn, but she and Panuk must have been together beforehand in secret. Then Sokka, Aang, and I came to the Northern Water tribe, and Sokka and Yue fell hard for each other.”

“So he watched the girl he was in love with being forced into an arranged marriage and still tried to do the same thing to you?” Zuko asked. “What a tool.”

Katara laughed a dry, unemotional laugh. “I know, but he was angry, and I personified everything he’s angry about. If I hadn’t rejected him, and if I hadn’t rejected him for you, he might not be so angry. Trapping me in something awful must have seemed like justice to him. In his mind, we all killed Yue.”

“But didn’t she sacrifice herself?” Zuko had heard the story, but he wasn’t exactly following.

“Yes, but it’s why she had to that Panuk blames us for. He hates Sokka because Yue was willing to break the terms of her engagement for him, but not for Panuk. He hates me because I brought Aang to the North Pole, which in turn brought you, and that brought Zhao, who killed Tui, who Yue replaced. I mean, I get where he’s coming from, I guess, but his logic is deeply flawed and one-sided.”

“The sins of my past,” Zuko muttered, remembering the night Panuk threatened him.

“What?” Katara asked.

“That night on my ship that Panuk told me to stay away from you, he told me that one day the sins of my past would catch up to me. I can only assume he meant this. It’s my fault, even if indirectly, that Yue is gone,” Zuko sighed, letting his head hang low.

Zuko wasn’t proud of his past, but he was proud of where it led him. Rarely did he let his mistakes weigh him down, but this one felt heavy. Katara could’ve died; she would have become another name to add to his ledger of bad deeds that would haunt his darkest nightmares. If that had happened, he wouldn’t have been able to live with himself.

“Katara, I’m so sorry,” Zuko said, tears threatening to spill. 

“No! Hey, it’s not your fault.” Katara wrapped her arms around him tightly. His boned cracked under the pressure, and for a minute, Zuko let himself think he deserved the pain.

“It is, though. How can you, or anyone from the Joint Water Tribes, even stand to look at me?”

“Because I know your heart, Zuko, and because I know, and the tribe knows, that Yue wasn’t forced to do anything. Her duty was to serve her people, and she did that in the best way possible: by sacrificing herself for them. That’s the mark of a good leader. She’s a hero to us all. The tribe doesn’t blame you, Zuko; they blame Zhao. The whole Northern Water Tribe knows that your Uncle had tried to stop Zhao, and his actions reflect your character better than Zhao’s.” Zuko was crying. He felt pathetic. “Hey, look at me,” Katara asked, pulling Zuko’s chin up to meet his. “Not your fault, okay?”

“Okay,” Zuko whispered, unconvinced. Tears still spilled out of his eyes, but slower now. Katara held him as he calmed down. She pressed soft, light kisses into this bare, bruised shoulder and neck.

“Also, the fact that you publicly called your father a bitch at the first Peace Accords really won a lot of people over,” Katara teased, trying to lighten the mood. Zuko snorted, despite himself.

“Katara, I love you,” Zuko blurted out.

Zuko went rigid at his confession. He hadn’t meant to say that. It was true, but he knew that you don’t just tell the girl you’ve been dating for two weeks that you love her. Only crazy people do that. He had said it to her before. When she was asleep, or into her skin when she undressed for him, and right before the battle, but never where she could hear it. It was supposed to just be his secret. Katara was silent, and that scared Zuko even more.

Zuko snuck a glance at Katara. She was staring at him, radiantly. He gave her a perplexed look, which made her giggle.

“You didn’t mean to say that, did you?” She asked. She was still smiling.

Zuko sighed. “No, but it’s true. You don’t have to say it back. I’m not expecting that yet. I just… yeah, I love you, and I have for… Agni, pretty much since I was 16.”

“I love you, too, idiot,” Katara said. Before Zuko could question her, her lips attacked his. Though the pain, he licked into her mouth and pulled her deeper into his chest. He wanted to roll his hips up into hers, which ground down onto his, but he didn’t have the strength. Sex would have to wait until they were both strong enough, but for now, knowing she loved him back was better than a measly orgasm.

“You should rest,” Zuko whispered in between kisses. Katara groaned in detest but rolled off of him anyway.

“Stay with me,” Katara said. It wasn’t a request, and Zuko was in no place to deny her either way. Katara placed her head on his chest and traced circles on his opposite shoulder. “You’re not a monster, Zuko. You never were. Not even close.”

“You’re just saying that because you love me,” Zuko joked. It didn’t land, not after the conversation they just had, but Zuko didn’t care. Katara _loved_ him.

“I’m saying that because it’s true. The real monster was your father, and you were an unwitting pawn in his game. I don’t care what you or anyone else thinks. You’re not a monster.” Katara’s voice was weak. She was falling back to sleep even as she spoke. He didn’t believe her, but that wasn’t her fault.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I started my grad program yesterday and I'm so busy already but I promise to update regularly still :)


	21. Cascade Ocean Wave Blues Come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh sorry this was kind of late, I've been crazy busy, but enjoy!!!

Zuko stirred. The sound of waves lapping against the boat woke him. There were no windows in this room, so Zuko couldn’t be sure what time it was, but he assumed it was morning. Zuko rolled over, but the other side of the bed felt cold and empty. With his eyes still closed, Zuko felt around for Katara in the sheets, but she wasn't there. Zuko sat up abruptly. His heart rate sped up modestly. Had something happened in the night? No. Someone would have woken him. _Where is she?_ Before panic could fully settle in, the door creaked open. Katara stepped through it quietly, holding a pale of water. 

Zuko let out a relieved sigh when he saw Katara. He let his body drop back onto the mattress.

“Oh, good, you’re awake!” Katara chirped.

She placed the water by the foot of the bed and moved to sit next to Zuko. Her hand came to slowly brush some hair out of his face. Zuko let his fingers lightly trail up and down her arm. He smiled fondly at her. Her skin seemed brighter, and her eyes weren’t as sunken in. She looked tired still, but better rested than… yesterday? Zuko still wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep.

“You seem better,” Zuko murmured.

“Yeah, well, I actually slept well last night. How long have you been up?”

“Five minutes, maybe? What about you? Where were you?”

“Two hours, or so. I had to grab more water,” Katara said. Zuko hummed. He sat halfway up to meet Katara, who was leaning down to kiss him. Her lips moved slowly across his. The kiss was languid and soft. Every kiss with Katara felt new somehow. He was still discovering all the ways there were to be kissed by her. This kind, the kind that wasn’t pushy, or expectant, had to be one of Zuko’s favorites.

“So,” Katara sighed, pulling off of Zuko’s lips. Zuko whined, earning a laugh from Katara. “Do you notice anything different?” Katara trailed her finger down Zuko’s bare chest towards his abdomen. 

“Different how— _Shit!”_ Zuko looked to where Katara’s fingers had stopped trailing and started tracing a circle. There was no bandage. His ribs no longer ached. “Katara, did you heal me?”

Katara giggled. “Yeah. I got restless watching your face scrunch up in your sleep every time you took a deep breath, so I thought I’d give it a try.”

“Why would you do that?” Zuko raised his voice. He wasn’t exactly yelling, but he was frustrated. He wasn’t the one who needed help. His bones would’ve healed eventually.

“I think the correct response is “thank you,”” Katara chided. She pushed herself off of Zuko. She crossed her arms and looked away from him.

“Hey,” Zuko said, sitting up so he could wrap his arms around her. “Thank you,” He whispered, kissing her shoulder. “Really, _thank you_ , but you shouldn’t have.” Katara didn’t budge. Zuko kissed up her shoulder until he got to her neck. He moved her hair out of the way. He sucked there, and when that didn’t garner a reaction, he began to tickle her. She squeaked and squealed and turned to wrap her arms around Zuko’s neck. He fell back onto the bed with her on his chest.

“Actually, I did have to. Your ribs would have taken at least three months to heal with breaks that bad, and I didn’t want to send you back to the Fire Nation broken." _Back to the Fire Nation._ Zuko didn't like the thought of being sent anywhere without Katara. "You need to be careful with your head, though. There isn’t much I could do for it.”

“You’re so stupid,” Zuko said lovingly, cupping Katara’s face in his hands. He kissed the bridge of her nose. “Everyone is going to be so mad when they find out you helped me. You need your strength.”

“They can be mad all they want. I’m an adult. I wouldn’t have helped you if I thought I couldn’t handle it. I’m sick of everyone treating me like I’m fragile,” Katara huffed. Katara’s head was on his chest, and her body snuggled into his side. Zuko rubbed her arms softly.

“I don’t think anyone thinks you’re fragile, Katara. They’re just worried because they care about you.” Katara hummed in response. “You’re always taking care of everyone. They—we—are just trying to return the favor,” Zuko said. His legs intertwined with hers under the massive blankets.

“We’re arriving today,” Katara whispered, changing the subject. Reality crashed onto Zuko like an Omashu mailcart. This bed wasn't his, and neither was this ship. Zuko's ship had been destroyed or at least badly damaged. Panuk and his merry men were still somewhere on this ship.

“Are you nervous to talk to The Council?”

“No, not really. I just want to get it over with." Zuko knew that wasn't the truth. Katara chewed on her cheeks, something Zuko had only noticed her do when she was nervous. He felt it best not to pry. He had a tendency to make people's worries worse. "Are you?” 

“Do I have to speak to them?” Stupid question, really. He was the Fire Lord, of course, he'd have to speak with them about the assassination attempt on him. 

“In light of what happened with Panuk, I imagine we’ll all have to talk with them.”

_Great._

* * *

Zuko was overwhelmed by how cold it was in the North Pole, even during the summer. He didn’t remember it being so bitter when he came here as a teenager. The city was more dazzling than he remembered, too. The colossal blocks of ice that mounted on one another to create the vast scape of buildings glistened in the summer sun that burned orange and low in the sky at all hours of the day. The chilled wind bit through his hair, and he shivered as soon as he came on deck. Aang and Toph seemed cold, too, but Katara didn’t even flinch.

She leaned on Zuko’s shoulder for support. She was better than yesterday, but she still wasn’t 100%. As she nuzzled into his shoulder, Zuko was struck with the overwhelming sense of peace. Within just two weeks, he’d been more vulnerable with Katara than he’d been with anyone ever. It felt good to get things off his chest, but he wondered if his glaring issues burdened her. Mai always told him he was an inattentive boyfriend, that his problems overshadowed hers, and that he was detached from reality. To be fair, she was absolutely right. At sixteen, with the literal weight of the world on his shoulders, Zuko had been terrible at balancing Mai and his new duties.

He hoped Katara didn’t feel that way with him, but somehow he knew things were different with her. Katara had always been it for him. Even when he was in love with Mai, part of him wanted her to be Katara, and he knew that was messed up. That was part of the reason he’d be such a bad boyfriend: his heart belonged somewhere else. Now, as they skidded towards their impending doom, and gulls cried overheard, Zuko knew that whatever the outcome of the hearing, he’d find a way back to Katara. He hoped she'd find her way back to him, too.

Footsteps approached the group. Sokka and Suki walked towards them, but something was off. Sokka looked stern. Zuko knew they had all grown up, but Sokka usually kept his silly, youthful spirit. There was no trace of it in the hard lines that shaped his face now. Suki, too, looked weathered. He offered both of them a smile that only Suki returned.

“How are you feeling, Katara?” Sokka asked, not even looking at Zuko.

“Fine,” She replied, squeezing Zuko’s arm tighter as if she needed to remind herself that he was there. Sokka nodded before turning to face the quickly approaching ice city. 

“And you, Zuko? How are your ribs?” Suki asked. Zuko looked to Katara, as if asking if he should tell Suki, and subsequently the group, that his ribs were healed, or if he should keep that information to himself. Katara spoke for him.

“They’re fine now. I fixed Zuko up this morning.”

Suki opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by Sokka. “You what?” He screamed. “Are you an idiot, Katara?”

“Woah, hey,” Zuko said, placing his hand on Sokka’s chest, who had barreled towards Katara as he yelled. Sokka wouldn’t hurt her, that Zuko knew, but he didn’t like the way Sokka advanced, or the way Katara flinched behind Zuko’s arm. Sokka wasn't known for outbursts of actual anger, and the sharp downturn of his brows worried Zuko a little. 

“No, you shut up!” Sokka yelled into Zuko’s face. “Haven’t you already done enough?”

“Sokka! That’s not fair,” Katara quipped sternly, stepping in between Zuko and Sokka. Zuko felt a warm sensation spread from his chest. 

“Whatever, Katara. You’re going straight to Yugoda’s as soon as we get off this damn boat and Zuko… Well, you just better hope that Yugoda can help her!” Zuko was confused. _What did I do?_

“I don’t need to go to Yugoda’s! I’m fine,” Katara said, rolling her eyes.

“You lost your right to that decision when you decided to become reckless with your strength,” Sokka said. Katara stepped forward, ready to fight Sokka tooth and nail, but Zuko grabbed her shoulder.

“He’s right, Katara.”

“Excuse me?” Katara asked. Her eyes narrowed in on Zuko, and _oh, fuck, am I in trouble._

Zuko sighed, “You should go to Yugoda’s, just to be sure you’re alright. It won’t be the worst thing to go, right?” Sokka scoffed at Zuko, causing both him and Katara to roll their eyes.

“What about the meeting with the Tribal Council?” Katara asked.

“I’m sure they can wait one more day until you have all your strength,” Zuko said. Katara looked upset, but she nodded anyway, sliding under the crook of Zuko’s arm for comfort. Despite the death glare he got from Sokka, Zuko welcomed her hug and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

“Can everyone promise me one thing?” Katara asked, not moving her face, which was flush against Zuko’s warm chest.

“Anything, Katara,” Aang said.

“Please don’t tell the Tribal Council about Zuko and I before I do. They need to hear it from me.”

The group agreed, mostly. Sokka just grunted. Suki tentatively placed her hand on his shoulder, which he accepted, but it seemed stiffer than usual. 

\--

After they disembarked from the boat, Suki agreed to take Katara to Yugoda’s. Men from the Northern Water Tribes military boarded the ship to take Panuk and the others to a holding cell for the time being while the Tribal Council heard accounts of the attack. Zuko was glad Katara was already on her way to be Yugoda’s. She didn't have to see Panuk’s deranged face as he spat in the group's direction and yelled profanities at them. Sokka’s jaw hardened as Panuk passed.

“How could you let her heal you?” Sokka asked Zuko as they walked towards the meeting place of the Tribal Council.

Tensions were high in the group. Sokka barely looked at Suki as she left, making Zuko wonder what could have possibly happened between them. In the seven years he had known them, he never once saw them fight, or even bicker beyond light teasing. Sokka was also frustrated with his sister, but that seemed somewhat typical for Sokka and Katara’s relationship. Although Sokka and Katara had grown even closer in recent years, they still bickered, especially towards the end of long vacations.

Sokka’s anger accumulated on Zuko, and Zuko assumed it had to be more about Yue and Panuk, and less about Katara. The only two people that seemed free from Sokka’s wrath were Toph and Aang, but even they were receiving a silent treatment. Zuko snuck a glance back at the duo, and he smiled. Toph clung to Aang’s arm as Aang guided her across the ice and described the scenery to her. _Oh, to be young and uninvolved in all this bullshit,_ Zuko thought. Zuko always admired Aang and Toph’s ability to not get involved in other people’s problems. Sokka shoved his shoulder into Zuko’s, attempting to get his attention. Right, Sokka had asked him a question.

“I didn’t _let_ her do anything, Sokka. First of all, Katara is fully capable of making her own decisions. Second, I was asleep when she healed me. Had I been awake, I would have protested. You know damn well that Katara’s safety and wellbeing mean everything to me,” Zuko said. Honestly, he was annoyed with Sokka’s attitude. Zuko knew he wasn’t innocent in any way, but Sokka was being a real prick, and Zuko didn’t understand why.

“Yeah, well, you have a funny way of showing it.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Zuko asked.

And as Sokka opened his mouth to rebut, the colossal frosted doors of the Tribal Council hall opened to reveal an implacable, but familiar face. Sokka’s hard lines softened at the woman approached, and a genuine smile broke across his face.

“Gran-Gran!” Sokka called, running into the old woman’s arms. She smiled to wrap her arms around Sokka for a brief moment. _Gran-Gran._ That’s why she looked familiar. As Toph and Aang both went to greet Kanna, Zuko stood frozen. Technically he’d met her twice, but only once formally, and she hadn’t been a huge fan. It was understandable, given the context of their first meeting. Now that he was dating her granddaughter, he’d like to make a good impression.

 _Why Kanna? Why not Hakoda, or Bato? They both like me,_ Zuko thought as he peered into the sky, looking for some sort of cosmic guidance. Zuko bowed formally to Kanna, who returned the bow diplomatically.

“Fire Lord Zuko, welcome back to the North Pole,” Kanna said, and Zuko winced. If she’d meant that as a jab, it hadn’t come out that way, but it felt personal nonetheless.

“Thank you, Kanna. It’s lovely to remake your acquaintance.” Zuko could practically feel Toph trying not to snicker at his formality. He knew she’d be teasing him for that later. Kanna looked at him with a face he couldn’t read. He braced himself for anger.

“I think it’s high time you start calling ‘Gran Gran.’ Spirits know everyone else does,” Kanna said with a small smile. _Does she know?_ Sokka’s brows flattened again as he glared at Zuko.

Kanna led them down the blue halls of the building, as Sokka chittered away, to a waiting room, lined by ice, with warm pelts across stiff couches. 

"Wait here, the Council will call you in shortly," Kanna said, giving Sokka one last squeeze and stepping out of the room.

One by one, the group was called before the Tribal Council to give their account of Panuk’s attack, starting with Sokka. Zuko twisted his hands nervously as he waited to be called.

“Zuko, can you relax? Your heartbeat is so loud, I can't concentrate!” Toph sighed, letting her head fall into Zuko’s lap as she picked at her toes.

“No, I can’t,” Zuko replied restlessly.

“What are you so nervous about?” Aang asked.

“I don’t know. What if the Tribal Council doesn't believe us? Or worse, what if they were the ones who sent Panuk to attack?”

“Dude, you think they’re not going to believe Sokka, a future chief, and Aang, the Avatar? And did you forget you’re the Fire Lord? Panuk doesn’t stand a chance!” Toph teased.

“I don’t think being the Fire Lord is going to do me any favors here,” Zuko laughed dryly.

“It’s going to be fine, Zuko, trust me,” Aang said, patting Zuko’s shoulder.

“I hope you’re right.”

“I’m always right,” Aang quipped, and Toph snorted. Zuko laughed, too. The door opened, and Sokka reentered the waiting room. Aang was called next, leaving Zuko to face Sokka.

“How’d it go?” Toph asked.

“Fine. Panuk will get what he deserves.” Sokka’s voice was short.

“Really?” Zuko asked, hopefully. Sokka sighed.

“The Tribal Council doesn’t want a war, and they're furious about Panuk’s actions. Honestly, I think they’re more worried about what you’re going to do to them.”

“Me?” Zuko asked in disbelief.

“Well, a high ranking member of the Northern Water Tribe did just stage an attack on your life. They’re afraid you’ll retaliate, or want revenge.”

“Is that what they think of me?”

“Can you blame them?” Sokka put his head in his hands. Zuko winced “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean, it would make sense for you to be angry with the Water Tribes, especially because they don’t know you as we do.”

“Sokka, is everything okay?” Zuko asked, tentatively putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“No, everything is not okay!” Sokka cried. “But it’s not your fault.” Zuko softened. Sokka's eyes were watery as he looked helplessly at Zuko. Sokka continued, “I’m sorry I’ve been taking my anger out on you.”

“It’s alright, Sokka. Grieving takes many forms. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry for what happened to Yue. Even back then, I wouldn’t have wanted that for her, or anyone.”

“Please, excuse me,” Sokka said, standing abruptly. His eyes were misty, and before Zuko could say anything more, Sokka was out the door, leaving Zuko to wonder if he had said the wrong thing. 

“What was that all about?” Toph asked.

“It’s a long story, Toph. One I don’t have the energy for right now.”

“Okay, fine, don’t tell me,” Toph sighed. Zuko groaned. “Relax, Sparky. Geez, are you this serious in the sack, too? Man, I feel for Katara.”

“Shut up, Toph,” Zuko said lightheartedly, tossing her onto the floor. Toph howled and cackled as her body hit the frosty ice.

The doors opened again. Aang stepped out, smiling softly at the councilman that escorted him out of the room. Aang stood tall and proud, a fully realized Avatar indeed. Aang caught Zuko’s eyes and nodded at him comfortingly as if to tell him he’d be fine.

“Fire Lord Zuko, please come with me,” the councilman said.

Zuko inhaled deeply, centering himself and his nerves. The Tribal Council Court was massive. The council members sat in gigantic steps of ice, which toward above the small stand Zuko was brought to stand upon. Zuko looked up at the Tribal Council, most of which he had met with before, but he only recognized a few faces: Chief Arnook, Pakku, and Bato. Bato nodded at him with a small smile. 

“Fire Lord Zuko, the Tribal Council, and I welcome you,” Chief Arnook stood, respectfully, as he spoke.

Zuko bowed. “Chief Arnook. Council,” Zuko greeted.

“How is your crew?” Arnook asked more informally.

“Fine, thank you. Only a few minor injuries and they’re all being escorted to Yugoda and her healers for treatment.”

“And you? Any injuries?”

“A few broken ribs, nothing Katara couldn’t fix,” Zuko said, patting his recently healed libs. The formality slipped from his voice as he talked about Katara. For a moment, he panicked, wondering if anyone on the Council at realized.

“We’re glad to hear it. Fire Lord Zuko, before we begin, we want to let you know that we are deeply sorry for what happened. We do not condone Panuk’s actions. We hope that you know that he and his extremist group do not reflect the sentiment of this council, or the individual tribes. We plan to bring Panuk to justice for his attack.”

A weight was lifted off of Zuko’s shoulder. “Thank you, Chief Arnook.”

“On the subject of justice, there is the conversation of _how_ Panuk shall be brought to justice. We can promise you that we’re not taking this issue lightly. If Panuk is tried here, by the Tribal Council, we’ll take the utmost severity. However, according to the United Peoples Peace Accords Section 7, Paragraph 3:

_Any attempt on a leader’s life shall be dealt with internally. However, if the threat comes from an outside nation, the leaders of each respective Nation will have three options._

_A. Allow the accused to stand trial in their home nation, with no influence from the court of the attacked._

_B. Allow the accused to stand trial in the nation of the attacked, with no influence from the court of the accused._

_C. Allow the accused to stand trial in both nations, with the governing body of A.P.P.A. overseeing both trials_

_It is up to the nations of both the attacked and the accused to come to a peaceful decision for how to settle an assassination attempt._ _If a decision cannot be reached, A.P.P.A. has the right, and duty, to conduct the trial externally._

How would you like to proceed, Fire Lord Zuko?” Chief Arnook asked.

Zuko good sense the nerves in the room. Zuko hadn't been expecting such a diplomatic response to the problem. Zuko wondered briefly if the Tribal Council would betray his trust and allow Panuk to walk free, but the words felt sincere, and Zuko couldn't shake what Sokka had told him about the Council being afraid of him. If Zuko entered this meeting aggressively, how would that impact Katara and their relationship? Zuko took a deep breath. 

“The Joint Water Tribes have been nothing but cooperative with me since I took the throne. This could not have been easy, given the actions of my father and those who worked under him. You’ve helped me forge peace between our two nations. While I think most of your acceptance was thanks to my connections with Sokka, Katara, and the Avatar, your support helped immensely. I trust the judgment of this council. I believe that you’ll find that appropriate punishment for Prince Panuk. One that not only holds him accountable but also gets him the psychological help he needs. I fear that the judges of the Fire Nation would not be so kind to him. I’d also rather not get A.P.P.A. to involve if they are not needed.”

“Thank you, Fire Lord Zuko. The Water Tribes will not forget what you’ve done here today. You’ve saved our people embarrassment and retaliation. If there is anything we can do to show our gratitude, please let us know.”

“I suppose it’s rather petty, but my ship was badly damaged…”

“It will be taken care of, of course. Anything else?" Zuko so desperately wanted to beg for their acceptance, but he shook his head. "Next order of business, your statement.”

Zuko’s hearing was short, and after he was done giving his official statement, he was escorted back out to the waiting room. By the time Toph finished giving her statement, dinner was in order. Dinner was fantastic or would have been if Zuko could stop worrying about Katara. Her health was less of a concern than her looming meeting with the Tribal Council. The fact that one meeting could determine the future of their relationship made Zuko’s head spin. To make matters worse, he couldn’t even talk to her about it.

As he laid awake in a large, cozy bed, in the diplomat housing, he wished he had Katara in his arms. Her fingers would comb through his hair, and her lips would press into his forehead. He’d squeeze her into his side, as if he let go, she’d disappear. Zuko tossed and turned that night with the suffocating realization that he’d never get a good night's sleep again if Katara wasn’t next to him.


	22. Heaven Help A Fool Who Falls In Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope a long chapter makes up for this being late!!! I'm so busy rn, but I should have some more free time this week so yay!

The sound of ice crunching under boots brought Katara a familiar sense of calm, even as the chaos of the situation surrounded her. Suki’s arm wrapped around her waist to support her as they walked to Yugoda’s. She had held up a front in front of Zuko and her brother, but Katara felt weak again. The walk was silent, painfully so. Men and Women from Zuko’s crew walked in tandem with Katara and Suki. Barely audible above the sounds of footsteps, Katara heard Suki sniffle. 

“You alright?” Katara asked.

“Fine, Katara. Let’s focus on getting you better right now,” Suki said, but the words came out broken.

“Oh, Suki. What’s going on? It’s Sokka, isn’t it?” 

“Yes, and no,” Suki whimpered. Katara stopped to wrap her arms around Suki. “It’s Yue.”

“Yue?” Katara asked, stoking Suki’s hair. 

“He still loves her, and that’s fine; I’d never ask him not to, but he won’t talk to me about it. The only reason I know about her is because of the Ember Island Players and then from what I’ve picked up in overheard conversations. I can tell he’s hurting, but he won’t let me in, and I don’t know why,” Suki choked out. Katara didn’t know what to say. How could she explain grief and guilt she didn't carry?

“Sokka rarely talks about her with me either. I think it’s too hard of a memory for him, but Suki, you should know he loves you more than anything in the world, and his feelings for Yue don’t diminish his feelings for you.”

“I know that, but I don’t think he does. I tried to talk to him about it on the boat, but he wouldn’t let me. He got so angry that I dropped the subject,” Suki sighed. Katara squeezed Suki’s shoulder to comfort her. 

“Give him time, Suki. I think Panuk, and being here, brings up bad memories for him. He’ll come around, I promise.”

“I hope you’re right, Katara.” Katara hoped she was too. 

* * *

Katara sat on a small cot in Yugoda’s healing center. A small waterfall pooled water in a trough by her feet. Katara reached her fingers out to run them under the babbling water. As the chilled water made contact with her skin, she felt the healing properties rush through the veins of her fingers and hands, energizing her slightly. 

“You ought to be careful with that, Master Katara,” Yugoda warned, entering the hut. Katara jumped a little, yanking her fingers out of the water. 

“Yugoda!” Katara cooed, welcoming the woman into her arms for a warm hug.

“It’s great to see you again, Katara.”

“You as well! Though, I wish it were due to happier circumstances,” Katara admitted. 

“Yes, I heard of the attack, and your bravery.”

“I don’t know if what I did was bravery or cowardice.”

“It was bravery, Katara. We’re all so proud of you.”

“For attacking members of the Northern Water Tribe and the future chief?”

“Well, truthfully, Panuk isn't all that popular, Katara. Especially not with those of us who remember the 100 Year War vividly. He's an extremist who wanted another revolution, but most of us are tired. We’re enjoying this time of peace,” Yugoda said, preparing the water to heal Katara. 

“I thought… Panuk made it seem like he was the Spirit’s gift to the Northern Water Tribe.”

“Of course, he did," Yugoda scoffed. "Panuk had a bit of a superiority complex. He did a lot for us after Yue died. He stepped in when Chief Arnook was absent with grief, but he was also arrogant and power-hungry. He held sentiments and ideas that the majority of us didn’t, but he had charmed Chief Arnook and was able to get away with a lot. This isn't the first attack or coup he's tried to stage. I’d be glad to see him locked up.

“You don’t mean that. Who will lead the Northern Tribe?”

“There are plenty of young men and women who would love to take his place, don’t you worry about that. Let’s focus on getting you better.” Yugoda brought the water up to Katara’s chest and started to massage it into her chest. Katara closed her eyes as the cold water pushed through her chest. It hurt, but it felt good. She could feel herself getting stronger by the second. Yugoda grunted, bending the water further over Katara’s body. “Your energy field is weak. What else happened besides blood bending?” Yugoda asked. Katara winced at the mention of blood bending.

“I… Zuko’s had a few broken ribs, so I healed them,” Katara admitted, looking down at her hands.

“Katara, you know that good healing requires a healthy mind and body of the healer. You weren’t strong enough for that. I could’ve easily fixed his ribs in no time. Why would you put yourself at risk like that?” Katara was quiet. Tears slipped from her eyes. “You love him,” Yugoda gasped. 

“I do,” Katara admitted helplessly. She'd known for some time that she loved him, but she never admitted it to herself. She'd only just told Zuko, but it still felt like a secret. Saying it to Yugoda made it real. 

“And the Fire Lord doesn't feel the same?” Yugoda misread Katara's tears of fear and confusion for tears that mourned unrequited love. 

“No, He does, but that makes it worse!” Katara cried. 

Katara had been holding herself together for so long, telling herself that obstacles could be mounted, and they'd weather the storms their relationship would surely bring. She had been telling herself that even if she only got to have him as a lover for a brief moment, and life got in the way, or they were unmeant to be, it'd be enough to have had him. Then she thought she had lost Zuko, in the morbid, permanent way, and the stakes rose. She feared that Panuk wouldn't be the last person to try and take Zuko from her, and she feared the council might actually bar her from seeing him. The sinking feeling she'd tried to ignore set in: Maybe Panuk was right. Can feelings alone ever be enough? 

“I love him so much, but what if we aren’t meant to be? I just keep getting this sickening feeling that the universe is against us.”

“By the universe, do you mean Tribal Council?” Yugoda asked. Katara didn’t respond. Yugoda sighed and sat down on the cot next to Katara. “You love him, right?” Katara nodded. “And he loves you?” Katara nodded again. “Then you’ll make it work. Love is the strongest force in this universe; it has a way of overcoming all obstacles if it’s true.”

“He’s Fire; I’m Water. We’re elemental opposites. How can we make that work?”

“I’ve never liked the idea that Fire and Water are opposites, have you? I rather like to see them as two sides of the same coin. Just as water brings healing and life, fire breeds warmth and light. Fire is destructive, true, but floods can do just as much damage. Both fire and water are unyielding and difficult to control, in their most natural states. I don’t think they’re opposite at all. We need both of them to survive, and they need each other to create balance. At the risk of sounding cliché, opposites do attract, Katara.”

“But I’m from the Water Tribe, and he _is_ the Fire Nation. Won’t everyone hate me if I abandon our people for the Fire Nation?” Katara fiddled with her fingernails nervously. She wasn’t scared of loving Zuko, or being with him, or even telling the Tribal Council to fuck off, but the thought of losing who she was for him terrified her, but how could she tell him that? He’d be distraught, and she’d already seen him cry enough for an entire lifetime. 

“Katara, you will always be a member of the Southern Water Tribe. Your father will always be Hakoda, your brother, Sokka. You will always be a water bender. With you, you will always carry our customs, traditions, and beliefs. You didn’t become less Water Tribe when you went off with The Avatar, or when you bought a home in Ba Sing Se, or when you pretended to be from the Fire Nation for cover, did you? You don’t become the person you date or marry. You are not a title or property; you’re a person, and who and what that person becomes is up to you, but she’ll always be Water Tribe.” 

Yugoda’s hand squeezed Katara’s, and for the first time in nearly two days, Katara was able to breathe deeply. 

“So you think Zuko and I can make it?” 

“We’ve entered a new age, one where tyranny doesn’t divide the nations of the world. You may be from different places, but we’re all one people. I think a high profile couple like the two of you would give those struggling to rebuild and forgive something to look up to.”

Katara smiled. “Thank you, Yugoda.” Katara threw her arms around Yugoda. 

“Can I continuing fixing you now?” Yugoda asked. Katara’s laugh came out like a sniffle, but she nodded. “Stupid Girl, risking your health for a boy,” Yugoda muttered, but she was smiling. 

“A cute boy, though,” Katara rationalized, knowing that Yugoda wasn’t mad at her. 

“A cute boy, indeed,” Yugoda agreed. 

Yugoda kept Katara in her healing center overnight to make sure she was okay. Katara tossed and turned all night. Physically, she felt great. Mentally, too, she was sharp as a tack, but something wasn’t right. Despite being in a comfy bed surrounded by smells and sounds that reminded her of home, sleep didn’t find her. She missed being able to roll into warm, strong arms and find the scent of cedar and fresh soap, which masked the distant smokiness. Katara wanted to know how the meeting with the tribal council went, but more importantly, she wanted Zuko’s comforting kiss.

Katara’s hearing was at 10 AM; she rose at 6 AM. She paced in her room for nearly two hours, trying to gather her thoughts. _What is the tribal Council going to say to me? What did they say to the others? How did Zuko and the Council work out Panuk's trial?_ By 9 AM, she knew what she needed to do.

Part of Katara wanted to roll over and show her belly. To grovel in forgiveness and ask for the Tribal Council’s blessing of her and Zuko’s relationship, and hope the Spirits were on her side. It was the "respectable" option, but it left far too much uncertain for Katara, and it didn’t address what was truly bothering her. There was more to tackle here than her relationship with Zuko. The Tribal Council had ignored her wishes too many times. She wasn't going to let herself be pushed around by this group of men anymore. She needed to be firm and have courage in her convictions. She needed to stand up for herself. 

And that was exactly what she was going to do.

The diplomatic building towered above Katara in all its glittering glory. Today wasn’t the first time she’d stood outside in awe of the possibilities the building represented, but she feared it might be the last. A member of the Northern Guard escorted Suki and Katara to a waiting room that was all too familiar to Katara. Katara had been summoned to the Tribal Council many times as a representative to the Southern Water Tribe. It always made her somewhat nervous. This time, though, she knew there was nothing they could say to her that would change her mind, and she was going to give them a piece of it. 

As Katara made her way into the domed hall of the court, she only wished she could see Zuko’s face one more time before she entered to calm her nerves. A memory would have to do. The outline of his smile had tattooed itself on her brain years ago, back when it was a rare sight. She kept it tucked away for moments like these when she needed the golden ray of light it procured in her brain. 

“Master Katara,” Chief Arnook greeted. 

Katara took her place in the center of the room. “Council,” Katara greeted coldly. She wasn’t here to play nice. 

“We understand that Yugoda healed you up?” Chief Arnook asked. 

“Yep, all better,” Katara grimaced. 

“Good, good,” Chief Arnook clucked, scratching his once-brown beard that had grayed over the years from time and grief. “Well, there is no use in evading the situation at hand. I trust you know we originally summoned you to hear to discuss your relationship, or lack thereof, with Prince Panuk.” Katara nodded; her blood boiled. “Clearly, the situation has… shifted, shall we say.”

“Clearly,” Katara gritted through clenched teeth. She rolled her fingers up into her palms, digging crescent moons into the calloused skin until she was sure she was bleeding. Katara attempted to control her breathing as her temper reached a breaking point. There was no use in exploding on them, yet.

“Right, well, considering his attack on your group, we aren't sure that Panuk is the most reliable narrator. We’d like your take on the situation.” 

Katara had a reason to explode. 

“My take?” Katara squabbled. “Sure, I’ll tell you my _take._ This conclave of men has done nothing but ignore my wishes for seven whole years. Normal Southern Water Tribe Girls get walruseal mittens and hair beads for their 15 birthday, and what did I get? An unsolicited directory of suitors. I wasn’t even of marrying age, and yet you all decided that it was in my best interest to be married the second I turned 16! Do you want to know what _my best interest_ was? To be a kid, but that just wasn’t on the table, so I stepped up and became an ambassador because I love my people. And how did you all repay me? By sending a lunatic of a suitor who attempted to kill me, and my friends, during our vacation!”

“Katara—“

“I’m not finished!” Katara interrupted. “You are beyond lucky that we were able to quell Panuk. What would’ve happened if we died? Obviously, you see me as indispensable, but what if it had been Aang? Or Sokka? Who would lead the Southern Tribe then? And what if something had happened to Zuko beyond a few broken ribs? You’d be at war with the Fire Nation, a war we’d most certainly lose, and it’d all be because you didn’t think I was good enough on my own.”

“Now, Katara that’s not fair,” A councilman Katara barely recognized spoke.” The reason we attempted to find you a suitable husband was not because we didn’t think you were strong enough on your own. We know full well your capabilities. We did it because you’re one of the best women our tribe has to offer, and we thought you’d value a strong match after The Avatar.”

“Excuse my undiplomatic language, Councilman, but that's bullshit, and we both know it. You did it because you fear what you don’t know. You knew that I frequent other nations, and you were afraid that if I fell in love with someone outside of the Joint Water Tribes—“

“—Katara!—”

“—that you’d lose my skills, my leadership, and your leverage over other nations. You were right about me finding affection outside of our nation. It’s happened more than once, but it’s never led me to love our people any less. If anything, it’s made me love them more. I’ve realized that who I marry, Water Tribe, or not, doesn’t determine which nation I belong to because I’m not property. I just wish you could see that, too.”

“Katara!” Chief Arnook desperately called for Katara's attention again. 

Katara continued despite the interruption, “I love the Water Tribe with every inch of my being, but I can’t in good conscious continue working under a council who’d ask me to quit my job if I didn’t marry who they chose." Katara took a deep breath. Her hands shook. Knowing what she needed to do did not make the words reach the tip of her tongue any easier. "I’m resigning from—"

“Katara, please, slow down, and hear us out,” Chief Arnook said. “We were wrong, Katara. You were right; we forced you into a box for our benefit, and it almost got you and other important people killed. Our job is to serve, advise, and protect the members of the Joint Water Tribes, and we failed you on all accounts. We are so sorry.”

Katara hadn't been expecting that. Everything she had come prepared to fight for seemed obsolete. For a fleeting moment, Katara thought that she'd be able to keep the position she loved, but reality, an everpresent nuisance, encased her. She needed to tell them about the nature of her relationship with Zuko, and that almost certainly meant having to step down. 

“Thank you, but I still don't think I can continue serving as an ambassador because—“

“—because of your relationship with Fire Lord Zuko,” Chief Arnook interrupted and finished. 

“What?” Katara squeaked. 

“Prince Panuk told us of you and the Fire Lord, but most of us didn’t believe it. It’s true, isn’t it?” Bato asked from the seat where her father would usually sit. 

Katara had been too caught up in her ferocity that she didn't think to look for her father's warm, comforting eyes, which always seemed to apologize for the actions of his fellow council members. Hakoda was probably the only person in her corner during council meetings, and she loved him for that. He was likely the reason the Tribal Council had not forced her into something horrific. Hakoda was heavy into the rebuilding of the Southern Water Tribe and, likely, couldn't be pulled away on such short notice. She missed him. She wished he had been here, but Bato was just as comforting to see. 

"Katara? Is it true?" Bato asked again. 

“I… yes,” Katara confessed. She brought her gaze down to her fingers that twiddled and picked at one another. She waited for the berating to begin, but the anger never came. She sighed. When she looked up, they were waiting for her to explain further. “And..." Katara hesitated. "And frankly, I don’t care what you all think about Zuko and I. Had I not felt a duty to this council, Zuko and I might have gotten together years ago. I’ve spent far too long ignoring my feelings to appease the Water Tribe, but I can’t do that anymore.”

The men were silent, perhaps for too long. Katara’s breath froze in her chest as she waited for Arnook to speak again. 

“We understand.”

“Wait, you what?” Katara gasped. 

“We understand. We’ve discussed your relationship with the Fire Lord at great length. We’ve come to realize that an alliance between you and the Fire Lord might be exactly what that Joint Water Tribes need.”

“So you’re attempting to politicize my relationship?" Katara's anger which had been subdued by the sudden hope that they had understood. "Unbelievable,” Katara muttered. 

“Not necessarily, but, Katara, you don’t realize how much power you hold as an ambassador, ally to The Avatar, and sister to the new Southern Water Tribe Chief. The junction of you and Zuko would be advantageous to both the Water Tribes and the Fire Nation, and it wouldn't be an arranged marriage. You do love him, don't you? Isn't this what you've always wanted?” Somewhere deep inside, Katara knew Chief Arnook was right. “It doesn't need to be right away, and we'd love to have you for as long as possible, but eventually, you're right: you'll need to step down. You pose a conflict of interest being an ambassador and the Fire Lady.”

“I’m sorry, the what?”

“The Fire Lady. We assume you and the Fire Lord intend to marry?”

“Oh, right,” Katara murmured. ”We, um, haven’t quite discussed that.” They had once, but the conversation had been hypotheticals and far off notions. In this context, the discussion of marriage was serious, and the furthest thing from a romanticized daydream. “I suppose one day.” 

She assumed the Tribal Council kept talking about rituals and expectations, but her brain went fuzzy. _Fire Lady?_ She’d barely started dating Zuko, and now they wanted to make her Fire Lady? How had she not considered the fact that she'd become nothing more than a figurehead after marriage? Zuko didn't want that, _right?_ He liked her because she was someone strong and brave on her own. Katara thought back to every conversation she had ever had with Zuko, and she suddenly knew that he wasn't expecting her to be the Fire Lady, just his wife.

 _Spirits, Zuko's wife._ Katara quite liked the sound of that. _Fire Lady Katara._ She wasn’t a fire lady at all, so why did the title make her stand a little taller? The thought of wearing the constrictive burgundy robes didn't excite her, nor did the prospect of meetings to discuss china patterns and place settings, but the idea of being Zuko's betrothed sent something, not unlike lightning, from her toes to her heart. 

“As Fire Lady, you’ll have many diplomatic duties, and the nations of the world will be looking to you as a symbol of a new beginning. You’ll represent us well, Master Katara,” Zuko tunned back into Chief Arnook's ramblings. 

Titles, responsibilities, diplomacy; those discussions could happen later after she fled this retched building and found the feeling of arms around her waist she had been missing all day.

“I’m sorry, are you encouraging me to marry Fire Lord Zuko?” Katara stuttered out. 

“Well, yes, but we want to be clear that we aren’t forcing you into this. We’ve realized that we failed you by forcing you to do something you didn’t want to do. This is what you want, right?”

“Right…” Katar sighed, still unsure how to process everything. "I mean, yes. I just... you aren't expecting a marriage anytime soon, are you? With the building summit in Republic City in a few weeks and the Kyoshi banquet at the end of the year, I'm not quite ready to give up my position. There is so much I still want to do." 

“There are many Water Tribe formalities that need to be followed once you’re engaged, not to mention Fire Nation traditions, but we can cross those bridges when we get there,” Arnook said calmly, and with a smile, she didn't think the Northern Water Tribe had seen since Yue passed. 

Katara nodded meekly. She’d come in with as much gusto as an Elephant Seal in heat and left like a Polar Bear Dog with its tail between its legs. Somehow though, she got what she wanted. The _how_ was still materializing in her brain, but that was okay because she would be able to call Zuko "boyfriend" without fear. 

"Thank you, Chief Arnook."

“This is awkward, but we still need your statement of the attack for the trial record.” For a moment, Katara had forgotten about Panuk. 

"So he's being tried in the Water Tribe then?" Katara asked.

"Yes, Fire Lord Zuko was very adamant about that," Chief Arnook stated. Katara fought the urge to roll her eyes at how level-headed and diplomatic Zuko pretended to be when she knew he'd love nothing more than to set Panuk ablaze on a boat that floated out to sea. 

_What a sight that would be,_ Katara thought. As she started to give her account of the attack, a sly smile danced across her face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, so I was just excited to get 1000 hits on this, but I'm nearing 8000 and i'm all ??? thank you all so much for your support!


	23. Moonlit Conversations During The Early Afternoon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer-ish: I would absolutely die for both Yue and Suki. That's it. That's the disclaimer.

Katara stepped out of the Tribal Court, dazed and confused. _Had that just happened?_ Her fingers were numb, and the mounds of her palms ached from the marks she’d dug into her skin that had drawn blood. Katara slipped mittens over her hands as she exited the court. She'd heal herself later. The only thing on her mind was finding Zuko. 

“Well?” A familiar low and raspy voice called from the waiting room. _Zuko._ Katara looked up to see her friends nervously waiting for her. They all stood cautiously. She’d be lying if she said she seriously noticed anyone in the room beside Zuko. His winter robes, probably the only robes which equipped him for even the summer cold up north, adorned his body in a militant and honorable fashion that made Katara want to do nothing more than to rip them off. 

She rushed towards him and engulfed herself in his arms, feeling his erratic heartbeat rattle against her chest. Although she thought it was impossible, she pulled him closer to her, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. As if an impulse, his arms found their way around her waist, and he spun her around. Her toes skidded against the icy floor until she lifted them back towards her butt in glee.

“What happened?” Zuko asked nervously. She kissed him vehemently, letting her tongue dart between his lips, feeling the warm sensation of his mouth transfer heat into her heart, stomach, and loins. She needed to tell him what the council expected of them, but she became too caught up in the sensation his arms brought. “Katara, I’m getting nervous… what happened? 

“They’re okay with us,” Katara breathed out against the metal shoulder piece of Zuko's formal robes, which frosted her cheek. 

“Really?” 

“Actually, they encouraged it. Arnook said our relationship would bring an era of peace and collaboration between our two nations,” Katara said with an eye roll, which Zuko returned. Her fingers tangled into the long strands of his hair to let her fingers comb through it. 

"So, they want to politicize us?" Zuko asked. 

"Of course they do, but I don't even care right now," Katara sighed, snuggling into Zuko. 

“I told you it’d work out,” Zuko placed a chaste kiss to Katara’s lips.

“ _I_ told _you_ that.”

“Don’t ruin the moment,” Zuko whispered, pulling Katara in for another hug.

“Just another day I’m glad I’m blind, so I don’t have to see the mush,” Toph commented. Katara quickly realized it wasn’t just her and Zuko in the room and had to actively will her hormones to calm down. 

“Shut up, Toph,” Katara said, sticking her tongue out, even though she knew Toph couldn’t see it, or maybe because of it. She realized Aang and Suki were smiling wildly at them, but something was off. She mentally counted the number of people in the room. 

“Where’s Sokka?” Katara asked, realizing her brother’s absence with a frown. Suki’s head ducked, and she began picking at her arms nervously. 

Zuko whispered in her ear, “He ran off yesterday after his meeting. Said he had something to do. We haven't seen him since.” 

_Idiot,_ Katara thought, knowing, immediately, that Sokka was hiding in the spirit oasis. She stared at Suki’s broken face and grimaced. _Idiot,_ Katara thought again. Katara turned her attention back to Zuko. She pressed a small, but firm kiss onto Zuko’s lips, letting him know she was still there before she slipped out of his arms to place two comforting hands-on Suki’s shoulders. 

“I’ll get him, Suki. I know exactly where he is,” Katara said. Suki nodded, unable to meet Katara’s eyes. Suki's shoulders shook as she silently cried. Katara hugged Suki firmly, willing her to believe her. “Aang, take care of her,” Katara whispered to the bald boy, who really wasn’t a boy anymore. Aang nodded with a knowing smile, and Katara felt grateful for her friends. 

* * *

The farther Katara got from the Tribal Council Court, the hazier her mind felt again. _Fire Lady_. It should’ve been obvious that the tribal council would want her to marry Zuko seeing as they had wanted her to do so with every other mediocre suitor, but Katara’s blissful galavants with Zuko had blinded her to that fact. For the first time in her life, the prospect of marriage excited her more than it scared her. Hopefully, Zuko was on the same page.

She could ask him. He had insisted on escorting her wherever she needed to go. Despite putting up a mostly fake, minor fight, insisting that she could find her way alone, Katara was glad to have his arm wrapped into hers. She didn’t miss the surprised look from villagers as they crossed over bridges through the town center. _Get used to it,_ Katara thought as a villager's jaw dropped upon seeing Katara openly welcome Zuko's kiss on her cheek _._ No one seemed upset, only surprised, and that comforted Katara. Zuko looked down at her with a soft smile as they approached the entrance tot he Spirit Oasis.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Do you ever get used to the staring?” Katara could still feel the eyes of impressed, or maybe fearful, Water Tribe members on them. She had lived so much of her life in anonymity. She wasn’t used to glasshouses. 

“No, but you learn to ignore it,” Zuko admitted. 

“So, this is what being the Fire Lady will be like,” Katara mumbled under her breath, or she thought she did. Zuko froze like the ice under their feet. Rigidly, he turned to face Katara, face pale. _Shit._ “I didn’t mean—I mean, I did, but—”

Zuko’s lips were on hers before she could explain. The kiss breathed fire into her lungs and ignited something in her veins. Kissing Zuko was always exceptional and exciting, but this was something else; something electric. People were most likely gawking. How unceremonious of them. She could practically sense the Tribal Council's unanimous stroke from their actions. They'd be appalled. No chaperones, no formalities, just her and Zuko, the way she wanted it. 

“You want that still.” The words from Zuko's mouth should've been a question, but they were firm; he was confirming what he should have already known. Zuko’s eyes swam with hope, and it seemed to Katara that he'd been afraid. 

“I do; one day.”

“I thought, maybe, being here would change your mind. That the surroundings of your culture, and your people, would make you realize that I can’t offer you what you didn't realize you needed,” Zuko said, tucking Katara’s small braids, which fell into her face, behind her ears. 

Katara sighed and almost let herself laugh. She'd been so concerned with her doubts that she hadn't realized that Zuko had similar ones. 

“I love my culture, but not like I love you, and the two aren’t mutually exclusive. I’m just as much Water Tribe here as I am in the Fire Nation. No geographic location or ceremonious title will change that, nor do my feelings for you. The cold's getting tiresome anyway."

Zuko pulled katara against him. He pulled his glove off with his teeth in a way that made Katara feel like a teenager again. _I'm so screwed if I find that sexy._ Zuko lit a tiny flame in his hand, only to extinguish it as quickly as it had grown, and brought his hot palm to Katara's cheek. She leaned into the grooved skin, eyes fluttering closed involuntarily. 

"I can't believe I get to have you," Zuko whispered. "Ah, I mean, not that I think you're my property of anything. I mean, I want you to be my wife when we're ready, but I don't—you're not _mine_ in that I own you, I just—"

Katara interrupted Zuko's nervous rambling with another kiss. "Zuko, I'm yours. Completely and unabashedly so. But..." Katara trailed off, unsure how to continue telling Zuko that being his didn't mean the loss of her autonomy.

"But?"

"But I don't want to lose me to stay yours. When— _if—_ we get married, I don't want to become a figurehead. I want to be able to dress in a way that honors my people without being disrespectful to yours, and I want to be a real leader." 

“Anything,” Zuko whispered into Katara’s hair. “Anything you want, any way you want to be, it’s yours.”

“I don’t think that’s true. Your people are already going to reject me enough. If I show up in a traditional Parka, they might hate me." 

“Well that, and you’d be sweaty,” Zuko joked, earning a half-witted laugh from Katara. “They won’t hate you, Katara. You have no idea how much the members of the Fire Nation adore you.”

“Yeah, right,” Katara scoffed. 

“You stopped Azula. You're the reason the war ended with the Fire Nation still intact, Katara."

"And what about your advisors? I can't imagine they'll take too kindly to some Water Tribe girl coming in to stir things up." 

"If you think I'd give a damn what my advisors have to say about us, you clearly don't know how much you mean to me," Zuko said, squeezing Katara against his body. That _something_ was flaming through her veins again. 

"Zuko," Katara whined.

"I'm serious, Kat. My advisors will warm to you, and so will the Fire Nation citizens who don't already want to build a shrine in your honor. I’ll show you one day.”

“One day,” Katara agreed with a smile, though her anxieties still ate at her slightly. 

"Do you want me to wait for you?" Zuko asked, holding the small door to the Oasis open for Katara. 

"No, that's alright. I honestly don't know how long this will take."

"Hey," Zuko stopped Katara before she ducked inside. Katara stared at him quizzically. "I love you." _Spirits, those words._ Katara knew Zuko felt like he didn't deserve her, but when she stared at him, poised and elegant in his Fire Nation regalia, she was the one who felt unworthy. 

"I love you, too."

* * *

The lush, green grass of the Oasis garden gripped at Katara’s boots. The icy frost of the north pole did not reach her there. A slight sweat formed under her arms and above her brow. Katara was careful to keep quiet so she wouldn't startle her brother, who sat criss-cross at the pond bank. His ordinary confidence had slipped away, and he reminded Katara so much of the boy whose father had left him in symbolic charge of an entire village: fragile and scared. Something was different in his face, this time, though. It was hope.

His fingers lightly traced in a circle above the water of the pond, careful not to touch. Katara saw his jaw move as he spoke to the beautiful white Koi, which circled in the pond under the pads of his finger. She could barely hear him. His words became more audible as she approached, though she could only catch fragments at first. 

“He sucks… then we… I assume you know that about him, though—and Suki she…” Sokka was rambling, typical, but the animation in his voice brought a smile to Katara’s face. Now just yards behind him, his ramblings formed full sentences. “…the most wonderful girl I’ve ever met… pretty, and strong, and brave, not unlike you. I wish you could’ve met. You’d be friends, I think. Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking. No, you’d like her, and she’d adore you.”

Katara sat in the cold grass silently next to her brother, whose eyes stayed focused on the white fish—on _her._ An odd sort of drumming sounded in Katara’s ear that paired with a new, overwhelming urge to hug her brother. How long had he been mourning without anyone noticing? Yue became the moon spirit seven years ago, and Sokka seemed to recover quickly after reuniting with Suki, but grieving isn’t linear. Katara knew that losing someone you cared about wasn't easy. Even if the wound has healed, the smallest moment could rip into your grief and turn it inside out. Yue was the first girl who was truly important to Sokka. He loved her, and part of that love was rooted in missed opportunities, but it was still love.

“Hi, Katara,” Sokka sighed, not taking his attention off of Yue’s spirit. 

“She’d be so proud of you, you know,” Katara offered. Sokka hummed in response. “How often do you come here?”

“Probably too much. Every time I’m here. Sometimes more than once on long trips. I know it’s stupid, but I’m afraid if I don’t come, it’s like I’ve forgotten Yue.”

“That’s not stupid, Sokka. It’s sweet. What is stupid is shutting all of us out because you’re upset. Especially Suki. She thinks you’re mad at her,” Katara sighed. 

“I’m not mad,” Sokka sighed back. “It’s just….” Sokka squeezed his eyes shut. “I’ll always love Yue, and in a messed up way, I think this—me and Suki—it was all meant to work out this way, but I hate myself for that. Does it make me a bad person for thinking that?” 

“No, you’re not a bad person, Sokka. The spirits have a plan for all of us, I think. While we have the power to shape our destiny, some things are out of our control. We can’t always control what happens to us or the decisions that those we care about make. Sometimes, we just have to make do with what we can.”

Katara saw tears spill from Sokka’s eyes. Sokka was in touch with his emotions, but crying was rare for him, and even more rare in front of Katara. After their mother died and their father went off to war, Sokka tried hard to hold it together for Katara to give her some sort of stability. Not that she asked for it, but they both assumed the roles of parents for each other after they were alone. 

“I love Suki so much, but I love Yue, too. How can I be a good husband, much less a good person, if I love them both?” 

“Because you love them differently,” Katara affirmed. Sokka’s shoulders shook ever so slightly as he attempted to hide his sobs. Katara placed a hand on his shoulder. “Oh, Sokka. I don’t think our hearts have a capacity for how much we can love, especially not yours. You loved Yue in this life, and how fortunate you were to be loved back. She may be physically gone, but it’s not wrong for you to still love her. _I know_ she still loves you too, and I’m sure that every full moon that shines is for you.

Your love for Yue doesn’t outweigh your love for Suki, and your engagement to Suki doesn’t defile what you felt for Yue. You have room in your heart for them both, and Suki knows that if you’d just let her in."

"How?" Sokka sniffled. 

"She's going to be your wife, Sokka. Why don't you try talking to her? How much does have you told her about Yue?”

“Some. Not enough, probably, but it's not like Suki doesn't know what happened,” Sokka defended.

"Just because she knows the basics, doesn't mean she knows what happened. Suki knows the historical version, not the version that lets her into your heart. She loves you, Sokka. She isn’t asking for you to love Yue less; she just wants to understand.”

“Thank you, Katara.” Suddenly Sokka’s arms were around Katara’s shoulders, holding her tightly as he cried into her. Katara was shocked at first but quickly brought her hands to rub calming patterns into her brother’s back. 

“Of course,” Katara whispered. 

“How did the meeting with the Tribal Council go?” Sokka asked, whipping the tears from his face, trying to regain a semblance of normalcy, and obviously trying to change the subject. Katara decided she'd let him. She knew he understood. 

“Good,” Katara admitted. “Better than good. Great. They were supportive of Zuko and I. Perhaps too supportive.”

"How so?"

"It's the Tribal Council, how do you think?" Katara deadpanned. "They're absolutely ecstatic at the prospect of a marital alliance between the Water Tribes and the Fire Nation. 

“Will I have to call you Fire Lady Katara, then?” Sokka asked with a cheeky grin. Katara chuckled. 

“I don’t think I want to be the ‘Fire Lady,'" Katara admitted. Sokka's eyes widened in surprise, and he cocked his head. “Oh, no! Don’t get me wrong—I know it’s early, and neither of us is anywhere near ready, and it would break traditions in both of our cultures, but I’d marry Zuko tomorrow if he asked. I just meant I don’t think I want to be called _Fire Lady_ , and I don’t want the performative duties that come with it.”

“And you think Zuko’s advisors will be okay this that?”

“No, but Zuko is, and he’s the one in charge.”

“And you have him wrapped around your little water bending finger, don’t you?” Sokka asked. Katara blushed. “I hope you know I fully plan on using that piece of information to my advantage when I’m the chief,” Sokka joked. Katara pushed him softly, and they both laughed. A comfortable silence befell the siblings. Katara could feel Sokka was slowly becoming himself again. “Katara, I’m so sorry for the way I reacted when you told me about you and Zuko, and I’m even more sorry about the way I’ve been acting since the attack.”

“It’s fine, Sokka.”

“No, it’s not. I’ve been a Jerk. I think you keeping the relationship from me was hard for me at first because I thought we were closer than that, but I understand why you kept it from us, and I’m not mad at you. I’ve seen you go through more pain than most people endure in a lifetime, and I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“You know Zuko won’t hurt me, right?” Katara asked.

“I know, the attack just brought up bad memories that I don't think I ever processed,” Sokka admitted. 

“I understand. What we went through back then was wonderful and miserable. I'm glad we experienced the adventure of a lifetime, but we were kids, and I think we'll be working through the trauma of our experiences forever.” Sokka was quiet. "Sokka, you know what happened to Yue wasn't your fault, right?" 

"Panuk seemed to think it was," Sokka admitted, curling into himself again. Katara rested her head on Sokka's shoulder. 

"Panuk is a jealous asshole who never got over the fact that maybe Yue didn't risk everything for him because she didn't want to become just another ice wife. Why do you think she risked everything for you, Sokka? Unlike Hahn and Panuk, you liked her for her. Not just for her title or her femininity, but for the person she was. You're better than them, Sokka. Don't beat yourself up because of the sentiments of a delusional jerk."

"Shit, Katara, when did you become so smart?" Sokka asked with a sad chuckle. 

"Somewhere in between doing your dirty laundry and becoming a water bending master," Katara teased. 

“I’m so proud of you, Katara,” Sokka said, wrapping Katara in his arms again. “Mom would be too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I can't believe this fic is starting to dwindle because it's been my little emotional-support during quarantine and has really helped me escape from the anxiety of moving and covid and everything. Stay healthy everyone! If anyone ever wants to talk i'm here :)


	24. Like Catching Lighting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is extremely self-indulgent and I really don't care lmaoooo

Katara meandered the opposite direction of diplomat housing. She had something important to do, something she didn't want anyone to know. As she made her way through the frosty alleyways and over the glacial bridges of the Northern Water Tribe city, nostalgia struck Katara. It wasn’t her home, but it was close enough to fill her heart with a flurry. The architecture was grander, and the town larger than her village, but it was still water tribe. She would have been able to make herself at home here if her family had been the ones to relocate to the Northern Water Tribe instead of Panuk's. 

Things would be different if Hakoda moved her and Sokka north after their mother died, but Katara knew things wouldn't be better. Katara approached the eery, icy gate of her destination, and her chest filled with frost. 

"Master Katara," The guard greeted, a little surprised to see her. 

"I'd like to speak to Panuk."

"I'm sorry, Master Katara, but we have a strict no visitors policy for those awaiting trial." 

Katara sighed, "Please, just for a moment?" 

The guard teetered on the decision for a moment. Katara wasn't afraid to use force to get her way into the prison, but she hoped she wouldn't have to.

"Alright, but only five minutes," The guard eventually said, unlocking the gate. "Final cell on the left."

"Thank you." 

As soon as the door screeched open, the sound of chains rattling against metal filled Katara's body with dread. Prisoners, many from Panuk's ship, whistled and called at Katara as she walked by. Katara rolled her eyes. The Northern Water Tribe designed the chamber to limit bending, but Katara knew she could still take any of these men if they challenged her. 

"Ah, Little 'Tara. Did you tire of fire? Tell me, where is that icy heart of yours," Panuk's ominous voice called from the shadows of his cell.

"I didn't come to talk about Zuko," Katara spat. 

"No? So this is a personal visit then? I must say, I'm quite flattered, but I don't feel that way about you." 

"I just came here to say 'thank you,'" Katara said.

"Oh?"

"Thank you for giving me a reason to stand up against our Tribe's sexist traditions. Thank you for showing me what is really important in my life. Thank you for providing me with the motivation to pursue what, and who, I love," Katara's words were nice enough, but her tone was venom, striking for the heart.

"And I thought you said this wasn't about Zuko?" Panuk laughed that evil, sadistic laugh that chilled Katara to her bones. 

"You're deflecting."

"And you, _Master_ Katara, are perhaps the least interesting woman I've ever met. You think I care about what happens in your boring little life?"

"No, but you should," Katara spat. Her eyes darkened. "I could make this trial very quick, Panuk. Better yet, I could persuade the Council and Zuko to have you tried in the Fire Nation. Would you like that; To face the judgment of the Fire Sages?" She raised her hand in the way she does when she blood bends, and Panuk cowered. Katara lowered her fingers. She wasn't going to do it, but it was good to remind him what she was capable of doing. 

Katara started to walk away, but Panuk spoke, low and evil, "I see the Fire Lord has breathed that fire into you."

"Ugh," Katara screamed, whipping around. She couldn't bend right in here; her lashes which whipped at Panuk's face were weak. "This nation deserved better than you. Yue deserved better than you. You're rotten from the inside out, and you'll rot in here for what you've done." 

Katara stormed out, letting Panuk's delirious cackle follow her. Her body shuddered as she faced the cold, fresh air. 

"Master Katara, are you alright?" The guard asked.

"Fine, thank you," Katara said stiffly.

Closure. That's all Katara wanted. She got it, didn't she? Going to see him at all was vindictive, but it provided her the catharsis she'd been craving. _Why do I feel guilty?_ Katara mulled over her feelings as she walked back to diplomat housing.

Katara found Aang and Toph lounging lazily in the diplomat's living room in a way that was less than diplomatic. Toph’s feet hung over the back of the sofa, and her head hung off the edge where legs belonged. Aang’s head rested on her stomach as he fiddled with a piece of ice, spinning it into different shapes with bending. 

"Katara," Aang cheerily called. "Where have you been?"

"Oh, um, just on a walk to clear my head," Katara lied. She felt guilty, but Aang wouldn't understand why she went. Toph would turn the situation into a joke, and Katara didn't have the energy for that. "Where's Sokka?" 

"Loverboy has been lamenting to Suki since this morning... and now they're fuc—"

"For the love of La, Toph, stop!" Katara cringed. Toph just chuckled. "And Zuko?"

"Why? Got an itch for him to scratch?" Toph teased. Aang blushed, and so did Katara.

"You're gross, Toph. I'm just curious."

"Sure you are, Sugar Queen." 

“Master Katara, Avatar Aang, Miss Beifong,” a young man in Northern Water Tribe military garb bowed to the group as he interrupted their conversation. “I come bearing an invitation from Chief Arnook. He has arranged a banquet for this evening to celebrate your group's safety, and the recent trade agreement.”

“Trade agreement?” Aang asked.

“Yes, the Fire Lord just lowered tariffs for Fire Nation imports in exchange for an increase of trade between our two nations,” the man said. Katara fought the urge to roll her eyes because, of course, Zuko did something diplomatic to win the favor of the Joint Water Tribes. She forgot how powerful he was sometimes because she never saw the Fire Lord when she looked at him, just the boy who took a bolt of lightning for her. 

“This banquet, will there be wine?” Toph asked.

“Of course, Miss Beifong; and dancing!”

“Oh, boy, Twinkletoes, it’s your night to shine,” Toph cackled. Aang elbowed her lightly in the ribs, making Katara giggle. 

“Tonight at six, in the reception hall,” the man confirmed, before bowing and turning away. 

* * *

Katara sighed, rummaging through the clothes she brought with her. She didn’t have anything nearly fancy enough for a banquet. Water Tribe celebrations were mostly modest affairs, especially when compared to some of the dinners and parties Katara had witnessed in the Fire Nation. Still, that didn't mean she could wear her everyday dress and boots, either. She hadn’t packed for diplomatic relations and fancy dinners; she’d packed for time alone with friends. More importantly, she packed for warm weather.

_Knock, knock._

Katara opened the door to her quarters to see her grandmother, holding a large white box.

“Gran-Gran!” Katara cried, wrapping her arms around Kanna. 

“Oh, Katara, it’s so wonderful to see you,” Kanna said. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to talk to you before you met with the Council, but I wanted to tell you how proud I am of you for standing up for yourself.”

“Are you sure I wasn’t too harsh?” Katara asked. She hated that she cared, but even if she didn’t agree with much of the Council’s judgment, they were still her elders, and her people. She hated the thought that she might have hurt them. 

“Maybe, but they needed to hear it. You’ve grown into such a capable young lady. Your mother would be so proud of you,” Kanna said, squeezing Katara’s hand lightly. Katara brought her hand to her mother’s necklace and smiled sadly. “That is still your mother’s necklace, isn’t it?”

Katara's face scrunched up. Why wouldn't it be? 

_Oh._

“Of course, Gran Gran. Zuko is far too concerned with the honor to do such a thing without asking for father’s permission. Besides, I don’t think necklaces are how the Fire Nation proposes,” Katara laughed. Kanna hummed quietly. 

"Well, that's not how the Southern Water Tribe does either," Kanna said. 

Katara snorted softly, "try telling that to Sokka."

"You'd think a boy so obsessed with the sword would follow the tradition of a marital blade."

"Yes, but then how would everyone know Suki is his betrothed? It's not like she talks about Sokka every chance she gets," Katara teased. Kanna laughed. There was no malice in their jest.

Katara sighed shakily. “Are you angry about Zuko and me?” 

“No, Katara. I could never be angry with you for falling in love. He’s not what any of us expected or wanted for you, but maybe that’s a good thing. The world is changing, and we can change with it or be left behind. Besides, I think the women in this family have a habit of rebelling from tradition,” Kanna said with a smile. 

“What’s in the box?” Katara asked curiously. 

“I figured you didn’t have anything to wear tonight," Kanna pulled off the lid to reveal a beautiful, long blue dress lined with light grey fur at the hem, wrists, and necklines. 

“Oh, Gran Gran, it’s beautiful.”

“It was mine when I was your age. I know it’s a little old fashion, but it’s warm.”

“No, it’s perfect!” Katara held the dress up to her body. She admired the silver snowflakes stitched onto the bottom. “Thank you!”

“You’re welcome, Katara. I'm sure the Fire Lord will like it too. Pakku sure did when we were young,” Kanna teased, slipping out the door, leaving Katara blushing and dumbfounded. 

* * *

Katara smoothed the dress over her body and smiled at the way it hugged at her hips. _I'm sure Pakku did love this dress,_ Katara snorted to herself. She pulled her hair out of her braids, raking her fingers through the glossy waves before she pinned two pieces into a bun behind her. For the second time that day, a knock Katara hadn’t been expected startled her. She opened the door, expecting to see Zuko, but it wasn’t him.

“Bato,” Katara squeaked excitedly. 

“Hi, Katara, you look lovely,” Bato smiled.

“Thank you. Um, not to be rude, but what are you doing here?”

“Well, seeing as Hakoda isn’t here, I thought I’d escort you to the banquet if that’s okay.”

“Of course!” Katara said, looping her arm through Bato’s, which he presented to her. Bato and her father were so close that walking with him felt like walking with her father. 

“Your father will be so proud when he hears about today,” Bato mused as they descended the stairs towards the reception hall. Katara ducked her head.

“I suppose I should write to him. I’d rather he hear about Zuko and I through me than someone else,” Katara said. Bato nodded in agreement. “Bato, do you think he’ll be upset?”

“About you and Lord Zuko?” Katara nodded. “Doubtful. Hakoda adores that kid. He’s the reason the Water Tribes have such a good relationship with the Fire Nation.”

“How do you mean?” Katara asked. 

“Well, many of us were apprehensive when Lord Zuko took the throne. Many didn’t like or trust him due to circumstances he couldn’t control, but Hakoda advocated for him. Ever since Lord Zuko helped rescue him, Hakoda has been his biggest supporter.” Katara smiled as Bato spoke. “He’s good to you, isn’t he Katara?” 

“He is.”

“I know it’s not my place, but I think of you and Sokka like my own kids, and I’d hate to see either of you get hurt." 

Katara chuckled, "Why does everyone think he's going to hurt me?"

"Unfortunate familial reputation."

"He's a sap." 

"Well, I’d tell him that he’d be in a world of hurt if he ever hurt you, but I pretty sure you could kick his ass faster than I could.”

Katara laughed and whispered, “Thank you, Bato.”

Katara stopped in her tracks to hug Bato tightly. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his cheek on her shoulder the way her dad often did. They stood outside the reception hall now. Katara could hear the music and the people behind the doors. 

“I have a surprise for you.” Bato pushed open the door to the reception hall that was packed with Water Tribe citizens laughing and dancing. 

The smell of smoked salmontrout filled Katara’s nostrils. Without having to look very hard, she spotted her friends across the room. Toph’s giggle was unmistakable, even over the sound of seal drums, and their clothing made them stick out like a cabbage merchant in a meat market. Aang stood proudly, talking to a few Water Tribe children who gawked at his air bending tattoos. To Katara's delight, Suki stood a few steps above Sokka with her arms draped over him. She laughed at something he said, and he yanked her down for a kiss. 

Toph, Suki, Sokka, and Aang were all accounted for, but were was Zuko? She searched for her tall Fire Bender among the sea of blues and purples. His Fire Nation regalia should have been easy to spot. A tribesman who had been talking to Toph turned around, making eye contact with Katara, and that’s when she realized it wasn’t a tribesman at all; it was Zuko. His hair was in a Water Tribe Wolf Tail, not a Fire Nation topknot. Katara’s stomach flipped happily. Katara had never had a hard time finding Zuko attractive, even before they were friends, but seeing him in her culture's traditional robes— _Woah._

Zuko smiled, and she swore she saw him blush a little too. He started to weave his way through the crowd to wear Katara stood.

“Surprise!” Bato whispered in her ear.

“You?” Katara asked happily, turning to look at Bato. He nodded.

“I had an extra pair of robes,” Bato shrugged. “I just wanted to remind you that you don’t have to be the only one in this relationship that makes sacrifices. If you can adapt for him, he can adapt for you. I don’t want to see you throw all of this to become the Fire Lady if he’s not willing to incorporate the Water Tribe into his life too." 

“Thank you.” Katara hugged Bato again, tighter this time. When she pulled apart, Zuko was standing below her on the main floor. He smiled at her brightly. Katara was blushing, but she wasn’t embarrassed. Katara flustered at the mere sight of Zuko in blue.

“Fire Lord Zuko,” Bato bowed politely. 

“Bato,” Zuko returned the gesture. “Do you mind if I steal Katara for the evening?” 

“Have fun,” Hakoda pushed Katara towards Zuko. Zuko grabbed her hand and kissed it. It felt formal and unnatural for them, but Katara had butterflies. She stepped down the icy steps until their feet were at the same level, and Zuko had to cast his eyes downward slightly to make eye contact with her. 

“So, how do I look?” Zuko asked. Katara looked around, making sure no one was too close. 

“If we weren’t in a room full of people, I'd be ripping those robes off you right now.”

“That good, huh?”

“Stunning.”

“I’ll send out for my own robes in the morning.”

“I can’t focus when you look like this.”

“How do you think I feel looking at you all the time?”

Katara brought her hand to Zuko’s hair. “Please wear your hair like this more often.”

“If it makes you look this flushed, I'll wear it like this all the time.” 

Katara’s hand moved from the ends of his hair to behind his head to pull him down. It was inappropriate to kiss Zuko like this, in front of all these people, but Katara didn’t care. Zuko squeezed her hips gently and pulled her off. She whined in detest. 

“You were starting to moan, Darling,” Zuko laughed. _Darling_ , Katara loved the sound of that. He leaned into her ear, whispering, “Later. For now, we feast,”

And feast they did. 

At dinner, people continue to approach Suki and Sokka to congratulate them on their engagement. Sokka was beaming, showing Suki off to everyone like he’d won a grand prize, which Katara thought he had. Suki caught Katara’s eye as Sokka wrapped his arm around her waist, and she mouthed ‘Thank You.’ Katara nodded, leaning into Zuko’s shoulder, as he talked to a group of lively Water Tribe soldiers about 'the way of the blade,' or some other nonsense Katara had tuned out. The hand that had been rest on her knee squeezed gently. He excused himself from the group to stare at Katara fondly. 

“Let’s get drunk!” Toph hiccuped from farther down the table. 

“I think you’re halfway there, Toph,” Katara laughed.

“Maybe so, Sugar Queen, but are we not the guests of honor? Wine is flowing, and I’m not paying, so I don’t intend on wasting it,” Toph smiled wickedly, extending the bottle out towards Katara. Katara giggled, pouring herself and Zuko a generous glass. 

“You trying to get me drunk?” Zuko teased. 

“Yes,” Katara said matter-a-factory. The hand on her thigh tightened. Zuko smiled and finished his glass quickly with a small, almost devilish glint in his eye. The band, which had been playing lively, uptempo Water Tribe folk songs, crescendoed into a waltz number that Katara could hear in the distant memories on her childhood. 

“Dance with me,” Zuko whispered.

“What? I don’t know this dance, Zuko,” Katara whined nervously. 

“That’s okay, me either. Dance with my anyway.” 

Katara reluctantly grabbed Zuko’s hand and let him pull her to the dance floor. Water tribe couples galloped and twirled aground them, including Sokka and Suki, who were a mess of uncoordinated limbs, but they laughed and smiled at each other. “Zuko, I really don’t know how to dance.”

“You never learned how to dance as a child?” 

“Of course I did, but not like this. Southern Water Tribe dances were more… fun and fluid.” _Like water._ “This is so…. Rigid?” _I_ _t almost feels like snowfall._

“We hold our hands out here,” Zuko pulled their hands out, making a straight line from their shoulders to their palms. Zuko’s hand gripped Katara’s ribcage. “Place your hand on my shoulder. Leave your arm up at an angle.” Katara obliged, even though it all felt awkward. “There you go. Now, we step.”

Katara’s feet followed Zuko’s as he stepped backward and whirled them in large circles. Katara suddenly felt overwhelmingly drunk. The alcohol she had ingested warmed her limbs and dizzied her head, but it was more than that. She was drunk on Zuko, and the music, and the myriad of lights above them, which crystalized and illuminated their fluid movements. Zuko was looking at Katara like she was the only girl in the world, and it really felt like she was. 

“I thought the Fire Nation didn’t dance under your father’s rule?”

“Only at weddings. My mom loved to dance, though. She taught me,” Zuko shrugged, and Katara was overwhelmed with affection for Zuko. She broke the dance to hug Zuko. Her face got buried in the furry lining of his robes, but it felt nice. Holding her against his body, Zuko continued to spin softly. 

“Get a room,” Suki teased as she and Sokka whizzed by. Katara wanted to freeze the moment. 

* * *

Katara was drunker than she had been in a long time. She and her friends had been respectable at the banquet. The perfect portrait of prominent international figures, even if they had been consuming generous amounts of wine. As the night dwindled, none of them felt ready for bed. Sokka suggested they continue their festivities in his and Suki’s quarters. Aang and Zuko distracted some of the servers of the banquet, while Suki and Sokka nicked a few more bottles of wine. So maybe not _perfect_ portraits, but, hey, they were technically still on vacation.

Katara was a giggling mess watching Aang and Zuko wrestle. Someone originally suggested a bending match, but when Zuko swayed as he stood, they decided to leave it purely physical, and Zuko was losing quite badly. Zuko would blame it on the plum wine ruminating through his veins, but Katara wasn’t so sure. For someone who disapproved of violence, Aang was quite the fighter. 

Katara realized, sadly, that she only had a few more nights with her friends. In just two days, she and Zuko would be sailing off to the Earth Kingdom, and her friends would be off to their respective homes and duties. The next time they’d all be together like this would be Suki and Sokka’s wedding, which was still nearly six months away. She loved her friends so deeply that it physically hurt her as she looked at them. _Spirits, I’m drunk._

Judging by the way Aang was attempting to hold up both Sokka and Toph at the same time, she wasn’t the only one who overindulged. Zuko pulled her to her feet and kissed her softly. She hummed into his mouth that tasted faintly of plums. 

“Tired?” Zuko asked. Katara nodded, but she wasn’t. She did, however, want to get a little alone time with Zuko. Katara felt herself sober up thinking about being alone with Zuko. They wished their friends goodnight and slipped out the door, much to the drunk protests of Suki, who began to whine when they said they were leaving. Zuko and Katara walked the long halls of the diplomat housing until they reached Katara’s door. She turned to face Zuko.

“Thank you for making me dance tonight,” She whispered. 

“Thank you for dancing.” Zuko took both of Katara’s hands into his and brought them to his lips. “You’re so beautiful, Katara.” Zuko spun her hands around in his, accidentally revealing the crescent shape marks she had dug into her palms earlier during her meeting. “Kat, what happened?”

“Nervous habit,” Katara chuckled nervously. Zuko frowned. “Zuko, it’s fine, don’t worry about it.” Katara tried to pull her hands away, but Zuko held them close to his face. 

“I’m always going to worry about you, Katara,” Zuko stared at the marks with an unreadable expression. “Oh, My Moon,” Zuko sighed, placing a kiss into each palm. Katara froze at the nickname.

“What did you call me?” Katara whispered, unsure that she had heard him correctly. Zuko froze too.

“Oh, I… Sorry, it just kind of slipped out.”

“Say that again,” Katara begged. 

“My Moon,” Zuko whispered, avoiding eye contact. 

“Again.”

“Look, Katara, if you didn’t like it, I won’t use it anymore I—“ Katara kissed Zuko desperately, pulling at his robes. 

“That’s the second pet name you’ve called me tonight. I _loved_ it. I love _you._ ” 

“Really?” 

“Let me show you how much I liked it,” Katara whispered, pulling Zuko back onto her lips for a much less savory. Katara attempted to find the doorknob without breaking this kiss, but Zuko pulled away.

“No, Katara. As much as I want to, it’d be inappropriate for me to share your bed while I’m a guest here. People might talk,” Zuko sighed. 

“Zuko, I don’t think anyone here is under the impression that we haven’t been sharing a bed.” 

That was drunk Katara talking. Sober, smart, diplomatic Katara knew that the context of the banquet, and the wine, and how painstakingly new their relationship was to the members of the Northern Water Tribe would help garner disapproval if anyone saw Zuko sneaking out of her room in the morning. Drunk Katara was hard to quell, though, and she was missing his touch. 

“Still, we both represent our people here. It just wouldn’t be right,” Zuko said. Katara frowned and let out a small whine, attaching herself to his neck for just a second to see if she could break him. Despite a soft groan, Zuko pulled back. _Damn you, and your Spirits forsaken honor._ Zuko kissed her cheek softly. “Goodnight, My Moon.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like... don't want this fic to end? I've finished it, and I'm really sad about it ahhaha


	25. Burning Dark Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah, i'm so sorry this is late, grad school is straight up kicking my ass. I really got in my feelings during this chapter lmao. Thank you for your support again, the next chapter is basically an epilogue, but it's a very long epilogue because i have no self control.

Zuko was a comforting presence next to Katara. Zuko had made Katara feel nearly every emotion under the sun: Rage, delight, love, despair, but now she felt something new with him. It was peace. He smiled at her, warming her insides. That smile which had been so rare in the days of their youth, and seemed increasingly hard to find as adulthood thrust itself upon them, was, perhaps, her favorite view. 

Their friends stopped a few feet in front of Katara and Zuko on the rickety dock. Katara's chest tightened at the sight of their rucksacks. She hated goodbyes. In a few minutes, she'd be on a boat to Ba Sing Se with Zuko, and her friends would be heading home via Appa. 

“Toph, are you sure you don’t want us to give you a lift back to Ba Sing Se?” Zuko asked.

“And spend three days trapped with you two clamorous lovebirds with no escape? No thanks,” Teased Toph, and Sokka groaned at Toph's innuendo. Both Katara and Zuko rolled their eyes at Sokka. 

Then there was silence. Not uncomfortable, just quiet. 

“I’m going to miss you all so much,” Katara finally said.

“Aw, don’t worry, Katara! You’ll… _Sea_ ,” Sokka gestured towards the ocean that lapped against the dock, “us all soon. Get it? Sea? Like the water? Get—you guys don’t get it, do you?” No one laughed, at least not audibly. Now wasn't the time for a Sokkaism. 

“You know, you’re making it really hard for me to miss you,” Katara deadpanned. 

“Miss me? You’ll see me once you’re back from the Earth Kingdom. Unless you have plans to move to the Fire Nation you casually forgot to mention.”

“No, Sokka." _Not yet, anyway._ "I just meant… all of us,” Katara sighed. "This gets harder and harder to coordinate the older we get, and this vacation didn’t go how we planned, and I can’t help thinking that it’s all my fault.”

“It’s not your fault, Katara,” Sokka rolled his eyes at his sister and punched her arm softly. “Besides, it wouldn’t be one of our vacations if something didn’t go wrong, right, BoomerAang?” The group groaned. 

“I thought we agreed that wasn’t a good name,” Aang laughed. “He is right, though, Katara. Regardless of the circumstances, this trip was the most fun I’ve had in months.” 

Katara smiled. 

“I, for one, had a great time watching you kick Panuk’s butt. Well, not watching, but… y'know,” Toph teased, and Katara laughed, but her small giggle was wet from the tears that spilled. “Oh, don’t get all sappy on me, Sugar Queen.”

“Sentimental as ever, Toph,” Katara said, pulling the girl into her for a hug that Toph initially resisted, but eventually gave in. Toph could pretend she didn’t care all she wanted, but Katara could feel the way Toph squeezed just a little too tightly just before they let go.

Suki hugged Katara next. “Thank you,” Suki whispered into her ear so no one else could hear, and gave Katara a knowing smile. Katara’s eyes flittered to Sokka, who was picking something out of his teeth with his boomerang. _Charming_. “I’ll see you soon,” Suki said, louder this time when they pulled out of their hug. “And Zuko, do give Ty Lee my love when you get back. She’ll be upset that she missed all the action, you know.”

Zuko chuckled. “I was only trying to give Ty Lee a little time off,” he defended. 

“Right, that’s why you didn’t ask her to come," teased, looking between Zuko and Katara, who both blushed. Suki hugged Zuko softly. 

Aang stepped forward to Katara, and Katara stepped forward to meet Aang halfway. Katara wished she could ask him how he felt about her and Zuko, and not how he was feeling for their sake, but how he actually felt. Aang smiled at her, and suddenly she was 14 again, and he was the epitome of all of her hope. She did love him. Not like she loved Zuko, but she’d always love Aang. 

“I love you,” Katara said, throwing her arms around Aang’s neck. It was loud enough for Zuko to hear, but Katara knew or hoped at least, that he’d understand. Aang held Katara closely.

“I love you, too, Katara, and I’m proud of you,” Aang sighed. It was enough to let Katara know he understood, and that their friendship hadn’t changed, nor would it ever. Aang released Katara, moving next to Zuko. Zuko was smiling at him. “Hotman,” Aang greeted. 

“Hotman,” Zuko returned with a smile, and then they were hugging. 

Katara’s heart soared. _Her two best boys._ Katara couldn’t help herself. She wedged herself between Zuko and Aang to hug them both. Suki, Sokka, and Toph joined, too. _Just like old times,_ Katara thought. 

“I love you guys,” Aang whispered. The sentiment was shared, and the hug tightened. 

Times change, people grow apart, but not if they’re the people you need in your life. They’d be okay. Forever. 

* * *

“You alright?” Zuko asked from the bow of the ship, not taking his eyes off the sky bison or Sokka, who hadn’t stopped waving, and probably wouldn’t until he was completely out of sight. 

“Surprisingly,” Katara admitted. Katara stood on her toes to kiss Zuko. She sighed into the kiss, ready to deepen it, but someone coughed behind them.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Ming Lee stated. Zuko begrudgingly stopped kissing Katara to face his advisor. “You received another letter from your board of advisors. I’ve tried to let them know what’s going on while remaining as vague as possible, but I’m afraid I’ve reached the end of my abilities to hold them off. You will need to write to them.”

“Oh. Right, yeah, that makes sense. Thank you, Ming Lee,” Zuko said. He addressed Katara, “Will you be alright for a bit?”

“I think I know my way around a ship,” Katara laughed. Zuko pecked her cheek, leaving her with Ming Lee. 

“How are you feeling?” Katara asked Ming Lee, who still moved slowly from his ankle sprain. 

“Much better. Thank you, Master Katara.”

“You can just call me Katara,” She said. 

“You and Lord Zuko aren’t big on formalities,” Ming Lee chuckled. 

Katara laughed. “No, I suppose not.”

“Is that his influence?” Ming Lee asked. “Forgive me for prodding, I’ve just never met two people with so much power who don’t want to be recognized by the titles they’ve earned.” 

Katara smiled. She understood what Ming Lee meant, but she didn’t see it that way.

“I didn’t grow up with titles, so they make me feel like someone I’m not. I like the respect it brings, but before I’m a Master waterbender, I’m just Katara. Zuko…” Katara paused, looking for the right words to describe Zuko’s detest of the Fire Nations' many outdated policies and customs. “Zuko’s family was obsessed with titles, and separating themselves from those they believed were lower than them. When people call him Fire Lord Zuko, I think it reminds him that he’s his father’s son. It's like he believes that people only respect the title, not him, so when people call him Zuko, it’s like they see the man, not the nobility.”

“You care for him very deeply, don’t you?” Ming Lee asked. 

“Very much so.”

“He’s happier with you. More optimistic, too. I think you’re good for him.”

“Thank you, Ming Lee. I hope others carry the same beliefs,” Katara whispered sadly, but she was blushing furiously.

“I can sense you’re nervous about the reaction of Fire Nation citizens when they learn of your relationship.”

“A little,” Katara admitted.

“You shouldn’t be. They’ll adore you just as Zuko does,” Ming Lee smiled. 

“Something tells me that the Fire Lord's opinion of me won't be enough to get them to forget the fact that I'm Water Tribe, but we'll see, I guess."

“Have you ever noticed that as the sun sets over the ocean, when it burns auburn and low, if it hits a breaking wave just right, it sets it ablaze?” Katara nodded along to Ming Lee’s words. “Just something to think about.”

And think about it, she would.

* * *

Later that evening, after Katara had exhausted her time on the deck and become terribly lonely in her quarters, she fled to the room Zuko had been using as an office. Zuko’s guards didn’t look pleased to see her. To be fair, the female guard never did.

“He’s busy,” The Woman spat. 

“I’m sure he’ll see me,” Katara offered with a small smile that didn't get returned. 

“Believe it or not, some things are more important than you.” _Okay, ouch._

“I never said they weren’t. I’d just like to see Zu— _my boyfriend._ ” 

Okay, so that was petty of Katara, but this woman rubbed her the wrong way. She hated Katara for no good reason and didn’t take the time to get to know her. Deep down, she represented all of Katara’s fears about the Fire Nation.

“Well, _your boyfriend_ is the Fire Lord, and _you_ need to understand that you’ll always come in second to our nation,” The guard practically yelled. Katara opened her mouth to retort, but she didn’t have anything good to say. The guard was right. Katara nodded small and turned on her heel to leave, knowing that Zuko probably did need to work. The door to the office opened right as Katara had turned away. 

“Katara?” Zuko asked. “Where are you going?” Katara turned back to face Zuko. He was smiling at her, leaning against the door frame. She wanted to wrap her arms around his neck and lay her head on his chest, but when she made eye contact with the female guard, Katara knew what she needed to say.

“Sorry, I was just going to come to annoy you because I’m bored, but I know you have a lot of work to do.”

“You could never annoy me, Kat.” 

_Want to bet? You won't be pleased to know what I did._

Still, Katara smiled. Zuko extended his hand to Katara to lead her into his office. The little girl in Katara wanted to sneer at the guard, but when she saw her broken face, Katara couldn’t find it in herself to be vindictive. Zuko closed the office door behind them, then cupped Katara’s face to kiss her gently.

“You know, I don’t think your guard likes me very much,” Katara said when Zuko pulled off her lips.

“Kieva? She doesn’t like anybody,” Zuko laughed, sitting in the large armchair. Katara followed, sitting down on the desk and tracing her fingers through Zuko’s hair softly. 

“She likes you,” Katara offered. She stared deep into his soft eyes. They were beautiful, even if one was harder to see. 

“Are you jealous?” Zuko teased, pulling Katara off of the desk and into his lap. She thought about his question for a second. Kieva was beautiful, even if she was a little brooding, but hadn't that once been Zuko's type? She was strong, loyal, and she often had close, one-on-one contact with Zuko. Katara had every right to feel jealous, but when she saw how Zuko was beaming at her, she realized she wasn’t.

“I’m always going to be a little jealous, Zuko, but not really,” Katara said, bringing her hand to Zuko’s neck to pull him in for a deep kiss. 

“Oh, My Moon, you have absolutely nothing to worry about,” Zuko whispered, inches from her lips. She knew he was right if for no reason other than blind optimism. She loved him, and he loved her. That was more than enough. "What's wrong?" Katara realized she hadn't been kissing back.

"I have to tell you something." 

"Okay." Zuko's breath hitched.

"You're not going to like it," Katara said, looking away from him. "I visited Panuk on the day of my trial. I went intending to be cruel. I know it was spiteful, but I was looking for some sort of closure."

"And did you get it?" Zuko eventually said. 

Katara sighed, "Yeah, I think so." 

Katara still hadn't looked at Zuko. She was ashamed, but she was more worried about how he'd react.

"Well then it sounds to me like you followed through on a personal quest," Zuko said, kissing her slow and deep.

And there was the fundamental difference between her relationship with Aang and Zuko. Aang, despite his good intentions, didn't love the parts of her she didn't even like. He placed her on a pedestal from the beginning. He tried to fix her negative qualities that didn't need to fixing at all. Zuko understood her flaws and loved her not despite them, but perhaps because of them. 

Suddenly, in a way Katara didn't know possible, Zuko became the sun her world revolved around, and she knew she'd stay tethered to him for the rest of her life. 

* * *

Zuko sighed into Katara’s hair the morning they arrived in Ba Sing Se. He needed to get up, to get ready to face his uncle’s interrogation and senseless antidotes, but he couldn’t move. Not when the most amazing woman he’d ever met was soft and warm with sleep next to him. She stirred, only to wrap her arms around him and bury her head into his chest. He felt her lips press into his chest where the lightning had struck, and she hummed quietly. 

“Morning,” Zuko whispered.

“No, too early.”

“You are your brother’s sister, aren’t you?” Zuko teased, squeezing Katara’s sides. She sat up to rub the sleep from her eyes. 

“Are you excited to see your Uncle?”

Zuko sat up too and kissed Katara’s shoulder gently. “Yeah, but I know he’s going to try to embarrass me.”

“I know, I'm excited,” teased Katara. Zuko shoved her shoulder softly, and she giggled.

Katara pressed her lips into his, their lips moving in an off-beat rhythm. The kiss was needy, but not presumptuous. It begged for more but didn’t expect anything. Zuko tangled his fingers into Katara’s wild hair. She crawled onto him, and he resisted the urge to press his hips up into hers.

“You’re beautiful,” Zuko mumbled, moving his hands up and down Katara’s thighs, sliding them under her underwear where the soft fabric gripped her hips. Her mouth opened slightly, and her eyes rolled back a little. Soft purrs escaped Katara’s lips as Zuko’s thumbs rubbed giant circles over her hips, which rolled over him ever so slightly, desperate for friction. Zuko sat up, keeping Katara in his lap to whisper, “I’ll take you right here, right now if you keep making those noises,” soft and dirty into her ear. Katara’s eyes darkened a little. 

“Well, how precocious of you, _Your Highness_ ,” Katara teased, grinding down onto Zuko’s hips, and _fuck, that’s hot._ Both of them stifled a moan. Zuko was halfway to hard.

“Hm, ‘Your Highness’… I like the sound of that coming out of your mouth,” Zuko keened, bucking into Katara.

“You’re a scoundrel, _Your Highness,_ ” Katara bit his lip

“And you love me,” Zuko retorted.

“And I love you,” Katara repeated, and Zuko could have finished to that alone, but Katara dismounted his hips. “Unfortunately, we have a tea date with your uncle, and I need to get ready.”

Zuko whined, and Katara winked at him as she left his room.

* * *

The steps to the Jasmin Dragon were familiar to both Zuko and Katara, who spent some time there with their friends after they’d defeated Zuko’s father. It was comforting to be somewhere familiar that didn’t have any negative memories tied to it. The doors to the Jasmin Dragon swung open before Zuko and Katara had even reached the top step.

“Nephew!” Iroh called. Zuko’s heart swelled. It had been too long.

“Uncle!” Zuko yelled, leaving Katara’s side to hug his uncle. His uncle’s hugs were some of the most comforting in the world, and after the events of his vacation, he needed an Iroh hug.

“You brought the girl,” Iroh stated under his breath. “Master Katara, it is good to see you again,” Iroh said with a bow.

“General Iroh, it’s an _honor,_ ” Katara said with a smirk and glance at Zuko, who rolled his eyes playfully. He was never going to live that down. Iroh grabbed Zuko’s ear and pulled him down to his level.

“Ah, Uncle!” Zuko called.

“She is much more beautiful than I remember and far too beautiful for you to wait to tell her. Women like her do not wait, nor are they without many suitors.” Iroh said, and Zuko knew that was the truth. He saw how people gawked at Katara. He was jealous, of course, but it made him proud knowing the girl who loved him was the object of desire for everyone else. He didn’t understand why Katara wanted him, but she did, and that was enough. "Have you told her yet?"

“Told me what?” Katara feigned innocence with a sly smile that only Zuko would read. She wasn’t kidding when she said that she was excited to see Iroh embarrass Zuko. Iroh lightly slapped Zuko upside the head. Katara giggled, wrapping her slender fingers around Zuko’s bicep. “Just kidding. He’s made his feelings quite clear.”

“Has he now?” Iroh pondered, sarcastically rubbing his beard. “And tell me, Master Katara, how much of a fool did my nephew make of himself when he told you of his affections?” 

“Truthfully, it was I who made a fool of themselves. Your Nephew, though not very subtle, is quite stoic.”

“So, you do feel the same?” 

“Very much so, yes. Zuko is quite the gentlemen. Something I assume he learned from you.”

“Oh, Flattery, Master Katara, will absolutely get you everywhere with me.”

“Is that so? Well, then let me tell you about how much I adore your Oolong Tea,” Katara smiled, reaching for Iroh’s outstretched arm, leaving Zuko’s side.

“Oh, I like her, Zuko.” 

Zuko stood slackjawed, admiring how in just two seconds, Katara had Iroh wrapped around her fingers. 

“You’ll catch flies if you’re not careful, Zuko,” Katara teased. Iroh chuckled, murmuring about how much he did like Katara. Zuko smiled fondly.

* * *

Zuko still hated Pai Sho. There was no way to make the game enjoyable, or so he thought until he saw Katara concentrating on which tile to move. Her eyes lit up as she strategized. It was not unlike her eyes when they sparred in the field behind Aang’s home. 

Okay, so Pai Sho wasn’t all bad.

“It’s impolite to stare, Nephew,” Iroh teased, eyes barely moving from the board. Zuko’s cheeks blossomed to a light rouge. Katara smiled at him, though, and squeezed his leg under the table, sending a jolt through his entire body. Her thumb traced an innocent, but a deliberate circle. 

_Don’t start what you can’t finish, Kat._

“Well played, Master Katara. Not many can beat me at Pai Sho. Certainly not those who associate with Fire Lord Zuko,” Iroh chuckled. Zuko took his attention away from Katara’s hand, and his thoughts, which had turned somewhat lewd, to see that Katara had beaten Iroh. “Where did you learn to play?” 

“My father taught me when I was little.” 

“Your father seems like a good man.”

“He is,” Katara said. “The best.” 

“How does he feel about your newfound affections for my nephew?” Iroh asked, pouring them all another cup of tea. Zuko felt nervous suddenly. Had Katara told her father? How would Hakodate react? He liked Zuko, sure, but as a person, not as a potential mate for Katara. 

“He, um, he doesn’t know yet,” Katara smiled somewhat sheepishly at Zuko. “But he adores Zuko. I’m sure it will be fine.”

“You didn’t ask for her father’s permission?” Iroh asked, wide-eyed.

“Uncle, we’re dating; not engaged,” Zuko reasoned. 

“For now,” Iroh teased. 

Zuko’s shoulders involuntarily raised to his shoulders as he winced at the comment. Why was everyone in such a rush to see them married? He’d experienced the pressure before, especially as his and Mai’s relationship started to decline. His advisors had begged him to propose to secure an heir to the throne as early as possible. The pressure Katara faced, and that he now faced by association was considerably worse. Katara didn’t look upset or embarrassed by the comment, though.

“Don’t worry, Zuko. My father already sees you as part of the family. I know that sort of thing matters, especially in the Fire Nation, but truthfully my father isn't all that traditional after everything our family has gone through.”

“Even still, it is customary in a royal courtship to ask the bride’s father for her hand through a feast,” Iroh said. “Courtships in the Fire Nation are quite rigid and traditional,” Iroh mentioned, almost apologetically, before sipping his tea. 

"I suppose there isn't a way around that," Katara sighed. Zuko frowned, noticing how Katara went clammy over the comment. 

“Nothing about this relationship has been traditional, Uncle. I think our customs need to be updated, don’t you? I mean, nearly every royal marriage resulted in a loveless and oppressive power dynamic. The customs of courtship reinforce the customs of a time when women weren't allowed jobs."

"Zuko, there are some things that you, even as the Fire Lord, can't change," Katara sighed, now squeezing Zuko's hand, which rested on the table. "It's already going to be hard enough for your people to accept that I'm not one of them. We shouldn't push it."

"Not necessarily. It was Zuko's great-great-grandfather, Fire Lord Zaun, who started the nationalist movement in the Fire Nation. Before Zaun, international marriages for diplomatic, and even romantic purposes, were quite common. Many of the past Fire Ladies were not of Fire Nation descent."

"I never knew," Zuko said.

"My father worked hard to rewrite the history taught in the Fire Nation, so that does not surprise me," Iroh replied. Zuko made a mental note to speak to the minister of education on that matter. Zuko turned his attention to Katara. 

"Regardless, I don’t want our marriage, whenever that may happen, to turn out anything like my fathers. I want you to be happy with me. I want you to be happy with the role you’ll play in my life, and the role you'll play in the Fire Nation. We can resculpt the position of Fire Lady to be something important.”

Tears were welling in Katara’s eyes at the comment. _Agni, tell me those are tears of joy_. Katara flung her arms around Zuko’s neck, and though he felt uncomfortable being kissed so feverishly in public, and in front of his uncle, Zuko let Katara press her lips to his. 

“Thank you,” Katara whispered.

"Whatever you want, I want to give it to you. Advisors be damned." 

“Nephew, I never pegged you as a romantic,” Iroh said, wiping a small tear away from his eyes. Katara giggled, leaning her head on Zuko’s shoulder.

Tomorrow, she’d be going home, and for weeks, their relationship would have to consist of letters and lingering memories of moments like these. They’d see each other again soon in Republic City, and after that, at Suki and Sokka’s wedding. He was sure she’d come to visit him for prolonged periods, and Zuko would make time to see her in the Southern Water Tribe, but their time would be fleeting for a while until Zuko made her his wife. For now, though, the anticipation of passionate, short-lived rendezvous and escapades would have to be enough. 

Iroh babbled on about the history of Fire Ladies, but Zuko was too busy drinking Katara in. Zuko had never had a hard time remembering the sound of Katara’s laugh, or the sweet smell of her hair. Now that they were together, there was so much more he needed to imprint into his brain to save him from the tedious meetings he’d have to endure in the Fire Nation without Katara there. Zuko attempted to memorize the curve of her hips and the way her lips had felt on his. As if trying to engrave the feeling of her hand in his, he squeezed her palm against his. Her thumb brushed over the knuckle of his thumb. It was simultaneously too much and not enough. 

That night, as they made love until dawn was nearly breaking, Zuko willed his brain to record the soft sounds of her moans and pleas. Her kisses burned into his skin like a tattoo that would linger forever. He tried to etch the feeling of her naked body lying on his. He studied the way she always had to hook her leg over his and latch herself onto his arm.

More than anything, though, he tried to memorize the way the words “I love you” sounded as they came from her lips.


	26. Autumn Leaves Fall, Like Lovers Do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my God, I can't believe the day has come where I finish this fic. I'm really emo, so enjoy my super sappy message at the end. For now, enjoy, and know that every piece of feedback I've recieved on this fic has meant the world to me.

Change was imminent. It showed in the leaves that burned gold and fell off of the Maple and Ginko trees that surrounded the Fire Palace Gardens. It was in the crisp mornings which melted away into warm afternoons. The days were getting shorter again, but with that came the feeling of hope and new beginnings. It was starting to get cold again, too. Even if the Fire Nation remained mostly temperate year-round, there was no denying the slight chill that bit through the early autumn wind. 

Zuko stood on the docks of Caldera, eyes peering sharply onto the horizon like a hawk looking for prey. In his case, however, the prey in question was a small Southern Water Tribe boat that carried the most precious cargo of all: his water bender. Zuko’s chest tightened when he saw a wooden boat with blue and white sails upon its mass enter through the gates of the Fire Nation harbor. 

Long-distance had been difficult, but not nearly as impossible as Zuko thought it was going to be. The beginning was brutal for both of them. Though the three and a half weeks between leaving Ba Sing Se and reuniting for the Republic City Building Summit would be the shortest amount of time apart, it was the most agonizing. They sent so many letters to each other in such a short time that they were full of empty sentences and about one thousand, “I miss you’s." He’d found out later that Katara kept every letter he had ever sent her in a chest under her bed. 

His advisors begged Zuko to keep public interactions with Katara diplomatic until after The Building Summit, but Zuko didn’t listen. As soon as he had Katara at arm’s reach in Republic City, he was enveloping her into a cheesy, overly romantic hug that had even Aang gagging. Katara didn’t mind, though. She met his lips with as much passion as him. She didn’t care that diplomats and world leaders alike were watching—not when she'd received a glimpse of heaven, then denied that feeling for nearly a month. Not the public debut his advisors had been hoping for, but the news of Katara and Zuko’s relationship traveled quickly and met with generally good reception. 

Members of A.P.P.A. praised Katara and Zuko for their ability to remain impartial, professional, and unbiased during the building summit, which helped the public reception of their relationship immensely. Zuko couldn’t take credit for that. During the first break out session, when Katara’s seat was arranged next to his by a stroke of luck, he attempted to squeeze her leg lovingly under the table. As quickly as his fingers moved to her upper thigh, they were frozen under the table by Katara. 

“Don’t start what you can’t finish, Lord Zuko,” Katara whispered to him without breaking eye contact with the Earth King, and _Yeah, I love this woman,_ Zuko thought. 

They spent two months apart before they have reunited again for Sokka and Suki’s wedding, which was a surprisingly extravagant affair. Sokka claimed to hate all the fluff, but there was no doubt in Zuko’s mind that he had been the one to insist on all of it. Suki didn’t seem to mind taking the blame for it. Zuko came prepared to complain about the fact that Sokka and Suki chose to have an October wedding in the coldest place in the world, but with Katara around to keep him warm, it hadn’t been all that freezing. As they swayed on the dance floor to a romantic tune, Zuko felt the warmer than ever. Once his bending had derived from hate, then from the light of the dragons, but now, it was Katara that stoked his inner fire. 

“What?” Katara had asked him, and that’s when Zuko realized he’d stopped swaying to the music. 

“I’m the luckiest guy in the world,” Zuko sighed. He leaned down to kiss Katara. 

“Actually, dude, that title belongs to me,” Sokka interrupted, spinning Suki into his side. “Plus, you haven’t lived with Katara. She's got a whacky sleep schedule, and she always hogs breakfast. The magic will wear off eventually,” Sokka was teasing. 

“Do you have to ruin everything?” Katara sighed, shaking her head fondly at her brother. 

“That’s my job.”

“Suki, it’s not too late for you to run,” Katara teased. 

“Unfortunately, I think I’m stuck with him,” Suki said, kissing Sokka softly and letting herself get swept away by Sokka’s surprisingly good dancing. Katara looked back to Zuko with a fond smile. 

“Do you think we’ll still be that insufferable after seven years?” Katara asked. 

“Seven years? That’s a little optimistic for a breakfast hoarder, isn't it?” Zuko taunted with a wicked smile. Katara laughed, pushing herself off of Zuko’s chest softly, but Zuko caught her by the hips before she could pull away. “We’ll be worse.” 

It was six weeks after that until they reunited in the Earth Kingdom for the Kyoshi Banquet. Ty Lee had been so excited for some girl time with Suki and Katara that Zuko barely saw his girlfriend until the Fireworks show on the last night. As the glittering lights illuminated Katara’s face, which shined brighter than any of the spectacles in the sky, Zuko reflected on his life. Some spirit must have forgiven his past mistakes because he really didn’t deserve her, but he was not complaining. Every small decision he’d ever made led him to Katara. Their fates intertwined years ago, and Zuko planned on doing everything in his power to make sure they stayed that way. 

After that, Katara started spending prolonged periods in the Fire Nation. Week-long reunions became month-long trysts. They’d spend the first two days tangled up in bedsheets before Katara would slip from the palace doors to her home a few miles away. 

“Just stay here, Katara,” Zuko whined the first time she visited after she insisted she stay in her own home. 

“I can’t, Zuko, it’d be indecent.”

“And you consider what we just did to be decent?” Zuko was still naked and breathing heavy. 

“We’ve already broken nearly all of your advisor's rules of this relationship" Zuko's advisors had a lot of rules that they claimed would help Katara and Zuko maintain a favorable public opinion. Zuko had never liked rules much anyway. "I doubt they’d like me staying here. I’d like to maintain some level of public decorum. Even if the entire public already knows we’re sleeping together, It just doesn’t look right to have the Fire Lord’s unbetrothed, Water Tribe girlfriend sharing his bed. It’s not proper.” 

“So we’ll sneak you out in the mornings so you can be publicly seen entering the palace gates,” Zuko Countered. Katara, who had finished redressing herself, crawled on top of Zuko’s hips. “Caldera has quite an impressive tunnel system the public doesn’t know about.”

“Zuko, as much as I’d like to stay, we both know I can’t. When your advisors tell me it’s okay, I’d love nothing more than to experience palace life, but for now, I have to go.”

Katara kissed Zuko’s lips and slid out the door.

The last time she’d stayed in the Fire Nation had begun with the same argument, but ended Katara secretly crashing with Zuko after a few too many Fire Whiskeys. That had been nearly three months ago. 

This time would be different, though; Zuko had made sure of it.

His advisors, despite their best judgment, loved Katara, and Zuko knew it. Katara was painfully honest, annoyingly honorable, and fretfully sweet. Everyone loved Katara. It hadn't taken much convincing when Zuko told his advisors he'd prepared her a room in the East Wing. Not that Zuko planned on letting Katara stay in that room, but for appearances' sake, it appeased his council. 

The ship he’d been staring at had docked. Members of the Royal navy grabbed the moorings and tied the boats to the pilings on the dock. A ramp descended from the wooden hull of the ship, and Zuko’s heart soared as he saw Katara in her lightweight water tribe dress. She practically ran down the ramp, across the dock, and into his arms. Zuko stumbled backward from the force of her hug but managed to lift her nonetheless.

“Zuko,” Katara breathed out by his ear, causing a chill to run up his body.

“Kat,” He practically whimpered back. Her scent enveloped him. Three months was far too long for Zuko’s taste. Never again. Katara pressed her lips against his, and it was a sloppy kiss, but it was wonderful all the same. He eventually set her down, walking her to his advisors who’d been waiting to escort them back to the Fire Palace.

“Master Katara, welcome back to Caldera,” Ming Lee greeted with a genuine smile. Out of all of his advisors, Ming Lee liked Katara the best, and that feeling was mutual. Zuko could feel Katara fighting the urge to wrap her arms around the older man. Katara bowed politely to Ming Lee and the other two advisors, who nodded briefly.

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Katara asked. She wasn’t used to Zuko’s advisors meeting her when she docked. Zuko bit his lower lip, trying to withhold a smile.

“There is a room for you in the East Wing of the palace if you’d rather stay within the palace walls instead of your residence,” Ming Lee said. Katara turned to Zuko with a shocked expression.

“Wait, seriously?”

“This charade has gone on long enough. We’ve been closely monitoring public opinion after your chaperoned appearances. We have no reason to believe that your staying in a separate wing of the Fire Palace will negatively impact that opinion,” Ming Lee said, taking Katara’s small duffle bag from her with a kind smile. “Would you like to stay?”

“I would, thank you,” Katara said, not taking her eyes off of Zuko’s. As Zuko and Katara made their way towards the palace, Katara leaned in to whisper, “You had something to do with this, didn’t you?”

“No,” Zuko lied.

“Liar.”

“Are you angry?” If Zuko sounded smug, it’s because he was.

“Undetermined.”

“Now who's the liar?”

* * *

The only thing Zuko hated about having Katara in the Fire Nation was the lack of privacy they had anywhere outside of the palace gates. He understood the need for chaperones in theory, but they were annoying in practice. Before they were a couple, Zuko could’ve brought Katara out to the Fire Nation, snuck them into any bar, and let them stumble back to the palace in a drunken stooper without anyone batting an eye. As it was, his advisor Eiko followed him and Katara during their afternoon stroll.

“Your Highness, I insist you take palanquin,” Eiko pleaded.

“No, we’ll walk,” Zuko affirmed. He wasn’t fond of palanquin rides. They made him feel pretentious, and Katara was sure to hate them, too. Plus, Zuko wanted Katara to feel comfortable in the Fire Nation. He didn’t want to make her a spectacle.

Fire Nation citizens were interesting. They’d turn their heads and gawk at anything that screamed royalty, but it was fairly easy to walk through the streets of Caldera undetected is Zuko wore a ribbon in his hair instead of the golden flame crown. It was even casual robes instead of his royal ones. Zuko wasn’t oblivious to the stares, though, as he strode throw Caldera's garden promenade with a water bender on his arms. For once, though, it wasn’t he who stuck out like a sore thumb, but Katara.

“They’re staring,” Katara whispered.

“You don’t exactly blend in.”

“And you’d rather see me in Fire Nation Robes?”

“No,” Zuko paused, thinking of what to sat next. “Katara, you know I don’t expect you to bend your will to every Fire Nation normality, right?”

“I know,” Katara shook her head, trying to rid herself of Fire Nation expectations. “Where are we going?”

“Do they not teach patience in the Water Tribe?” Katara pinched the inside of Zuko’s bicep ever so slightly.

“They do. I just chose to ignore that lesson,” Katara quipped, eyes bulging at the bustling streets of the Fire Nation. Zuko beamed with a sense of pride. Rebuilding hadn’t been easy. Had he not found friendship in Aang, and more importantly, Katara, he wasn’t sure he would have been able to reconstruct a military state to a nation that thrived. His first few years as Fire Lord had been tense, but he’d found more time to relax and enjoy his success in recent times.

“We’re here,” Zuko stopped them in front of something underwhelming that Zuko knew could be incredible after Katara got her hands on it. “Surprised!”

“It’s… an abandoned hospital?”

“It, uh… yeah it was a hospital at one point.”

“I don’t understand.”

“It hasn’t been a healing center for as long as I’ve been alive, but I know it was one at some point based on the ancient Fire Nation sign atop of it,” Zuko said, gesturing towards the scribbled emblem at the crest of the building. “My father turned it into a, um, place for kids.” Zuko left his sentence vague on purpose. He wasn't proud of what his father did.

“Kids?” Katara nervously chuckled. “Ozai didn’t strike me as the philanthropic type— _Oh._ By kids, you meant… child soldiers?”

“Unfortunately.”

“Zuko, why would you bring me here?” Katara turned away harshly, tears brimming.

“Because I want you to have it.”

“Why would I want something your father used to torture children with?”

“I, Uh… Well, you said you didn’t want to have ceremonial duties, and I wanted to show you that you don’t have to. This building still belongs to the royal family—Er, _me,_ and I have no use for it. I wanted you to have it for… well, whatever you want. It could be a healing center, a cultural center, a rehabilitation center, a personal space for you to get away from me once—if—you ever make this move permanent.”

Katara threw her arms around Zuko unceremoniously. How many people must be staring, Zuko thought, but he didn’t really care.

“When Zuko. When I make this move permanent.”

“When.”

"It does have potential," Katara mused. "And I do like the idea of word reaching your father in prison that his son's Water Tribe girlfriend turned his Ozai Youth center into some sort of diplomacy center."

Zuko let out an aggressive laugh. "It might just kill him. Wouldn't be the worst thing." Katara brought her hand to Zuko's face lovingly, and sympathetically. Zuko didn't want his daddy issues to ruin the moment. "So, you like it then?"

“I love it,” Katara mewled, trying and failing not to beam at Zuko. “And I love you.”

“I love you,” Zuko choked out.

“Why do you always sound so surprised?”

“Because I am. After everything I’ve done, I just—it’s hard for me to comprehend you want me, you’ll have to be patient with me as hard as I know that is for you.”

Katara snorted. “Did the Fire Lord just attempt a joke?”

“Depends on whether or not you found it amusing.”

Katara caught Zuko’s bottom lip in her teeth before connecting their full lips. “I have all the patience in the world for you, Zuko.”

On the stroll back to the Fire Palace, Katara insisted they stop through the market place, much to Eiko’s chagrin.

“Please, Eiko, I just want to see what the Caldera markets once. I’ve heard they're amazing. Please?” Katara had begged. It was a relief to Zuko that he wasn’t the only one susceptible to Katara’s puppy dog eyes.

“Fine, Lady Katara,” and Zuko didn’t miss the way the term _l_ _ady_ made Katara stand taller and grip at Zuko’s forearm. “Please, stay close to Fire Lord Zuko," Eiko warned. 

The market place was easy to get lost in. It was crowded and full of ornery merchants looking to barter. Zuko didn’t mind keeping Katara close, though. The crowd started to thin as they reached the edge of the market place. While Zuko rounded left back to the Fire Palace, Katara made a sharp right towards a flower cart. In an attempt to not lose Katara, Zuko and Katara both ended up bumping into a young girl, sending her basket of groceries tumbling.

Katara gasped, immediately apologizing profusely, and dropping to her knees to help the girl pick up her items. Zuko used his long limbs to his advantage, stopping the mangoes that rolled away. 

“I’m so, so sorry, is everything okay?” Katara asked, helping the girl up.

“It’s fine,” the girl huffed, but it didn’t sound _fine_ at all.

Zuko looked the girl up and down. She couldn’t have been more than 15. Her tattered robes were only noticeable if you stared for a long time, but there wasn't much to look at. She was skinny in a way that suggested she didn’t eat nearly enough. Her hair was pulled back into a modest low ponytail. Everything about her was easy to overlook, especially if you had money, as many people in the capital city did. Zuko wasn’t trying to pass judgment on a girl he didn’t know. He was studying her the way he did all Fire Nation citizens he met. It hurt him to know how much poverty still plagued his people. 

“Here,” Zuko said, placing the mangoes and tea in her basket.

“Thanks,” The girl muttered bitterly.

“Are you alright?”

“Fine, _Agni,_ ” the girl spat, but her eyes blew wide when she saw Zuko. _Ah, cover blown._ “Fire Lord Zuko!” The girl squeaked, bowing low and formal. Zuko shifted his weight, looking awkwardly at Katara, who raised her eyebrows at him.

“There’s no need to bow, uh…”

“Wei, My Lord.”

“Wei,” Zuko repeated. “Seriously, you don’t need to keep avoiding eye contact, it’s okay. I’m the one who bumped into you. Are you sure you’ll be alright?”

“Yes, My Lord, thank you," Wei's tone was different, now, the way all persons was when they realized who Zuko was.

“And our groceries? Are they damaged?” Katara asked.

“Some, but we’ve lived on less before,” Wei said, and Zuko’s heart broke.

“Right.”

“Oh, no, I didn’t mean—it’s not your fault! Things are much better than they used to be. My father was an, uh, unwilling member of the Royal Army. We basically had nothing, but your rehabilitation program has helped so much,” Wei smiled. A sense of pride and guilt washed over Zuko.

“I’m glad to hear things are better,” Zuko smiled awkwardly. “Let me pay for your groceries, as an apology for ruining them in the first place.”

“Oh, no, My Lord. I couldn’t accept it.”

“I insist."

“Thank you, really, but it’s fine.”

“Wei—“

“Oh, Spirits," Katara interrupted. “If you can’t accept his help, accept mine,” Katara said, taking golden coins out from her pocket. “The fall was at least 50% my fault.”

Wei tentatively took the money from Katara with a small smile. Zuko beamed at Katara.

“You’re Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, aren’t you?” Wei almost whispered.

“I—yeah, I am. How did you know that?” Katara asked.

“We don’t get many Water Tribe women in that capital, Master Katara, and certainly not with the Fire Lord,” Wei smiled for a second and then realized what she said. “Oh, please forgive me for speaking out of turn, My Lord. I didn’t mean to infer anything.”

“It’s alright,” Katara said, speaking for Zuko. She leaned into a fake whisper, “Between you and me, I think jokes like that go right over _Your Lord's_ head.”

Wei giggled. “Master Katara, before I go, I just wanted to say thank you.”

“Thank you? To me? Why?”

“I know I’m young, but I remember how things were before the war ended. It’s so much better now. My family is so much happier now, and it’s because of you.”

“That’s very kind of you to say, but I think the people you want to be thanking are the Avatar for defeating Ozai and Zuko for putting things back together,” Katara said.

“It’s not that I’m not grateful for all you’ve done, My Lord because I am, but Master Katara, it wouldn’t have been possible without you." Zuko agreed with Wei. He'd been trying to tell her that for years, and she'd blown him off. Now maybe she'd listen.

"I don't know about that," Katara laughed awkwardly. _Okay, so maybe not._

 _"_ If you hadn’t defeated Azula, she might have become the Fire Lord, and I’ve heard she is scarier and more ambitious than Ozai. If you hadn’t saved Lord Zuko, who knows where this nation would be now. The people of the Fire Nation owe you a whole lot,” Wei said.

Katara blushed furiously, and Zuko swore he saw a small tear slide down her cheeks.

“Did you pay her to say that?” Katara asked Zuko, and Wei laughed loudly.

“No,” Zuko said because it was the truth, but to tease Katara a little, he winked at Wei with his good eye, and the blush that should have just crept its way onto her cheeks and rested there, traveled all the way to the tips of her ears. 

“I should be going,” Wei said with a small smile. “It was nice to meet you, Master Katara. You as well, Lord Zuko,” Wei bowed politely. She stared at Zuko for a tick, as if wondering how to say what she wanted, or wondering if she could. As she stepped by Zuko, she whispered, “She’s really pretty.”

_Yeah, I think so too._

Katara leaned her head on Zuko’s shoulder.

“I told you your people would like me,” Katara teased.

“Actually, I told you that,” Zuko quipped.

“Don’t ruin the moment.”

Though he wasn't surprised, Zuko couldn’t help but smile at how easily Katara was able to charm the people of the Fire Nation. Even Eiko, who was stern and pragmatic, was smiling on their walk back. Katara let Zuko guide her back to the Fire Palace, where the public believed she’d be staying in the east wing, but Zuko had no intention of letting her out of his clutches anytime soon. 

Not ever, actually. 

Zuko had plans to make this visit a little more permanent.

Despite Katara claiming that he didn't need Hakoda's permission, Zuko asked for it anyway when he visited the Southern Water Tribe for Sokka and Suki's wedding. He asked because it was honorable, but also because his uncle might kill him if he found out he didn't. After being toppled onto the ice by his friends, but mainly Katara, Zuko looked for any moment where he could sneak away to talk to the Southern Chief. He found that moment two hours into his visit. The girls were off, spending a man-free night with Suki that would eventually end with Katara drunkenly crawling into his hut and immediately falling asleep on his chest. Sokka and Aang were preparing for their own guys night, but Zuko figured he'd have better luck sneaking away from Aang and Sokka than Toph. 

He found Hakoda standing outside of his home, chatting with a few men from the Southern Navy. The men, the boys, really, went rigid upon seeing Zuko. If Zuko wasn't nauseously nervous, he'd feel bad about their reaction. Hakoda smiled warmly at Zuko, and Zuko couldn't help but think about how it was ever so slightly lopsided the same way Katara's was. 

"Chief Hakoda," Zuko greeted formally, yet kindly. 

"Fire Lord Zuko, welcome to the Southern Water Tribe."

"It's great to be here under, um, happier circumstances," Zuko smiled somewhat sarcastically. "I was hoping I could have a word with you somewhere private."

"Ah," Hakoda said uncomfortably. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather not talk about political affairs at my son's wedding."

"Understood. I'd like this to be a Fire-Lord-Zuko-free weekend, too. This is actually about a personal matter, Sir." 

"Personal mat—Oh. _Oh._ Right, of course. Please, come inside."

Hakoda sent the Naval men away and opened the great door to his home. Zuko's hands were clammy. Zuko smiled at a small picture of Hakoda, Kya, Katara, and Sokka, which rested on the mantle of the main room. He resisted the urge to pick it up and lovingly stroke the image of young Katara, smiling in her father's arms. They looked so happy then. 

"What can I do for you, Zuko?" Hakoda asked. 

"Right. Well, um, first, thank you for being so gracious with me over the past few years, Chief Hakoda."

"Zuko, if it's all the same to you, you can just call me Hakoda. I know we're world leaders and all, but you dating my daughter kind of gives you a pass to call me by my name."

Zuko blushed, ducking his head slightly, looking at his feet. "Right. Thank you, Sir—er—Hakoda." _Agni, I'm not going to be able to get through this."_ Well, um, okay. Dating your daughter has been the adventure of a lifetime."

Hakoda snorted. "I'd bet."

"And, well, she means a great deal to me. She did before we started dating, but now... I can't imagine my life without her and, um..." Zuko sputtered. He looked up at Hakoda, who wore a cheesy, sly grin.

"Go ahead," Hakoda smirked. 

"Uh, yeah. What I'm trying to say—ask is—I'd like your permission to ask for Katara's hand in marriage."

The silence pounded on Zuko's heartstrings. Zuko couldn't register what was happening behind Hakoda's smug expression that he'd worn since Zuko started stuttering in his living room. _Say something. Say anything._

Hakoda began to laugh, a deep, hearty laugh that filled the room, and Zuko was ready to dissolve into the bear rug beneath his feet. 

"Oh, Zuko, I'm not laughing because of the question, I'm laughing because you thought you had to ask, and about how nervous you are. Of course, you have my permission, but even if you didn't, my daughter has always done what she's wanted, what she thought was right. I don't think either of us really has a say in your union. Once Katara's got her mind set on something, it's nearly impossible to change it."

"And you believe she's set it on being the Fire Lady?" Zuko knew she wanted to be married to him eventually, but _set_ had a much different connotation to it. 

"I do. You should see the way she holds herself at tribal and council meetings now. She's already wearing that crown in her mind," Hakoda laughed. Zuko visibly relaxed.

"I might just have to bring that up," Zuko laughed breathlessly. 

"Look, Zuko, I can't promise you that people here are going to like the idea of Katara becoming the Fire Lady. Many are still healing from the wounds of the war, and Katara has faced quite a bit of flack, especially from our elders, for choosing a firebender, however, I've considered you a part of this family since Boiling Rock, and Katara isn't easily dismayed by what others think." 

"I know," Zuko smiled fondly, subconsciously bringing his hand to his scar. Katara never pretended not to see it as many people did. He hated that bullshit. It was there, and it was obvious, and it was a part of who he was. He didn't like it when people stared, either, but the ones who did were usually the ones who tried to pretend they didn't notice. Katara, though, Katara offered to help him when he was the enemy, not because it bothered her, but because she hated how it bothered him. Now, habitually, Katara always kissed that cheek as if to tell him she loved all of him, even the mistakes. 

Hakoda smiled at Zuko, begging him to wait a few months before proposing because he really couldn't handle the stress of another wedding shortly, especially not for his daughter. 

Fire Nation proposals weren’t opulent events. In most cases, the man presented the woman with a fire garnet and professed his intentions. 

Royal courtships, on the other hand, were gauche and systematically planned by the Fire family. Parades, feasts, and expensive gifts were the bare minimum. As it was, neither of those options would work for Katara. In an ornate box hidden under blankets in the chest by Zuko’s bed was a traditional Southern Water Tribe proposal blade he’d had wielded and incrested with opals and sapphires, and one small ruby on the bottom of the hilt. Engraved on the blade were the words, “You rise with the moon," on one side, and, "I rise with the sun” on the other. 

It was incredibly sappy of Zuko to use that quote he’d said to her years ago. He wasn’t sure she’d even remember him saying it, but it always felt like the mantra he had to repeat to himself to remind him that they couldn’t be together. Now, it seemed to do the opposite, and as they reached the palace gates, Katara squeezed Zuko's arm. 

“What’s wrong?” Katara asked. Zuko had been quiet for a long time, imagining Katara saying yes, because he knew she would.

“For the first time in a long time, absolutely nothing.”

He imagined her eyes tearing up as she gripped the blade. He imagined how her face would light up when he presented her with the Fire Lady crown that he had made for special her, which was a crescent moon instead of a traditional flame. He knew she’d kiss him and bury herself into his neck the way she did when she was overwhelmingly happy. They’d hold each other for a while, thinking about how far they’d come from the caves of Ba Sing Se, and then they’d fall into bed together. 

Like lovers do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And just like that, it's over.
> 
> I started writing this fic super self-indulgently. When I first watched this show I was, *gasp*, a Kataang shipper. Then I rewatched it again with my mom and I realized just how good, how needed, Zutara's dynamic is. I still think Kataang is adorable (but maybe that's because I just want my babies to be happy), but Zutara just... hits different for lack of a better term. This was a fix-it fic that I never really intended to finish, because I never finish fics, but once I started, it was like I couldn't stop. Theses characters, and the world of Avatar have impacted me during this quarantine in a way that I wasn't expecting and I'm so, so grateful to have found solace and escapism in this place.
> 
> When I say your support meant everything to me, I meant it. I haven't written a fic in a really long time, and I was apprehensive about it because I was afraid that writing wouldn't bring me as much joy as it used to, or that I wouldn't be able to connect to others like I once had. Every Kudos made my heart soar, and your comments not only made my days a little brighter, but so many of them (especially the ones about how much we all hate Panuk) made me cackle. I oddly feel like I know many of you from just the small insight you've given me. I recognize your screen names and I get excited to see how differently you all react. So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so, so much. 
> 
> If you've gotten this far into my note, just know that I love you. I'm already writing another fic in my head that I hope to post somewhat soon. While it's still Zutara, it will be a bit different from this one. It'll most likely be a shorter one-shot and very, very explicit. I hope, if you liked this fic, you'll like my new one too. I hope everyone is healthy and safe, and working through the emotions of things that are happening. If, like me, you're american, and the impending election, death of titan, and anger towards the institutions of our country have you feeling exhausted and hopeless, just know that better times are ahead, and PLEASE vote in november a bitch!!! is!!! tired!!!
> 
> Anyway, thank you again. Love y'all sm. Follow me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/sukkadeservedbetter)!


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